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Parental Ego
Can anyone imagine being diseased and sadistic enough to name their just-born child Nakoa-Wolf Manakauapo Namakaeha Momoa? Can anyone imagine the actual child who's been given that name (i.e., a son born to Lisa Bonet) not devising revenge schemes all through elementary school and beyond? "How do you do? My name is Nakoa-Wolf Manakauapo Namakaeha Momoa! Now you're gonna die!"
Posted by Jeffrey Wells on January 8, 2009 at 12:43 PM
comment #1
dangovich
says ...
The first-day-of-school roll call is going to be brutal for this kid.
Posted by dangovich
at January 8, 2009 12:53 PM
comment #2
Rich S.
says ...
Sounds like the fiendish child rearing schemes Steve Martin used to talk about in his stand-up.
Posted by Rich S.
at January 8, 2009 12:59 PM
comment #3
actionman
says ...
That's so fucked up on the part of Lisa Bonet. Wow. What an asshole she is.
Posted by actionman
at January 8, 2009 12:59 PM
comment #4
YRG
says ...
Can't be worse than JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell and Adolf Hitler Campbell. What some people will do for a little attention:
http://www.lehighvalleylive.com/today/index.ssf/2008/12/holland_township_family_angry.html
Posted by YRG
at January 8, 2009 1:05 PM
comment #5
lesterg
says ...
Yeah, but she was cute as hell in the 80's / early 90's.
Posted by lesterg
at January 8, 2009 1:06 PM
comment #6
Ms. M
says ...
Not that I approve of the name, but the baby's dad, Jason Momoa, is Hawaiian, so at least some of the name comes from a genuine cultural/ethnic heritage.
Posted by Ms. M
at January 8, 2009 1:36 PM
comment #7
DeafBrownTrashPunk
says ...
last time I checked, Lisa Bonet is a Rastafarian and that name sounds Rastafarian-ish.
Yeah, it's a long name but so what? It's not that horrible like "Bronx Mowgli Wentz" the poor kid with those awful parents (the guy from Fall Out Boy and his girlfriend, Ass-lee SImpson).
I know many South Indians with long-ass names, but that's a different story.
Posted by DeafBrownTrashPunk
at January 8, 2009 1:36 PM
comment #8
George Prager
says ...
She still hasn't woken up from that coma she fell into during that Donahue appearance with River Phoenix. Is she still breastfeeding her 20 year-old daughter?
Posted by George Prager
at January 8, 2009 1:41 PM
comment #9
nemo
says ...
Sounds more Hawaiian than Rastafarian.
Barack Hussein Obama spent some time growing up in Hawaii. A lot of wingnuts thought his name wasn't American, and a few even talked as if growing up in Hawaii isn't the "real" America either. He's paving the way for President-Elect Nakoa-Wolf Manakauapo Namakaeha Momoa in the year 2056.
Posted by nemo
at January 8, 2009 1:47 PM
comment #10
byanyother
says ...
Ha. Maybe they did it just to drive the press crazy. "Now can I confirm the spelling of the second to middle last name? Namashit?"
Posted by byanyother
at January 8, 2009 1:50 PM
comment #11
Abbey Normal
says ...
Eh, come on...not that bad. I mean, it's not like he'll ever have to actually introduce himself that way unless he wants to. All those names will be on the birth certificate, but he'll likely just drop the middle names (as most of us do) and go by Nakoa Momoa or at worst Nakoa-Wolf Momoa. Those are stil odd, but given the Hawaiian/Rasta influence, it could have been much worse.
Posted by Abbey Normal
at January 8, 2009 1:52 PM
comment #12
MikeSchaeferSF
says ...
I live in SF and work in Oakland; in today's paper there's an interview with a guy named (I swear) Mandingo Hayes. He's 36, so I assume he was named after the book rather than the movie.
Posted by MikeSchaeferSF
at January 8, 2009 1:55 PM
comment #13
bluefugue
says ...
In school in Hawaii, Nakoa would be a pretty normal name. So the Bonets should just make sure to live there.
Posted by bluefugue
at January 8, 2009 1:57 PM
comment #14
storymark
says ...
