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The price of drinks over the last ten or so years has risen to obscene levels at almost all nightspots. At many places you can easily drop $40 or $50 bucks on three or four glasses of wine, with tip and all. Even beer is ridiculous. Forget mixed drinks. So imagine my shock when I happened to wander into Barney's Beanery last night and ordered a Miller Chill and the bartender held two fingers up. "Two dollars?," I said. "Two," she said. Astonishing.
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Posted by Jeffrey Wells on July 22, 2008 at 1:58 PM
comment #1
Josh Massey says ...
Yeah, but then you had to drink a Miller Chill.
Posted by Josh Massey at July 22, 2008 2:10 PM
comment #2
corey3rd says ...
JWW
I think that $2 beer was the one that I ordered back in 1997. I guess it finally got to the table.
Posted by corey3rd at July 22, 2008 2:12 PM
comment #3
Michael says ...
How much was the Zima chaser?
Posted by Michael at July 22, 2008 2:17 PM
comment #4
silver says ...
Get your kicks on Route 66
Posted by silver at July 22, 2008 2:18 PM
comment #5
MarkVH says ...
Seriously, Wells, Miller Chill? You're constantly lecturing folks on what's hip, clever, etc. and giving advice on why its impossible to reconcile loving both golf and film and next you're admitting to ordering a Miller Chill?
At least after I finish a round I drink a freakin' BEER, not a girly half-beer. Why not just order a wine cooler and get it over with? Oy.
Posted by MarkVH at July 22, 2008 2:30 PM
comment #6
Rich S. says ...
I'm surprised she only offered you $2 to drink that swill. I don't think I could choke it down for less than five.
Posted by Rich S. at July 22, 2008 2:36 PM
comment #7
gruver1 says ...
Wells to MarkVH: Because I like the taste, all right? Is that allowable or do I need permission from the Int'l Society of Macho Beerheads? Tequiza, Desperado (in Europe), Miller Chill...love that lime-flavored/guave thing. It's not "beer" but it's really quite tasty.
Posted by gruver1 at July 22, 2008 2:38 PM
comment #8
Barracuda says ...
Looks like an awesome room. Nothing like that here in Boston any more. Alas.
But yeah, next time order a beer.
Posted by Barracuda at July 22, 2008 2:39 PM
comment #9
Richardson says ...
Drinking Miller Chill? How galumph.
Posted by Richardson at July 22, 2008 2:39 PM
comment #10
Mark says ...
Cost of Miller Chill: $2.
Respect lost from HE readers: priceless.
Ta Da! Did i win the needlessly-piss-on-Jeff-for-sharing-a-small-sidestory contest?
Posted by Mark at July 22, 2008 2:44 PM
comment #11
gruver1 says ...
Wells to Pissheads: Your obsession with needing to display your conventional barroom machismo is quite telling. Real beer for real men, eh? Grrrrr! You're looking to compensate for something else, guys.
Posted by gruver1 at July 22, 2008 2:48 PM
comment #12
Arran says ...
Christ guys, it's not like he ordered a virgin pina colada with a little pink umbrella in it, or declared that he was "a fiend for mojitos".
Posted by Arran at July 22, 2008 2:49 PM
comment #13
Richardson says ...
"Is that allowable or do I need permission from the Int'l Society of Macho Beerheads?"
It has *nothing* do with being Macho, and everything to do with it being an odd exception to your obsession with hipness and not being like a galumph. How much were their cans of Budweiser?
Posted by Richardson at July 22, 2008 2:53 PM
comment #14
drgogol says ...
Wells defends self twice = knows he's wrong
Posted by drgogol at July 22, 2008 2:53 PM
comment #15
LYT says ...
The secret antidote to high bar prices is to find good happy hours -- some bars in OC even have two separate happy hours: the standard early one, and then a late-night one.
Beers are affordable then.
It's fine to drink stuff that isn't particularly good because you like the taste. Everyone in Hollywood drinks Diet Coke -- it tastes like chemicals, but after a while those chemicals become tasty.
Posted by LYT at July 22, 2008 2:57 PM
comment #16
Richardson says ...
"You're looking to compensate for something else, guys."
Well, if you didn't get so defensive whenever anybody made the tiniest bit of fun of you, it wouldn't be so much fun to make fun of you.
Posted by Richardson at July 22, 2008 2:58 PM
comment #17
chappiesan says ...
I'd' join in on the fun but last night I went to the Kennedy School in Portland, Oregon and ordered a Butterscotch Express. Sunded like something Owen Wilson mgiht drink. And, it definitely tasted better than the beers they serve, which are all variants on the same stale duckbutter formula.
Posted by chappiesan at July 22, 2008 3:00 PM
comment #18
TheJeff says ...
