Mafioso bloggers

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I never responded to the most oft-voiced comment about the opening-page art for that Los Angeles magazine piece about "The Blog Whisperers," which is that David Poland looks like either Clemenza or Don Barzini...some scary guy from Little Italy. That led to a thought about whether any other entertainment or Oscar-blog writers remind anyone of any character in either The Godfather films or on The Sopranos.

Pete Hammond doesn't remind me of any mafioso types -- too amiable and industry-centric, zero malevolence, too much laughter and good will.

I can't think of any character whom N.Y. Times Oscar guy David Carr might be either except, on a reach, a blend of two Sopranos characters -- Jerry Adler's 'Hesh' Rabkin plus Peter Reigert's State Assemblyman Ronald Zellman.

Sasha Stone is not Connie Corleone or Carmela Soprano, but I could make a case for her being a blend of Dr. Jennifer Melfi with a tiny sprinkling of Annabella Sciorra's steak-throwing car dealer, Gloria Trillo.

In Contention's Kris Tapley sees himself as blend of Clemenza and Tom Hagen. I say he's young Michael Corleone just when he's convincing Sonny that he's got the steel to shoot Virgil "The Turk" Sollozzo in that Bronx restaurant.

Tom O'Neil doesn't have a gang bone in his body (okay, maybe a little tiny bit of John Ventimiglia/Artie Bucco) but Coming Soon's Edward Douglas could be...I'm lost. Drawing a blank. Any thoughts on anyone else? Who's Devin Faraci?

I'm obviously not the best judge, but I would say I'm made up of one part Christopher Moltisanti (as played by Michael Imperioli on The Sopranos), one part Tom Hagen/Robert Duvall and one part Sonny Corleone/James Caan.

Postscript: One of the above-named voices wrote in around 3:30 pm to say that Poland reminds him/her of Sterling Hayden's Capt. McCluskey, the guy who got shot along with Sollozzo by Michael Corleone.

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Posted by Jeffrey Wells on February 4, 2007 at 10:42 AM

comment #1

Noah says ...

I'd say you're one hundred percent Fredo.

Posted by Noah at February 4, 2007 11:51 AM

comment #2

tholl-yung says ...

You two are Laurel and Hardy all the way, and everyone else is a Peanuts character, with Sasha as Lucy, Devin as Charlie Brown, Ed Douglas as Snoopy and LYT as Pig Pen.

Posted by tholl-yung at February 4, 2007 11:57 AM

comment #3

gruver1 says ...

Wells to Noah: I knew someone would try to pin Fredo on me...I knew it. Nobody in the world in any profession wants to be Fredo. I also think anyone who tries to lay Fredo on someone else is probably dealing with deep-down Fredo issues of his own.

Posted by gruver1 at February 4, 2007 12:08 PM

comment #4

Movie fan09 says ...

na.
I would say according to your site pic...you look like robert mitchum the most.

Posted by Movie fan09 at February 4, 2007 12:12 PM

comment #5

Devin Faraci says ...

I'm Francis Ford Coppola.

Posted by Devin Faraci at February 4, 2007 12:14 PM

comment #6

jeffmcm says ...

Did Robert Mitchum melt before he died?

Posted by jeffmcm at February 4, 2007 12:15 PM

comment #7

Noah says ...

I was actually just making a joke, Jeff, but thank you for trying to psycho-analyze me based on it.

Posted by Noah at February 4, 2007 12:44 PM

comment #8

JD says ...

I think you're looking in the wrong places, Jeff. If Oscar bloggers have to be compared to mafioso, I think gangster comedies are the place to look. I saw a ridiculous video of David Poland ranting at Sundance a few weeks ago and I immediately thought of the two bit gangsters in movies like Innocent Blood, Analyze This, and Wise Guys. Of course, I have no idea where I saw the clip so I can't really prove my point.

Posted by JD at February 4, 2007 12:50 PM

comment #9

jsnpritchett says ...

Jeff, I don't seem to recall you "managing" Kevin Smith's website or acting as his "web man," assuming the article is referring to MoviePoopShoot? I know that I wrote two regular columns for the site and was one of the original writers when the site launched. I don't recall ever dealing with you in any regard.

As I remember it, the site simply ran your "Hollywood Confidential" Chris Ryall was the editor for the site.

Posted by jsnpritchett at February 4, 2007 12:56 PM

comment #10

jsnpritchett says ...