How dare they give their child a name that reflects their culture!
Or, what a stupid fucking complaint this thread is.
Posted by storymark
at January 8, 2009 1:57 PM
comment #15
storymark
says ...
Seriously, they should have been classy and named their kid after an airplane or something...
Posted by storymark
at January 8, 2009 1:58 PM
comment #16
Krazy Eyes
says ...
I can't tell if Jeff is just being culturally insensitive or just plain ignorant in this thread. All of the Hawaiians I know have equally long names -- they just don't go by the whole thing. My guess is he'll just go by Nakoa Momoa or maybe Nakoa-Wolf Momoa. I don't really see the problem here.
Posted by Krazy Eyes
at January 8, 2009 2:01 PM
comment #17
DeafBrownTrashPunk
says ...
Pilot Inspektor Lee.... oh my.
or how about Moxie Crimefighter? Those names are still a million times worse than the one Lisa Bonet gave her son.
Posted by DeafBrownTrashPunk
at January 8, 2009 2:02 PM
comment #18
Edward
says ...
Let's all remember Moon Unit Zappa. Hasn't seemed to hurt her at all.
Posted by Edward
at January 8, 2009 2:39 PM
comment #19
George Prager
says ...
At least she didn't name him Stinky Smelly Faggot Fuckface Vigoda Momoa.
Posted by George Prager
at January 8, 2009 3:03 PM
comment #20
Calraigh Bracken
says ...
Fifi Trixibelle? Peaches? Pixie?
Posted by Calraigh Bracken
at January 8, 2009 3:27 PM
comment #21
Billy Joel
says ...
Pilot Inspektor (Jason Lee's kid) and 'Peanut' (Jax from 'GH's kid) is worse
Stupid, pretentious, narcisistic Hollywood morons.
Who cares anyway.
Long live Michael, David, & BILLY.
Posted by Billy Joel
at January 8, 2009 3:42 PM
comment #22
Billy Joel
says ...
BTW: Why is Lisa Bonet relevant anymore?
Her last legit job was over 20 years ago.
Posted by Billy Joel
at January 8, 2009 3:45 PM
comment #23
Mr. Muckle
says ...
Does the Jeffster just want to cement his reputation as an oddball crank? If that name is ethnic Hawaiian, it's perfectly honorable. Even if not, this cruel shit isn't worthy of adult conversation. But maybe H-E isn't intended to play to adults. Where's the Q&A with Ann Coulter?
Posted by Mr. Muckle
at January 8, 2009 3:46 PM
comment #24
CitizenKanedforChewingGum
says ...
Who the hell are you to speak about relevance, Billy Joel!
Posted by CitizenKanedforChewingGum
at January 8, 2009 5:02 PM
comment #25
dixiedugan
says ...
At least he'll know most of the alphabet before he goes to school.
Bronx Mowgli...now that is pretty bad.
Posted by dixiedugan
at January 8, 2009 5:17 PM
comment #26
Deathtongue_Groupie
says ...
Uh, Billy Joel, try HIGH FIDELITY just off the top of my head without an IMDB assist.
Posted by Deathtongue_Groupie
at January 8, 2009 11:01 PM
comment #27
nola
says ...
I think it's hawaiian unlike the name Track, Bronx Mowgli, Pilot Inspecktor etc.
Posted by nola
at January 9, 2009 7:57 AM
comment #28
George Prager
says ...
OoooooH she was in HIGH FIDELITY! That's hot!
There were a lot of LPs, rugs, tables, bowls, mugs, spoons and lamps in HIGH FIDELITY as well; most of them had a lot more charm than Bonet.
Posted by George Prager
at January 9, 2009 9:51 AM
comment #29
Bob Violence
says ...
It's a Hawaiian name and not a particularly unusual one, except for the inclusion of "Wolf" (although contemporary Hawaiian names often include an English component, so it's not that weird). Another slam dunk from Wells, then.
At least he'll know most of the alphabet before he goes to school.
If they worked an "I" in there somewhere it would have the entire Hawaiian alphabet.
Posted by Bob Violence
at January 9, 2009 10:56 PM
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