It doesn't have anything to do with "real men drink real beer machismo." Miller Chill is just so...low thread count. It's like drinking box wine. It's nothing to do with not being "manly." Now if you were drinking lemonade and vodka or something...
Posted by TheJeff at July 22, 2008 3:00 PM
comment #19
Celebrity Werewolf Hunter says ...
I wouldn't call him out for liking something less macho, but Arran has got it right. That is just a bad beer, are you drinking McCormicks Vodka too, I'd just expect a beer with a little more character from a man who prides himself on his impeccable tastes. Although if we were talking about his seventh or eighth beer of the night, I guess taste is neglible and price is king.
I nearly jump for joy when I find a Stella or Corona under 5 dollars, even trendy dive bars are charging 6 a bottle. (which is exactly what it costs for a 6 pack at Ralphs for the same beer)
Posted by Celebrity Werewolf Hunter at July 22, 2008 3:02 PM
comment #20
bmcintire says ...
Jeff - I am guessing the $2 beer had more to do with the fact that you were in there on a Monday, though I can't be certain. After one miserable experience in that dump, I have opted never to repeat it.
The whole "Faggots Stay Out" backstory iced that cake.
Posted by bmcintire at July 22, 2008 3:07 PM
comment #21
CinemaPhreek says ...
Dude, if you paid ONLY $2 for a beer in LA, you should shut up and try not to sound like your grandfather. Especially in a place like the Beanery. Most places in LA are charging like $4-5, even for domestic piss-water like Bud.
When ever I go back to my very middle American East coast hometown, I want to cry over all the kick ass places you can get a great beer for cheap from (check out the Flying Saucer places if you find yourself near one - always have a daily special on a mircobrew).
Posted by CinemaPhreek at July 22, 2008 3:08 PM
comment #22
corey3rd says ...
They outlawed Happy Hour in North Carolina.
Posted by corey3rd at July 22, 2008 3:09 PM
comment #23
supertaster says ...
Jeff , I think what the guys on here are trying to say is that the next stop after drinking a Miller Chill is Walmart to pick up a few low thread-count , collared, short-sleeve plaid shirts. That's what "the rubes" do.
Posted by supertaster at July 22, 2008 3:14 PM
comment #24
NotImpressedYet says ...
Much like wearing pleated jeans or shoes with tassles, the presence of a Miller Chill in some dude's hand creates a rebuttable presumption that he's a complete douchebag. Of course this rule of thumb of course has exceptions, of which I'm reasonably sure Wells is one.
Posted by NotImpressedYet at July 22, 2008 3:25 PM
comment #25
bents75 says ...
"That's what "the rubes" do."
I wouldn't even classify MIller Chill as being even remotely rube like - it's arguably a little....risque, but you can't disrespect the mother of all "rube" drinks - the one, the only, the worst tasting product avalable - Budweiser.
Things could certainly be worse for Wells.
I fear no reprisal.
Posted by bents75 at July 22, 2008 3:42 PM
comment #26
chappiesan says ...
Yeah, at least he's not sucking down Pabst Blue Ribbon, Natty light, or Lonestar. If that were the case, I'd be finding a new blog to read.
Posted by chappiesan at July 22, 2008 3:45 PM
comment #27
BlueRaymondBabbit says ...
Heads up, Wells! That chick with the pitcher is TOTALLY CHECKING YOU OUT, man.
Posted by BlueRaymondBabbit at July 22, 2008 3:54 PM
comment #28
lazarus says ...
I won't begrudge Wells the lime beer, as they're pretty refreshing on a hot day. I would have pegged him as a Samuel Adams or Sierra Nevada drinker, something with a "higher hops count", so to speak.
I haven't been to Barney's in years, but I remember them having a pretty great selection of beers, and of course that insane menu with like a million items for whatever mood you're in. The last time I was there was when the Lakers disposed of the Sacramento Kings in a controversial Conference Finals on the way to their third title.
Good times.
Posted by lazarus at July 22, 2008 4:07 PM
comment #29
lazarus says ...
I won't begrudge Wells the lime beer, as they're pretty refreshing on a hot day. I would have pegged him as a Samuel Adams or Sierra Nevada drinker, something with a "higher hops count", so to speak.
I haven't been to Barney's in years, but I remember them having a pretty great selection of beers, and of course that insane menu with like a million items for whatever mood you're in. The last time I was there was when the Lakers disposed of the Sacramento Kings in a controversial Conference Finals on the way to their third title.
Good times.
Posted by lazarus at July 22, 2008 4:07 PM
comment #30
drgogol says ...
"when the Lakers disposed of the Sacramento Kings in a controversial Conference Finals"
Controversial as in "the league told the refs how they wanted the series to go"?
