edited by Jonathan Doyle

Cloverfield [BLU-RAY] (Paramount Home Entertainment, 6.3.2008) Disguised under deliberately goofy, yet deliciously edible-sounding, aliases such as Cheese and Slusho, Matt Reeves' Cloverfield was produced and rushed into theaters under an equally appetizing shroud of secrecy. From last year's incredibly elusive Super Bowl ad to the film's viral marketing campaign, Cloverfield had everybody scratching their heads and drooling in anticipation. Aside from the as-yet untitled title and the Blair Witch-ian visual style, the film's biggest appeal was the enigmatic creature who was last (un)seen hurling the decapitated head of the Statue of Liberty onto the crowded streets of New York City. All we knew about the mysterious beast was that it was big and angry. Now that the highy-anticipated project has come and gone, one question has fortunately been answered: Cloverfield was a major success. (continued)

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"Mr. [Blankety-blank], we have rules that are not open to interpretation, personal intuition, gut feelings, hairs on the back of your neck, little devils or angels sitting on your shoulder. We're all very well aware of what our orders are and what those orders mean. They come down from our Commander in Chief. They contain no ambiguity. Mr. [Blankety-blank], I've made a decision, I'm captain of this boat, now shut the fuck up!" -- an oft-repeated quote from (a) Run Silent, Run Deep, (b) The Enemy Below, (c) Captain Ron, (d) Two Years Before The Mast, (e) Crimson Tide, (f) Billy Budd.

Road to Claremont<< previous | next >>Jordi Molla

Posted by Jeffrey Wells on August 21, 2008 at 10:35 AM

comment #1

RaRun says ...

Crimson Tide, Gene Hackman talking to Denzel Washington.

Posted by RaRun at August 21, 2008 10:50 AM

comment #2

DarthCorleone says ...

Ah, I was too slow. Yes, Crimson Tide.

Posted by DarthCorleone at August 21, 2008 10:53 AM

comment #3

Rich S. says ...

Okay, he says "fuck," so that lets out (a), (b), (d) and (f). He calls it a "boat," which ordinarily only a captain of a submarine would do. But I don't think Captain Ron had a "ship." I also don't think Captain Ron would take orders from the Commander-in-Chief (and neither would the captains in Two Years Before the Mast or Billy Budd).

So, by process of elimination, I'd go with RaRun and say Crimson Tide.

Posted by Rich S. at August 21, 2008 10:54 AM

comment #4

MoisesChiu says ...

Of course it's Crimson Tide, but your inclusion of Captain Ron reminds me how it's out of print on DVD now and the last time my in-laws visited. My father-in-law said three things related to Captain Ron that I thought were hilarious: 1) Kurt Russell deserved an Academy Award for Captain Ron, 2) as soon as it's out on Blu-ray, I'm paying full price for it, and 3) any video rental store that doesn't have Captain Ron is out of their fuckin' mind.

Posted by MoisesChiu at August 21, 2008 11:15 AM

comment #5

MikeSchaeferSF says ...

So, Hackman is McCain and Denzel is Obama?

Posted by MikeSchaeferSF at August 21, 2008 11:17 AM

comment #6

C-PhreekII says ...

Google took all the fun out of "Name that line" because some douche will cheat. It's only fun in person - and only with something that every guy under 45 doesn't know by heart. That's why I love the return of "Name that theme" because there's no search engine for those.

Also that Poster/letter thing that was up the other day.

Posted by C-PhreekII at August 21, 2008 11:23 AM

comment #7

lazespud says ...

Captain Ron was OK, and it did have one scene that made me laugh out loud. He wore an eye patch in the movie, and at one point other cast members are looking at him staring at them vacantly. They are trying to decide if he's dead because he's not reacting to anything. Then he "wakes up" and switches his eye patch over to his other eye... apparently to sleep, he'd move the patch to cover his good eye, exposing his glass eye...

I just remember being surprised and laughing hard....

Posted by lazespud at August 21, 2008 11:31 AM

comment #8

Sax says ...

Best line in the movie (apparently written by Robert Towne) "Our job is to enforce Democracy -- not practise it."

Posted by Sax at August 21, 2008 11:38 AM

comment #9

thevisceral says ...

Jean Reno had a heart attack.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1047792/Leon-actor-Jean-Reno-rushed-hospital-suffering-massive-heart-attack.html

Posted by thevisceral at August 21, 2008 12:01 PM

comment #10

RDP says ...

From the Jean Reno article:

"Other major films in which he has starred include Léon and The Professional."

Wow. He was in BOTH of those movies?

Posted by RDP at August 21, 2008 12:11 PM

comment #11

C-PhreekII says ...

Anyone else first read that as "Janet Reno?"

If nothing else is a sure sign that there is way too fucking much political shit on here...

Posted by C-PhreekII at August 21, 2008 12:14 PM

comment #12

Yves says ...

Could this be the St. Barts/The Professional curse? Nathalie was photographed topless while vacationing there (certainly bad news for her), and now Reno has a massive heart attack on his vacation. Somebody warn Gary Oldman and Luc Besson to cross the place off their bucket lists.

Posted by Yves at August 21, 2008 12:29 PM

comment #13

nemo says ...

If it weren't for the word "fuck" I would have guessed Humphrey Bogart in The Caine Mutiny.

Posted by nemo at August 21, 2008 1:11 PM

comment #14

actionman says ...

You know, I have seen Crimson TIde probably 100 times but every time it's on HBO, or even cable, I end up watching it, no matter what part of the film I come into it at. It's such a compulsively watchable movie for me.

Posted by actionman at August 21, 2008 1:23 PM

comment #15