Posted by Jeffrey Wells on April 9, 2008 at 11:37 PM

comment #1

BurmaShave Author Profile Page says ...

People always say it when they drive older routes through stripmalls and gas stations, but I always notice it in urban setting: all of America is really starting to look the same. This could be a picture of Chelsea north of 24th, or Denver, or Philadelphia, or Ballston right here in Virginia. And yes, hell.

Posted by BurmaShave Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 2:05 AM

comment #2

bachelorcool Author Profile Page says ...

Is it Westwood?

Posted by bachelorcool Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 4:47 AM

comment #3

Rich S. Author Profile Page says ...

But...but....you got that gorgeous Narnia artwork to keep you company!

Posted by Rich S. Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 5:35 AM

comment #4

MPNeeb Author Profile Page says ...

It is Westwood. In 2008.
Be cooler if it were Westwood 1996.

Posted by MPNeeb Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 5:58 AM

comment #5

jghoward Author Profile Page says ...

Good point, Burma Shave. Depressing. Robert Moses and his ilk pretty much destroyed American civilization, at least for the foreseeable future. Sucks to be us.

Posted by jghoward Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 5:58 AM

comment #6

Rosebudsthesled Author Profile Page says ...

Now where are all the people playing ball from their convertibles and the excessive honking and the giant Shell truck and all the dead bodies and burnt up cars on the road? Crazy Godard reference!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by Rosebudsthesled Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 6:40 AM

comment #7

rocco Author Profile Page says ...

The thing that sticks out most to me is that the car putting out the most soot and CO2 in the photo is none other than the one in which green advocate Mr. Wells is sitting.

Posted by rocco Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 7:15 AM

comment #8

actionman Author Profile Page says ...

This is why I am leaving Hell-A.

Posted by actionman Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 7:32 AM

comment #9

D.Z. Author Profile Page says ...

actionman: Lucky you.

Posted by D.Z. Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 7:37 AM

comment #10

Aris P Author Profile Page says ...

As am I (leaving this place). Actionman - where are you moving to? I'm substituting one hell for another (of sorts), though one which I welcome.

Posted by Aris P Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 7:48 AM

comment #11

Wrecktum Author Profile Page says ...

LOL, as if leaving L.A. will fix whatever problems you're having. L.A. is a great city. Some day the traffic issues here will stabilize. Whether it's via more mass transit, flying cars or beaming technology, things will get better. So have fun in whatever rust belt hovel your moving to. We'll kick back here in beautiful SoCal and continue to laugh at the world.

Posted by Wrecktum Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 8:17 AM

comment #12

D.Z. Author Profile Page says ...

Wrecktum: The traffic isn't the only annoying thing about L.A. There's the lack of places to hang out, overpriced rental units, compared to the most of the country-except for NYC-and the lack of (attractive) women in the 18-25 demo living here.

Posted by D.Z. Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 8:44 AM

comment #13

tommysunshine Author Profile Page says ...

Wells, this site just keeps getting better and better. But am I the only one who finds Burma Shave's musings on everything rather tiresome?

It's as though Matthew McConaughey discovered the New Journalism school of writers and decided to unleash his every ill-thought out, unoriginal observation.

Nothing against you Burma, but I think Gawker may be more your style. We come here to read Wells and others who bring something new to the party, not to be overwhelmed by the contributions of someone whose literary ambitions should begin, and end, with envelope stuffing at Barnes and Noble.

Posted by tommysunshine Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 9:30 AM

comment #14

Aris P Author Profile Page says ...

DZ - i disagree; i think there are tons of attractive women here. not much in their brains, for the most part, but pretty hot. Wrecktum - in the rust belt, i could probably live in a house for the amount of rent i pay here. compared to that, i'm actually living in a hovel now. Nice condescending tone, as usual.

Posted by Aris P Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 9:30 AM

comment #15

actionman Author Profile Page says ...

Wrecktum...you don't know shit about me or my "problems," thank you very much.

L.A. blows. It's a soulless hell-hole and after 6 years, I've had enough. I will miss the Arclight and In-and-Out burger; that's about it. The weather is overrated, the people suck, and when your realize that you don't give a flying fuck how movies actually get made, there's really no reason to stick around a place that is infested with some of the most disgusting people imaginable.

I've also been lucky enough to get engaged to a wonderful woman and we both want to start a family. And only a fucking moron would raise a family out here, at least in my eyes. We're moving back to where we were born/raised, Connecticut, and I will either work in CT or commute to NYC (don't really want to do that to be honest). I am looking for simple after 6 years of complicated. And not for a minute am I suggesting that everything will be picture-perfect back east, it's just that that's where I'm most comfortable.