The NBA has as much credibility as Italian soccer.
Posted by drgogol at July 22, 2008 4:58 PM
comment #31
bmcintire says ...
Please note the tasteful Coors lights hanging over each booth. Yes, he could have done much, much worse.
Posted by bmcintire at July 22, 2008 5:28 PM
comment #32
The Bandsaw Vigilante says ...
Come on, when are we going to admit that we're ALL suppressing something in a situation like that (myself included, probably)?
We like our drinks like we like our men -- tall, sweet, and underneath an umbrella.
Posted by The Bandsaw Vigilante at July 22, 2008 5:42 PM
comment #33
cjKennedy says ...
Thanks to everyone for contributing to the best thread in months.
Jeff makes an innocent toss off post about finally finding a cheap drink in LA, gets busted repeatedly for epic unhipness and then petulantly defends himself (without actually understanding why he was being mocked)...twice.
Beautiful.
Posted by cjKennedy at July 22, 2008 6:02 PM
comment #34
ZayTonday says ...
The comments were infinitely more entertaining than the original post.
Legendary thread, as the kids say.
Posted by ZayTonday at July 22, 2008 6:05 PM
comment #35
frankbooth says ...
Watch it, chappiesan!
Posted by frankbooth at July 22, 2008 8:48 PM
comment #36
televisiontears says ...
chappiesan, If you live in the Portland area, Kennedy School is a fun playground atmosphere if you want to get sauced while watching a cheap second-run with shitty projection. But the McMenamin's folks are everywhere, and continue to water down their drinks while jacking up prices.
Try the Monday movie night at The Nest on Alberta and 18th - not too far away from Kennedy School. Drinks are much cheaper, and twice as strong. A few weeks ago they had There Will Be Blood, and the homebrew set up is more solid than you'd expect from a hipster dive bar. The speaker layout leaves a bit to be desired, but hell, the film is free, and you don't need to miss a frame in order to grab another round.
Also, you live in PDX, but denounce PBR? Don't tell anyone! It's frickin' water to these folks.
Posted by televisiontears at July 22, 2008 10:42 PM
comment #37
malibugigolo says ...
What is a miller chill?
Is that Miller Lt.?
American beer on draft very cold is always called for on a Summer Day you can down the whole think in less than thirty seconds.
Posted by malibugigolo at July 22, 2008 10:57 PM
comment #38
malibugigolo says ...
Ok I googled it interesting. Lime in the beer.
I've never been to Arby's or had a Miller Chill I think I'll make it a day of all these things.
Posted by malibugigolo at July 22, 2008 11:00 PM
comment #39
BurmaShave says ...
2 dollars? When did Sascha Baron Cohen start cage fighting?
Posted by BurmaShave at July 23, 2008 12:01 AM
comment #40
chappiesan says ...
televisiontears:
Thanks for the heads up on The Nest. I've been trying to find something that isn't McMenamins for a while. I can deal with the Mission and the Bahgdad because the cinema is decent, and it's the closest thing Portland has to an Alamo Drafthouse (unless you know of another place). But the rest of their joints are too much Johny Cash, Journey, and ass-hat bar who serve up monkey-piss beer and refuse to make anything that isn't on the menu (like a Wisconsin Lunchbox).
But, I may have to reconsider my disdain for PBR. Tuesday nights at my place are devoted to watching shit 80's movies. We just finished Three O'Clock High. Caitlin O'Heaney, the actress who plays the english teacher in the film is a quite the piece. As is tradition whenever I stumble across an underappreciated stunner from an older movie, I run to her imdb to do a little research. Quoted, from her page:
"Her great-great-great grandfather is Jacob Best, founder of Pabst Blue Ribbon Beer."
Quite an odd coincidence given the earlier remark. Their beer still sucks, but there's definitely nothing wrong with the family DNA.
Posted by chappiesan at July 23, 2008 12:43 AM
comment #41
Joe M. says ...
What's with all these bars that show movies?? Here in Philly, it's sports or nothing on the TV's. I'd love to have a handful of bars to choose from where films were shown on the flat screens instead of endless loops of the same sports highlights.
Posted by Joe M. at July 23, 2008 5:51 AM
comment #42
ketut says ...
Pabst Blue Ribbon = poser
Posted by ketut at July 23, 2008 6:56 AM
comment #43
Josh says ...
Figures a lefty would be drinking a Miller Chill. You check for your balls after you ordered?
Posted by Josh at July 23, 2008 7:48 AM
comment #44
JapAdapters says ...
If I feel like having lime in my beer, I order an actual beer and ask for a lime.
What a maroon, falling for that corporate crap.
Posted by JapAdapters at July 23, 2008 9:25 AM
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