Garlin's "Cheese" is finally opening

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I spoke yesterday with Jeff Garlin, the director, writer and star of I Want Someone to Eat Cheese With (IFC First Take), which finally opens limited on 9.5.07. "Finally" because fans of this film -- an agreeably witty and poignant character comedy in the general vein of Paddy Chayefsky's Marty -- have been waiting to see it in theatres since it played and scored at the 2006 Tribeca Film Festival, about 16 months ago.

After catching it a couple of months later at at the L.A. Film Festival I called Garlins' film "a Big Fat Greek Wedding for witty fat guys, only without the wedding or the slobbery cattle-yard relatives."

It's a sharply written (here and there genius-level) comedy-drama about a witty, likably humble Chicago comedian named James (Garlin) who lives with his mom but badly wants a soulmate girlfriend. Vaguely fortyish, James is saddled with a yen for slurping down junk food late at night (which costs him in the romantic department), and he's pretty good at getting shot down or turned down or fired.

But as gloomy as James sometimes gets (and for good reason), he's tenacious in a shuffling, good-natured, comme ci comme ca way, and you can't help but feel for the guy and want him to succeed.

Director-producer-writer Garlin -- best known for his ongoing role as Larry David's manager in HBO's Curb Your Enthusiasm -- and his fellow performers (Bonnie Hunt, Sarah Silverman and a team of Chicago-based actor pals) are all top-notch. And in an unassuming little-movie way with the emphasis on spirit and tone and quirky-hip humor, Cheese works.

One thing: The fact that there's no Cheese website doesn't exactly help matters. IFC and Weinstein almost never pay for websites, but Garlin does pretty well and lives a fairly flush life, so he could obviously afford to pay for it himself....but he hasn't. He could get a decent site designed and launched for less than $10 grand. If you the reader had a good little film you'd made and nourished and brought along step by step, wouldn't you make sure it had a website one way or another? I sure as shit would.

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Posted by Jeffrey Wells on August 23, 2007 at 11:58 AM

comment #1

MilkMan says ...

The is my nomination for Worst Title of the Year.
Jeff Garlin is not funny. He should've made a movie about that. That I would've seen. A movie about a fat guy who thinks he's funny because he's fat. Isn't that what all fat guys think? They think, Hey, I'm not good looking, but I'm smart and funny, because I have to be something. Well, guess what? Sometimes you're just fat and not funny and not very smart. I mean, where does this guy get the confidence from? That's what I want to know and that's what this idiotic-sounding movie should be about, A Fat Guy Who Convinces Himself That He's Funny In Spite Of Evidence To The Contrary And Makes A Movie Where He Is The Romantic Lead. Because that's all women want, right? They just want a guy who can make them laugh. It doesn't matter that the guy is fat and a slob. Does this movie end with Jeff Garlin sitting in his car, in some empty parking lot, eating a Double-Double soaked in tears? It should. But it won't. And that's why this movie sounds like a lie. But the title should've been a dead giveaway. I Want Someone to Eat Cheese With. Sounds like a self-help book.

Posted by MilkMan at August 23, 2007 12:41 PM

comment #2

Bocephus says ...

yikes Milkman, did Garlin shit on your lawn or somthing?

Posted by Bocephus at August 23, 2007 12:58 PM

comment #3

BurmaShave says ...

Does anyone actually go to a movie because it has a website? I'm genuinely curious. Seems like a waste of money to me. Also, MilkMan is a dick, but he is right about thing, it's a terrible title.

If MilkMan knew his shit he would know that Garlin is one of the most beloved comedians among comedians, with close friendships to people like Jon Stewart and Conan O'Brien, who was once his roommate. Clearly he is vouched for by some of the best of the best.

Posted by BurmaShave at August 23, 2007 1:11 PM

comment #4

christian says ...

i love garlin on CYE. nobody can say "fuck" like he did when larry screwed up the lakers game...

Posted by christian at August 23, 2007 1:12 PM

comment #5

MilkMan says ...

Yes, Jeff Garlin shit on my lawn, about six months ago, he was driving home from Apple Pan, where he had two Hickory Burgers, an order of fries, two Cokes, and a slice of Banana Cream Pie. He also got a Ham Sandwich to go, but he ate it in the car, a la Dom Deluise circa Fatso, and that must've been what put him over the edge, because he swerved his Range Rover onto my lawn, popped a squat and let 'er rip. When I asked him what he thought he was doing, he said, Don't worry, I'm Jeff Garlin, I have a new film coming out soon and it's called I Want Someone to Eat Cheese With, my best friend is Conan O'Brien, and Burma Shave really knows my shit better than anyone, he can tell what I ate from twenty feet away. I offered him some toilet paper but before he could take it from me Burma Shave jumped out of the Range Rover and licked him clean.

Posted by MilkMan at August 23, 2007 1:25 PM

comment #6

BurmaShave says ...

Touche!

Posted by BurmaShave at August 23, 2007 1:29 PM

comment #7

MilkMan says ...