L.A. is a filthy city, with zero sense of community; it's a bunch of disconnected areas populated with either the most pretentious people you can find or the stupidest people you can find. It's quite sad really.

I got my fill of living in L.A., I worked for some great companies, and saw/did things I never thought I ever would.

So, Wrectum, that's why I am leaving. But before I leave this post, I feel like dismantling you a little bit. Here goes:

"Some day the traffic issues here will stabilize."

Umm...are you fucking kidding? Or just delusional. Every year, there are more people coming INTO L.A., rather than LEAVING. So, how will traffic get better? Yeah, traffic will get better with all of the illegal immigrants driving around when they can barely speak English.

" Whether it's via more mass transit, flying cars or beaming technology, things will get better."

You've been watching Back the Future Part 2 way too much. And I don't blame you, it's a great piece of entertainment. But c'mon...

" So have fun in whatever rust belt hovel your moving to. We'll kick back here in beautiful SoCal and continue to laugh at the world."

Connecticut is hardly a "hovel." If you'd ever venture past the Mississippi you might know that. And yeah, kick-back and have fun whe the next earth quake happens or the next round of mudslides occur or when some terrorist cell realizes that L.A. is just about perfect for a bombing or three. Laugh at the world? I'll be laughing as the city disappears in my rear view mirror on June 18th as I bolt down the 10 East. And yeah, it'll be hystyerical when I move into a brand-new, beautiful, 2 bedroom apartment in CT and pay less than what I pay now for a shit-hole built in the 30's. I'll definitely have a laugh over that one.

Posted by actionman Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 9:40 AM

comment #16

actionman Author Profile Page says ...

Oh yeah, the women are hot (but mostly retarded) and the ganja is deluxe in Los Angeles.

Two more pros.

But way too many cons.

Posted by actionman Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 9:49 AM

comment #17

Wrecktum Author Profile Page says ...

"Nice condescending tone, as usual. "

Thanks. That's why I'm here.

Posted by Wrecktum Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 9:57 AM

comment #18

Wrecktum Author Profile Page says ...

Issues, actionman, issues. NYC has the best therapists in the world, so have fun.

Bridgeport is beautiful in August and splendid in February. Go Giants!

Posted by Wrecktum Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 10:06 AM

comment #19

CinemaPhreek Author Profile Page says ...

In and Out Burger stopped being good and just merely over hyped nostalgia about 7 years ago. To hold prices down, they just kept adding filler until now the patties taste only slightly better than AM/PM.

If you want a good burger in LA and don't want to pay the prices at someplace like Islands or H. Hamlet, the best deal in town is the happy hour $2 cheeseburger (with fries) at McCormick & Schmick's (they have two happy hours, afternoon and evening, M-Thurs)

Posted by CinemaPhreek Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 10:15 AM

comment #20

actionman Author Profile Page says ...

'Issues, actionman, issues. NYC has the best therapists in the world, so have fun."

You are a funny little one, I must admit!

Aidos muchacho!

Posted by actionman Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 10:23 AM

comment #21

Wrecktum Author Profile Page says ...

Bon voyage. Have a safe trip...I mean it.

Posted by Wrecktum Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 10:36 AM

comment #22

christian Author Profile Page says ...

"Now where are all the people playing ball from their convertibles and the excessive honking and the giant Shell truck and all the dead bodies and burnt up cars on the road?"

That's the metaphor in WEEKEND for what is already happening here and elsewhere. Godard called it.

Sorry to hear you're leaving, actionman. We'll have to catch a flick before you bail. LA is heaven and hell wrapped up in one ball of smog and confusion.

And the first words out of my mouth this morning was to a Ashton Kucher-esque hipster in my hood who nearly ran me over in his car while on the cell phone. I leaned into his window and said, "Hey did you see that stop sign?" He ignored me. I said, "Hey dickhead, get off the phone." He ignored me and drove on. It's hard for me to accept that level of self-absorption but it is the dominant personality trait here.

Posted by christian Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 10:39 AM

comment #23

actionman Author Profile Page says ...

Christian: you got my email...would love to catch a flick. I'm here till June 18th.

Posted by actionman Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 10:44 AM

comment #24

frankbooth Author Profile Page says ...

Wrecktum,

That's a very utopian, Star Trek view of the future you have.

How do you know it won't be more like Blade Runner?

Posted by frankbooth Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 11:08 AM

comment #25

Rich S. Author Profile Page says ...

Hey, there were flying cars in Blade Runner! Of course, only the cops could afford them, but still.

Posted by Rich S. Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 11:35 AM

comment #26

Wrecktum Author Profile Page says ...

"How do you know it won't be more like Blade Runner?"

Because Blade Runner sucks and Star Trek is cool.

Posted by Wrecktum Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 11:46 AM

comment #27

RMBurnett Author Profile Page says ...

