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Boll Rant
Postal director Uwe Boll, angry at journalists for not paying attention to the fact that his film Postal is opening on very few screens as well as Boll's suggested reason for this (i.e., political censorship), has written the following:
"You are all not getting that I'm the guy who made it against the big Hollywood system and you are all busy trying to destroy me and finish me up, and [from this] you've won what? The attention of the studios, Michael Bay...?? If you damage me you feel closer to Hollywood? What is your game plan?
"If you want [to see] only movies like Jumper, Speed Racer, What Happens in Vegas, then keep going and your dreams will be fullfilled. Postal makes some very important points, but you don't wanna see that. That Bush used 9.11 to start a war against a country what had nothing to do with Bin Laden, etc., but none of this matters because you're all busy thinking that Indiana Jones or Narnia are important movies.
"In reality real they are empty shells of an industry what wants to make money and what wants to keep you looking "escape movies" with nothing in it. in between they are putting some controversial movies to show that they can do also important movies, but ones that are not really critica. They only supporting the system and not showing the "big picture," which Postal does. It nails the absurd situation with all the stupid religions, races and nations we are living [among].
"Postal is not accepting bullshit politics. Postal has not the opinion that Bush made mistakes -- it has the opinion that it is a scandal that Bush is not in jail. What's happened in America over the last seven years is the biggest joke since Columbus stepped on that land."
Posted by Jeffrey Wells on May 17, 2008 at 2:41 AM
comment #1
markj
says ...
Dear Uwe,
Indiana Jones is an important movie.
Love,
Mark
Posted by markj
at May 17, 2008 3:13 AM
comment #2
Mgmax
says ...
Dear Uwe,
I'd rather see the German comedy with Bush in clown makeup. It looks subtler than yours.
yrs,
Mgmax
Posted by Mgmax
at May 17, 2008 4:44 AM
comment #3
PerfectTommy
says ...
Dear Uwe,
I wish I could make time for "Postal", but I'm writing my thesis on other important films: BLOODRAYNE and BLOODRAYNE II: THE DELIVERANCE. I hope I finish it before the third BLOODRAYNE comes out. (Tell me, sir, will the third film's title have a semi colon as well?)
Ever most sincerely,
PT
Posted by PerfectTommy
at May 17, 2008 5:05 AM
comment #4
swordandpen
says ...
Dear Uwe,
Doing the whole "independent filmmaker standing up against the Hollywood system" routine works better when you actually make good movies.
Sincerely,
SS
Posted by swordandpen
at May 17, 2008 5:40 AM
comment #5
Undercover Brother
says ...
Dear Uwe,
You are furthering the thought that you are in fact not only deluded beyond reason, but quite possibly retarded. Based on your previous work, and this asinine letter, I'm stunned you know which direction to point the camera. Actually, considering your films, pointing the camera at something other than the actors would probbaly be an improvement. Give that a try.
Your Friend and fellow Bush loather,
UB
Posted by Undercover Brother
at May 17, 2008 6:32 AM
comment #6
Zoidberg
says ...
I support Uwe Boll's continued presence in the film industry strictly because I like the idea of there being a sort of modern day Ed Wood running around out there.
I hope he makes a thousand more shitty movies!
Posted by Zoidberg
at May 17, 2008 9:56 AM
comment #7
Craptastic
says ...
I kind of wish Hollywood would bite and play along with one of his silly little games just to show him what a hack he is. Something like: Give him talented actors, a good script and an averge budget.... but if the film doesn't make 75 million dollars he has to quit making movies for the rest of his life.
Shit. I think I just gave the good Doctor his next press whore scam.
Posted by Craptastic
at May 17, 2008 10:24 AM
comment #8
LYT
says ...
"Give him talented actors, a good script and an average budget"
He often uses talented actors, just in completely inappropriate roles. And In the Name of the King had a $60 million budget.
Boll will tell you it was a better movie than Eragon or Dungeons and Dragons. I'm not sure I can disagree with that.
Posted by LYT
at May 17, 2008 11:15 AM
comment #9
Goulet
says ...
Even though I expect it to suck, I contacted the Canadian distributor about opportunities to review POSTAL for the Montreal alt-weekly I work for, and they're not screening it for critics.
I don't know if the situation is the same in the US but if so, how can you complain about critics not supporting your movie if you won't even show it to them!
Posted by Goulet
at May 17, 2008 11:52 AM
comment #10
MiraJeffAICN
says ...
Uwe loves to play the underdog card and claim he's an independent filmmaker because he doesn't work with the Hollywood studios but he gets a ton of money and he makes shit with it. I think Uwe is a decent producer and shrewd businessman. He knows how to find a good deal and how he manages to convince B and C-list actors to appear in his movies is beyond me, but hat's off to the guy. And Postal does make one or two worthwhile political points. But it is far from an important film and it doesn't deserve any more press because its director insists on acting like a child. Just because you're not afraid to use the media to communicate with your critics and fans doesn't make it a good idea. A little self-censorship would go a long way, if only Uwe could stand to let his films speak for themselves.
Posted by MiraJeffAICN
at May 17, 2008 3:11 PM
comment #11
LYT
says ...
I'd like to see Uwe be the subject of the next Project Greenlight. I have a feeling it would be amazing.
Posted by LYT
at May 17, 2008 5:06 PM
comment #12
Legowombat
says ...
Zoidberg: I understand the Ed Wood comparison. I was snoozing my way through 'House Of The Dead', when it suddenly exploded into this incredible 10 minute sequence where the characters try to reach the house of the title.
It featured:
- everyone magically developing firearm skills;
- incomprehensible editing where you can't follow the line of action from shot to shot;
- every one of the 10 characters getting a Bullet Time moment;
- character deaths depicted by a frozen tabluea with a full 360 circling camera and red wipe;
- big, chunky, heavilly-pixelated inserts of the original video game;
- and for some reason, a recap of the entire movie, in gradually increasing speedy cuts, until they become a blur.
It's patently *insane*, but in a creative way, and as such it's some kind of bravura triumph of outsider art, even as it fails so disasterously. At least it made me sit up and pay attention, which is more than can be said for last 10 minutes of 'Transformers', which was the same messy blur without the fun. I can see Boll's confusion here.
'Alone In The Dark' features more Outsider Art goodness, but after that, 'Bloodrayne' was just run-of-the-mill ignorably bad, rather than creatively bad.
I'm hoping 'Postal' and 'In The Name Of The King' bring back the WTF? goodness. I mean, could they really be any worse than Guy Ritchie's 'Revolver'?
Posted by Legowombat
at May 17, 2008 8:58 PM
comment #13
Craptastic
says ...
LYT, that idea is fucking genius! I'd watch that in a heartbeat.
Posted by Craptastic
at May 17, 2008 10:56 PM
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