comment #1

siamesecat says ...

Erm, I think it's an Angry Aussie.

comment #2

symscovington says ...

He's Australian. Not all Aussies talk like Nicole Manchild, or Steve Irwin. Come on, Jeff.

comment #3

Leonardcoenbrothers says ...

I believe he had recently ingested some sort of recreational drugs. He's funny, though. Maybe he could be Indy's sidekick in the next movie. I'd pay to see that.

comment #4

Stephe96 says ...

The funny thing is he's not really doing the movie justice: it's actually WORSE than he's making it out to be! The motorcycle chase through the library? The one that ends with a student stupidly asking Indy about some homework assignment...and then Indy actually ANSWERING HIM AS IF NOTHING JUST HAPPENED AND HE'S NOT IN GRAVE DANGER OF BEING KILLED?!?!!? That little 'joke' fell flat like I couldn't believe, and was pretty much the moment I realized 'Crystal Skull' had Jumped The Shark and was irretrievably beyond any salvation. My God, what a terrible, terrible movie.

comment #5

Richard_Stone says ...

"This is Indiana Jones, not some fucking fantasy bullshit!"

comment #6

Spacesheik says ...

I'm a huge INDIANA JONES fan and waited 19 years for this, I was dissapointed, the grit, the rousing atmosphere, the plotting, all were limp - even the John Williams score seems subdued, many scenes did not even have *any* music at all, just talky exposition and bland static camera angles - this is one of Spielberg's laziest films.

I loved the 50s cold war motif, the doomtown sequence, and to an extent the opening of the flick, but I agree with the dude in the video, Indy was a victim of bad plotting, anyone who has taken screenwriting 101 would have never written a main principal who just goes through the motions and does not even challenge the villain's authority (no wonder Indy got blacklisted in the flick), the Tarzan sequence was terrible, the jeep chase was ruined by slapsticky violence, the only sequence that came close to living up to the grave morbidity of some of the earlier sequences in the other flicks was the giant ants sequence - and even that was very MUMMY-like.

The climax of the film was - I had suspected months ago from watching the trailer - ITS A MAD MAD MAD WORLD with Indy and FIVE sidekicks running around a temple with Indy doing absolutely *nothing* to further to story, he was a fucking *observer* to all the proceedings - that to me was unforgivable.

This is one weak sequel, very choppy, badly plotted and lacking in tension or adventure, it was a passable NATIONAL ADVENTURE flick in Indy clothing.

But we waited 19 years for this? For a movie that opens with 'hound dog' on the soundtrack and a shot of the CADDYSHACK beaver on a Paramount shaped little molehill? From then on we shoulda known there would be little dramatic weight to the proceedings.

I disliked LAST CRUSADE but at least that had a great John Williams score, a moving father-son storyline (unlike this one) and a weighty archealogical theme, not to mention a kick-arse opening with River Phoenix as a young Indy.

Make no mistake this one is the worst in the series. And I really, really wanted to love this film.

They shoulda made the Frank Darabont version, whatever that was, it would have been miles better than this flick.

comment #7

MiraJeffAICN says ...

Hilarious! Sounds awful. But here's the thing... when will someone have the balls to go on YouTube and admit that the entire series is utterly ridiculous? That's right Mr. Indiana Jones fan. Maybe you wouldn't have been so disappointed if you had the sense to recognize that the entire franchise is preposterous. I watched it for the first time this week with a very open mind and thought it was laughably dated. Fuck Indiana Jones and its apologists. Shit's weak. And for what it's worth (12 bucks to the box office bean counters) I will NOT be seeing the new one. Personally I find it said that the whole country has been waiting for this movie for 20 years. Paramount should've resurrected the Wayne's World franchise over this pathetically corny excuse for edge of your seat entertainment. Raiders was a worse Best Picture nominee than even Juno. Yeah, I said it. Bring it on!

comment #8

MiraJeffAICN says ...

I find it sad... not said.

comment #9

Richard_Stone says ...

I'm giving up after 2 minutes in the second part, this guy's not very insightful.

You have to be in the mood for mindless entertainment to appreciate all four Indiana Jones pictures. Neither of them really hold to much scrutiny if you examine the plot in details. You have to watch them with a child's eyes.