Folks,

On June 4th, I mark my 20th anniversary here in Los Angeles. I'm currently editing a low-budget feature, producing another low budget horror film (shooting in Bulgaria next month), dating an incredibly smart, beautiful sexy woman and on Saturday, I'm marking my 10th year of playing beach volleyball in Manhattan Beach. Los Angeles is what you make of it. There's few places in the world where ambition, ability and tenacity are so richly rewarded. Plus, the people I've met since I've been here, most friends for the better part of two decades, have been incredibly inspirational with their own successes and encouragement. I wouldn't want to live anywhere else.

Posted by RMBurnett Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 11:53 AM

comment #28

RMBurnett Author Profile Page says ...

One more thing...

VALKYRIE is excellent. Anyone wanting to understand why it's delayed should look at UA's cash-flow issues.

And, why didn't anyone go see THE RUINS...? What a great time at the Arclight for me and the six other people in the theater. Best english language horror film since THE DECENT.

Posted by RMBurnett Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 11:56 AM

comment #29

Jeffrey Kunze Author Profile Page says ...

Actionman:

Hey, I'm from Stratford, CT. Where are you originally from and where are you going to be living?


Wrecktum: CT is a very diverse state and just because Bridgeport is a horrible city, doesn't mean the rest of CT is similar.

Why are you so defensive? Don't you have any complaints about living in the City of Angels or is it just heaven on Earth for you?

Posted by Jeffrey Kunze Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 1:03 PM

comment #30

Jeffrey Kunze Author Profile Page says ...

RMBurnett: I've heard from many reliable people that The Ruins is awful. Really, really awful. I've heard the plants mimic cell phones. That's laughable.

The critics haven't been too kind either.

Was the book really that bad or is this just a piss-poor adaptation.

Posted by Jeffrey Kunze Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 1:08 PM

comment #31

John Y Author Profile Page says ...

Three things:

1. Wells should know better than to drive on Wilshire Blvd. during what was probably rush hour. There are many alternatives that are much less crowded. That's the thing - there's a lot of traffic in L.A., but if you know your way around the city, it's never too bad.

2. As for the people in L.A., I'm sure there are many ignorant and superficial people here, but I'm a believer that you choose who you hang out with. I've met so many interesting and smart people here.

3. The weather is not overrated. It's just that people get used to it and take it for granted (e.g. people complain when it's below 70 degrees).

Posted by John Y Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 1:12 PM

comment #32

Wrecktum Author Profile Page says ...

"Don't you have any complaints about living in the City of Angels or is it just heaven on Earth for you?"

Living in L.A. is like getting a 24/7 b.j.

Posted by Wrecktum Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 1:15 PM

comment #33

Jeffrey Kunze Author Profile Page says ...

Your a pretty sarcastic bastard.

Posted by Jeffrey Kunze Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 1:22 PM

comment #34

christian Author Profile Page says ...

"Living in L.A. is like getting a 24/7 b.j."

From a Santa Monica Blvd hooker.

Posted by christian Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 1:24 PM

comment #35

Wrecktum Author Profile Page says ...

"Your a pretty sarcastic bastard."

Yes sir.

"From a Santa Monica Blvd hooker."

Yes sir.

Posted by Wrecktum Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 1:41 PM

comment #36

actionman Author Profile Page says ...

Kunze....from West Hartford, born and raised.

Not sure exactly where I will be settling but West Hartford is a possibilty, as is Bristol, Middletown, Rocky Hill, Farmington, and Avon.

Posted by actionman Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 3:13 PM

comment #37

Jeffrey Kunze Author Profile Page says ...

Wow, that's pretty posh. Last time I was in West Hartford to visit some friends we drove around the ridiculously ornate houses smoking a large blunt. Maybe it was the headies, but every single house seemed like a mansion right outta the end of TWBB.

I actually just graduated from Quinnipiac U in Hamden. Currently interning at Sikorsky Aircraft writing for their newletters and marketing materials.

What do you think your gonna be doing back in CT.

By the way, I looked at your rating for the movies you've seen in 2008 so far and you know what I'm gonna say. How could you have given like at least four 4-star ratings and it just turned April. Come on. 4-star ratings arn't something you just through out there! That has to be reserved for the top-of-the-top.

Bout to pop in Into the Valley of Elah. Haven't seen any of the recent Iraq movies yet, so this is gonna be interesting. I have high hopes though......

Posted by Jeffrey Kunze Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 5:07 PM

comment #38

D.Z. Author Profile Page says ...

Aris: "DZ - i disagree; i think there are tons of attractive women here. "

Those aren't women. The ones who are usually take 2-3 hours of bad traffic to meet for a date. By that time, they've already dumped you, cheated on you, and/or eloped to better pastures.

actionman: "Oh yeah, the women are hot (but mostly retarded) "

I personally find them to be average, but smart enough to
be high-maintenance, since they know there'll be more gang-fights over them than if they lived elsewhere.