Sorry--that last post should have said "...the site simply ran your "Hollywood Confidential" column. Chris Ryall was the editor for the site."

Posted by jsnpritchett at February 4, 2007 12:57 PM

comment #11

gruver1 says ...

Wells to Noah: The line "I was just making a joke" is understood in some quarters to mean "it didn't mean anything." The reason jokes are funny is that they do mean something -- they echo reality. If they didn't, people wouldn't laugh at them.

Posted by gruver1 at February 4, 2007 12:58 PM

comment #12

gruver1 says ...

Wells to jnspritchett: The Los Angeles magazine piece said I "ran" MoviePoopShoot? Another mistake they could have easily gotten right if the fact-checker had asked.

Posted by gruver1 at February 4, 2007 1:02 PM

comment #13

jsnpritchett says ...

Jeff, as I mentioned in my first post, Los Angeles magazine implies and then outright states that you had a managerial role at the site.

The first paragraph of the article says "In his West Hollywood apartment, Jeffrey Wells, a much-traveled movie writer, whose last job had been as writer-director Kevin Smith's web man..." Later, on page 101, the article says, "In 1999, he switched to the internet, writing a movie column for the now-defunct Reel.com and then managing Kevin Smith's website for two year before being laid off." That paragraph then continues with a direct quote from you regarding Smith giving you two months after he "cut you loose."

I do not feel that the article's characterization of your role at MoviePoopShoot is accurate.

Posted by jsnpritchett at February 4, 2007 1:08 PM

comment #14

LYTrules says ...

Pig Pen? Apparently T. Holly has seen my apartment.

I've always thought Jeffrey has a bit of a Christopher Walken resemblance. Not an original observation, though -- even he has noted same.

Posted by LYTrules at February 4, 2007 1:09 PM

comment #15

Noah says ...

Okay Jeff, you're right...my mistake. You are Fredo.

Posted by Noah at February 4, 2007 1:20 PM

comment #16

gruver1 says ...

Wells to jsnprithcett No shit?

Posted by gruver1 at February 4, 2007 1:22 PM

comment #17

jsnpritchett says ...

Jeff, assuming your comment to me is meant to ask if I'm joking about the quotes, then, no, I'm not.

Posted by jsnpritchett at February 4, 2007 1:25 PM

comment #18

alynch says ...

I'd say Wells is Max Bercovicz/James Woods

Posted by alynch at February 4, 2007 1:30 PM

comment #19

tholl-yung says ...

LYT, can we get photogs of you in your bathroom dying your rainbow hair? David Carr is Kay Adams. Harry Knowles is The Don. Connie is?... Joe Leydon.

Posted by tholl-yung at February 4, 2007 1:40 PM

comment #20

gruver1 says ...

Wells to jsnpritchett: For fuck's sake, I was being facetious.

Posted by gruver1 at February 4, 2007 1:42 PM

comment #21

nemo says ...

Most of the comments about Poland had more to do with his appearance in the picture, rather than his personality or character, which Wells seems to be focusing on in this post. As far as Poland's appearance is concerned, the Mafioso and third Belushi comparisons all seem right, whether they fit his personality or not. I still think he looks like a young version of the original Mayor Daley.

I can see both the Mitchum and the Walken resemblance in Wells. Walken especially in the eyes -- otherwise, Wells looks a lot more robust and healthy. But as far as physical appearance goes, I still think he looks more like Gordon MacRae in Carousel or Oklahoma:

http://hollywood-elsewhere.com/archives/2006/08/jackman_doing_c.php
http://hollywood-elsewhere.com/archives/2006/11/carousel_proble.php

He's got the whole 1950s motorcycle-driving roustabout cowboy hair, sideburns, square-jawed leading man thing going.

But as far as a personality match, alynch is right: Wells should be played by a prickly pear cactus like James Woods.

Posted by nemo at February 4, 2007 1:48 PM

comment #22

Geoff says ...

I say Poland is Vito Spatafore....season six.

Posted by Geoff at February 4, 2007 2:35 PM

comment #23

bipedalist says ...

I just, I don't even know where to go with this. I like being Dr. Melfi (he cast me as the good egg) but let's face it, I'd rather be boning Tony at the zoo, so I'll take the suicidal sexpot any day.

Posted by bipedalist at February 4, 2007 3:01 PM

comment #24