Indy 4's macguffin fits well with the previous trilogy in my estimation. The flaws are in the execution (my biggest grips are the ugly cinematography, the seemingly anachronistic set designs and Karen Allen's acting).

I wish Lucas would go out and create something new, but maybe he's spoiled for good now.

I watched a Martin Scorsese movie class on DVD and he pointed out that in westerns directed by John Ford decades apart, you could see much evolution, personal, technical and cultural. It would be cool if we could say the same about Indy 4, 19 years after the conclusion of the original trilogy.

comment #10

Ray says ...

Jeff, I really can't believe you're giving this movie a "pass." It's truly a terrible film, easily the worst of Spielberg's career.

The alien motif in this film is brilliant. However, the execution of the entire thing is awful nearly from the beginning. Psychic CGI monkeys? CADDYSHACK gophers as comic relief during a chase?

Lucas has nothing left in the tank except childishness; he was actually more mature in all respects when he was a 25 year old. Now he relishes farts and people stepping in shit and absolutely unbelieveable, cartoony action. It's hard to believe the guy is almost 70 years old.

Anyway, I cannot believe you're accepting this movie as anything close to alright. Hopefully it has nothing to do with the giant banner ads all over your site.

comment #11

fielding says ...

Why is everyone surprised about this? Spielberg's last truly great film was The Color Purple, and Lucas lost it with Return of the Jedi. Indy 4 was always going to be a disaster.

Bring on The Dark Knight.

comment #12

K. Bowen says ...

I sense a real backlash against the film starting. At least among the more hardcore film watchers. I"m sure it will do fine with hopeless fanboys and maybe the average moviegoer. But for the ones who really care about movies .... I just don't sense a lot of positivity.

comment #13

Feathers McGraw says ...

And with every post he makes, MiraJeff makes me wish Uwe Boll had hit him even harder. Truly the retarded cousin of the AICN crew, and that's saying something.

comment #14

The Winchester says ...

Shia LeBouf summons his monkey minions to help him swing to safety. At that point, I began to suspect that this movie would be worse than Pirates 2.

Speaking of which, for a good take on that film,here you go: http://youtube.com/watch?v=IK8SsHV3yLs

(And the dude's an Aussie, not a Brit)

comment #15

MathewM says ...

The movie is fine. I turned off the Aussie film geek after a couple of minutes because he's acting like he's drunk.

Here's the deal with KOTCS-- it works when it's stupid fun. The action scenes are coherent, slapsticky and entertaining. The exposition scenes are clunky as is normal for Spielberg. He hates shooting exposition, has admitted as much and it shows. He should of brought in a different director to shoot these scenes. Neither Spielberg or Lucas can shoot exposition scenes worth a damn.

Anyway I kind of dug the whole alien artifact thing. It's a very interesting mythos that hasn't been touched upon by the series until now. I haven't seen any reviews indicating this but the crazy John Hurt character seems to be inspired by psychedelic pioneer Terrence McKenna. If you've read any of McKenna's stuff about his ingesting psychedelic drugs in the Amazon and seeing space aliens you'll know what I'm talking about.

comment #16

Rothchild says ...

MiraJeff:

You're a sad little man. You're really not going to find many allies on planet earth. If you prefer Crash to any of the Indy movies...

comment #17

Mark B says ...

Well, it was worth seeing for the BENJAMIN BUTTON trailer, anyway. Now THAT looks like a movie!

comment #18

lazarus says ...

Pretty presumptuous, Ray. I'm sure that Lucas is responsible for a lot of the crap in this film, but Spielberg isn't to blame at all? For anything?

For what it's worth, I imagine it was Lucas's idea to bring it into the atomic age, and make the plot a connection between Roswell and aliens in ancienc South America. It wasn't a bad one, even if the script itself wasn't great.

comment #19

Jeffrey Kunze says ...

MiraJeff is a jackass. I'm honestly ashamed to share the same name as him. How has he not encountered the Indiana Jones series until now? What is he, all of 15-years-old, hiding behind his computer? I've never visited the AICN website and now I most certainly never, ever will.