Phreek: My faves include All American Burger and Fat Burger. But regardless of how they are now, In N Out's fries were always overrated and disgusting.

christian: "And the first words out of my mouth this morning was to a Ashton Kucher-esque hipster in my hood who nearly ran me over in his car while on the cell phone."

I like how Arnie gave people who drive while using cell phones a three year start to kill people before the practice becomes illegal. [Driving with cell phones, not hit-and-runs. Although I dread the day our local legislators become so stupid, that they consider legalizing the latter thing.] NYC banned using cell phones while driving the minute people started getting into accidents, and it's almost a decade since we caught up. What happened to us being the "progressive" state?

John: "There are many alternatives that are much less crowded. That's the thing - there's a lot of traffic in L.A., but if you know your way around the city, it's never too bad."

Well, in theory, yes. But then you have to take into account potential construction jobs and pile-ups which can make your trip even *longer* than if you had been stuck in the rush hour lane. Oh, and then there's the wonder of not being able to go back to where you started, because the road you take goes straight into a freeway.

"As for the people in L.A., I'm sure there are many ignorant and superficial people here, but I'm a believer that you choose who you hang out with."

You choose it in other places. Here, they just breed and surround you like flies.

"The weather is not overrated. It's just that people get used to it and take it for granted (e.g. people complain when it's below 70 degrees)."

I complain when it's over 100 degrees. That's not warm and sunny, just wet and muggy.

Posted by D.Z. Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 5:19 PM

comment #39

Craptastic Author Profile Page says ...

Wow. CT is in da house here! Was born and raised in Waterbury myself. Been in L.A. for about 12 years.

Should we start a club?

Posted by Craptastic Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 5:40 PM

comment #40

actionman Author Profile Page says ...

I have met a lot of people from CT, MA, and of course, NY, during my time out here.

Lots of CT license plates driving around this city....so weird....

Posted by actionman Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 5:44 PM

comment #41

John Y Author Profile Page says ...

I'm not sure which L.A. you live in, but temperatures over 100 F rarely ever happen.

In 2007, it happened once, on Sept. 2 (source: wunderground.com). So, yes, poor you, you had to suffer one day of the year with 100+ weather.

Posted by John Y Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 5:48 PM

comment #42

Arran Author Profile Page says ...

I live in New Zealand.

I'm staying here.

Posted by Arran Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 5:56 PM

comment #43

D.Z. Author Profile Page says ...

John: It was over 100F every other week last summer, actually. Hence those forest fires...

Posted by D.Z. Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 6:01 PM

comment #44

John Y Author Profile Page says ...

D.Z., look it up. It wasn't.

The forest fires occurred because it was dry, and many of them were caused by arson.

Posted by John Y Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 7:29 PM

comment #45

D.Z. Author Profile Page says ...

Oh, well. It didn't feel much different either way.

Posted by D.Z. Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 7:40 PM

comment #46

frankbooth Author Profile Page says ...

"Because Blade Runner sucks and Star Trek is cool."

That's the other thing about LA. Too much sun can totally fry your brain.

Posted by frankbooth Author Profile Page at April 10, 2008 11:28 PM

comment #47

Jane Doe Author Profile Page says ...

My wife and I left L.A. one year ago. We hated the traffic, the massive amount of people and the insane cost of rent.


Now, after living in the midwest for a year, all we talk about is wanting to go back. It's like "Oh yeah, that's why we left in the first place. Because it's boring here and the weather is horrendous."


It's mid April and right now it's SNOWING. The high today is 36. To reiterate - it's the middle of APRIL. Today in Los Angeles it's going to be 83.


I totally took Southern California for granted. I mean, imagine being able to GO OUTSIDE not just during May through September, but also in October through April! Wow, how about that!


There's a reason that there's so many people live in Southern California and it's so damn expensive...

BECAUSE IT'S NICE.

Posted by Jane Doe Author Profile Page at April 11, 2008 8:45 AM

comment #48

D.Z. Author Profile Page says ...

Jane: "I totally took Southern California for granted. I mean, imagine being able to GO OUTSIDE not just during May through September, but also in October through April!"

Yes, but there's nothing to go outside to in L.A.

Posted by D.Z. Author Profile Page at April 11, 2008 2:02 PM

comment #49

Wrecktum Author Profile Page says ...

"Yes, but there's nothing to go outside to in L.A."

It's comments like this (snarky, obviously false, blithering) that force me to respond in the manner I do on this subject.

Posted by Wrecktum Author Profile Page at April 11, 2008 2:26 PM

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