That was really juvenile of me. I'm sorry. It's time for me to be punished. That's why I'm going to tweeze out all of my chest hairs during my lunch break.

Posted by MilkMan at August 23, 2007 1:41 PM

comment #8

Ju-osh says ...

Milkman:
Your posts are funnier when they're spread out, a little at a time. Lately, though, you're posting waaaay too often, and trying a wee bit too hard to get the 'funny guy' superlative in the Hollywood Elsewhere yearbook.
You're coming off like the spastic kid in the back of the class making lots of fart noises and 'that's what she said' remarks.
And/or Dane Cook.

Posted by Ju-osh at August 23, 2007 1:59 PM

comment #9

MilkMan says ...

Ju-osh: No one likes me where I work. If you saw me you would understand. It's actually quite perceptive of you to call me a spazz, because I'm a dead ringer for Eddie Deezen. I've tried to make friends with the people at my office, but they don't seem to like me, which is their prerogative, except it's in my nature to be a real Chatty Kathy. So that's why I hang out at HE, because it's the only oppotunity I get to communicate with people. Please don't make me leave! I promise that I'll stop trying to be funny. Just don't ignore me. Or Dane Cook. Is Dane Cook Canadian, by the way?

Posted by MilkMan at August 23, 2007 2:10 PM

comment #10

The Winchester says ...

Ju-osh, let's be fair. Milkman is WAY funnier than Dane Cook.

Posted by The Winchester at August 23, 2007 2:11 PM

comment #11

giantman says ...

I'm also interested in this revelation that a movie needs a website thing. As a serious (usually) fan of movies and films I almost never, ever visit a movies website thingy. a) because I know it's almost 100% pure marketing drivel, and b) cause I have waaaay better things to do while waiting for a meeting (like reading HE and then commenting, which goes to show you how far down the list of important things visiting movie websites must be.)

Just curious if anyone else buys into this supposed need for a website.

And btw, I personally think he is funny, even though he is over-weight. And btw2, I also believe this might be the worst title for a movie so far this year.

Posted by giantman at August 23, 2007 2:16 PM

comment #12

Monument says ...

I rarely visit websites, and if I do it's for a trailer that hasn't been released elsewhere.

Posted by Monument at August 23, 2007 2:29 PM

comment #13

thezipper says ...

Come on! It's a great title. On par with Cop Gives Waitress 2 Million Dollar Tip.

Posted by thezipper at August 23, 2007 2:30 PM

comment #14

christian says ...

the last movie web site that i ever visited and that meant anything other than marketing pulp was...THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT...sigh...

and it's still up and running!

Posted by christian at August 23, 2007 2:39 PM

comment #15

Josh Massey says ...

I haven't been to a movie's official website in years, I bet. Except when I accidentally click the banner ads, of course.

Posted by Josh Massey at August 23, 2007 2:43 PM

comment #16

BurmaShave says ...

christian, thanks for reminding me of the Blair Witch site. I had no idea it was still up and running. A great trip down memory lane, made my day.

Posted by BurmaShave at August 23, 2007 2:45 PM

comment #17

T. Holly says ...

10k? ouch. A web site is good for knowing when a small film will be in your area, but an MP3 at HE and an acknowledgement from Jeffrey Wells is priceless.

Milkman, you do not write like a kid, as you claim to be.

Posted by T. Holly at August 23, 2007 4:01 PM

comment #18

MilkMan says ...

I'm emotionally stunted, T. Holly. I have the psychosexual pathologies of a twelve year old boy.

Posted by MilkMan at August 23, 2007 4:59 PM

comment #19

Peterson says ...

Anyone who remembers Chatty Cathy dolls will never see 40 again.

Posted by Peterson at August 23, 2007 5:13 PM

comment #20

T. Holly says ...

R-A-P-E.

Posted by T. Holly at August 23, 2007 5:22 PM

comment #21

Spacelamb says ...

MilkMan has a bit of a point. Mean, but a point nonetheless. I've met a quite a few fat guys who have no looks or charm so they've gone the funny route. They think. The thing is, they're not funny. They just think that reciting catchphrases from sitcoms is funny, but being funny at a level where it's considered part of your character ("That guys cracks me up!") takes talent, which people don't automatically have just because they are fat. They got nothin'! BTW, I have no issues with Garlin. Also, I'm Australian, so what's a Double Double? We don't have those here.

Posted by Spacelamb at August 23, 2007 6:40 PM

comment #22

christian says ...

garlin is hilarious and comes off as a sweet guy. "the doll" episode of CYE would not work without him.

double double is a burger from in-n-out, a famous chain here.

Posted by christian at August 23, 2007 6:56 PM

comment #23

btwnproductions says ...

In NY, IFC has scheduled just one screening that I know of. I don't think the theatrical release is much of a priority. I imagine it'll get more play on DVD or PV, given the stars' TV credentials.

And I rarely visit movie websites, either.

Posted by btwnproductions at August 23, 2007 7:46 PM

comment #24