The original trilogy feels like an actually trilogy, as in you can watch them all one after the other and it feels as though you're watching one long epic adventures movie. Most trilogies nowadays no longer feel like this.

Indy IV feels like the "retarded cousin" of the original trilogy, much in the same way somebody earlier in this thread refered to young MiraJeff, quite accurately.

comment #20

Craptastic says ...

Everyone involved with the script is to blame for this disaster. Spielberg, Lucas and, most of all, David Koepp. I don't know if he has the same kind of mind-warping powers the skull had but I'm starting to suspect that he does.

I simply do not understand how anyone could've thought that script was THE ONE. The solid, bullet proof one they claimed to be waiting for.

The "Mac" and "Ox" characters were pointless, Marion was given nothing to do, Indy rode bitch half the time and Cate was given nothing to do except give her best Natasha impersonation.

There was ZERO sense of danger or suspense outside of the opening sequence (though even some of that was sketchy) and the big reveal at the end was a major let-down. I had no problem with aliens being involved (unlike naysayers, I believe it fits right in with the series) but couldn't Koepp come up with something else other than the ending to "Mission To Mars"?

There WERE parts where I was entertained (the opening, the malt shop and motorcycle seqences) and had a goofy grin on my face but the problems certainly outweigh the good.

On a technical note: did anyone else notice how BAD the dialogue looping was during the opening sequence?

Uhhhggg.... the whole thing felt like it was rushed and not cared for in the least bit.

comment #21

Jeffrey Kunze says ...

Did anyone notice Cate Blanchett's spotty accent in the opening warehouse scene? It sounds as though she didn't quite have it down at first and then it improved as the film went on (and she was more comfortable with the accent).

As much as I admire her as an actress, she was a letdown and given not much to do.

comment #22

MiraJeffAICN says ...

Feathers McGraw - I am actually retarded so you should be ashamed of yourself.

Rothchild - Crash rules. That's why it has a Best Picture statue and Indiana Jones doesn't. Crash is about real life. Indiana Jones is bullshit escapism. Maybe if I had a sad little life like yourself I would need to escape more often from it.

Kunze - I'm 24 and I believe I had seen the trilogy as a little kid but I didn't remember anything about it so I gave it another chance, a fresh start, to view the film through a seasoned moviegoer's eyes, and it didn't hold up. I'm not your typical movie fan. I HATE most classics. There are a small handful of films I genuinely enjoy pre-1970. That shit from the golden age of cinema doesn't hold up for me. It feels fake, and I know it didn't at the time, but having seen what I've seen, how can I be asked to believe shit that looks staged and hokey? The acting is stilted, the dialogue corny and the stunts look like just that. And Kunze, if you've never been to AICN then you, my friend, are the retarded one. I'll probably come back to this site in 20 years if Jeff is still around then and you'll probably still be posting here in the talkbacks.

I'm off to go interview Angelina Jolie for Wanted. Have a super weekend!

comment #23

Jeffrey Kunze says ...

"Indiana Jones is bullshit escapism."

And what is Wanted exactly, a film about "real life." Because for a second there I thought you were mentioning a summer popcorn tentpole in which "the acting is stilted, the dialogue corny and the stunts look like just that".

Tell Angelina if she's adopts another baby everything wrong in the world will magically turn right and remind her to stay away from the H.

comment #24

Craptastic says ...

MiraJeff, you're starting to show your age. Calm down, please.

comment #25

actionman says ...

Just got back from Indy 4. Loved it. Not perfect and I have a few issues but overall I was supremely entertained. Loved the alien stuff and really liked seeing Ford as Indy again. Blanchett was a lot of fun too. Shia's a cool cat. Not perfect, and last in the series, but loved it nonetheless.

comment #26

televisiontears says ...

Jeepers. I always knew MiraJeff was pretty much an ass (no offense, some of my best friends are asses). But jeepers.

I first took note of said assery when he posted a mild hint of a spoiler for the Wire finale over at his prestigious AICN ("you, my friend, are the retarded one"). The "Talkbackers" freaked, and his response was something to the extent of "You're lucky I don't spoil the whole finale for you douchebags!" Classy.

I'll let the "handful of films I genuinely enjoy pre 1970" comment and the Angelina Jolie fanboy-obsession-masquerading-as-journalistic-oneupsmanship speak for themselves.

I'm starting to regret writing this. I promise I'm not what some refer to as a "troll". It's too nice outside for this shit.

comment #27

D.Z. says ...

MiraJeff: "That's right Mr. Indiana Jones fan. Maybe you wouldn't have been so disappointed if you had the sense to recognize that the entire franchise is preposterous."

Yes, but it was preposterous in a believable way.

"And for what it's worth (12 bucks to the box office bean counters)"

It's called matinee prices at City Walk and the Grove. Take advantage of them.

"Paramount should've resurrected the Wayne's World franchise over this pathetically corny excuse for edge of your seat entertainment."

They already did, and that's why it's not a franchise.

"Rothchild - Crash rules. That's why it has a Best Picture statue and Indiana Jones doesn't."

So by your logic, Citizen Kane sucks.

"Crash is about real life."

No, Boyz N the Hood is about real life. Crash is an R-rated "We are the World".

"I'm not your typical movie fan. I HATE most classics. There are a small handful of films I genuinely enjoy pre-1970. That shit from the golden age of cinema doesn't hold up for me. It feels fake, and I know it didn't at the time, but having seen what I've seen, how can I be asked to believe shit that looks staged and hokey?"

I'll admit there are some older films which don't grab me, either. [*cough* All About Eve *cough* ] But I'm not going to be a snob, and not see them, just because of their age.

comment #28

Rothchild says ...

You're right, MiraJeff. I have a sad little life. I wish I was the worst writer to ever grace AICN. I wish I was so insecure that I'd need to tag "AICN" onto my online handle. I wish I didn't know how to use the enter key. I wish I had horrible taste in movies. I wish Uwe Boll kicked my ass.

I wish I didn't know how or when to shut the fuck up.

comment #29

Ogami Itto says ...

I think that angry Brit/Aussie/Pussy needs to go get laid. Who wastes his time analysing this shit?

comment #30

Seal Pup says ...

Much as watching MiraJeff get ripped to pieces like a piece of raw meat in a lions enclosure is admittedly pretty amusing, I fear it's exactly what he wanted.

comment #31

Adonis says ...

I feel dumber for having seen this.

The worst scene in a god awful movie? Karen Allen intentionally drives off a cliff, the jeep drops 50 feet and then hits a massive tree that gently lowers it down... the only tree coming off the rockface. She's never been there. She's smiling throughout. They aren't wearing seatbelts, but never fall out. They smack into a perfectly placed tree, which "catches" the jeep and lowers it down. Again, she drives... off... a... cliff, hitting squarely in some random tree below, while smiling.

Quite possibly the worst movie I will see this year...

comment #32

Adonis says ...

And yes, this guy's accent is obviously Australian... For a "worldly" guy, sometimes Wells is...well, not very worldly.

comment #33

moviemaniac2002 says ...

What many people expected after 19 years
was an "ultimate" Indiana Jones film, an
awe-inspiring experience that would lift our
souls into Indy heaven. And given the amount
of scripts that Lucas and Speilberg commissioned and then rejected, we all had good reason to
believe that an "ultimate Indy" was what they
were after too.
But what they ultimately deliver....is a
'just okay-fairly good" Inidiana Jones adventure.
a disposable multii-plex summer toy, quickly
enjoyed and easily forgotten. They carefully
routinely follow their own blueprints from the
previous three films...like car manufacturers putting out a modified version of last year's model
...same paint job, same features, just runs a
little slower. (I had the same feeling as a young
man when I excitedly sat down to watch Sean
Connery in "You Only Live Twice"...and then
could see that the Bond films weren't going to
get any better...the formula was frozen, except
for the actors who were getting older and less
mobile.)
So we did expect better, at least from
Speilberg (not so much Lucas, who has devolved
into a CGI cost accountant, perfectly happy with
lazy acting and imcomrehensible plotting)
Did I have fun watching it? Absolutely. Will I buy the DVD? You bet. Should this film have been
better than it is, given the creative participants and its 19 year birthing process? Hell, yeh.