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Antichrist = Fartbomb
I ran right up to the Orange wifi cafe after escaping from Lars von Trier's Antichrist, which had begun at 7:30 pm in the Salle Debussy. I sat down and wrote for a solid hour, so charged by what I'd just seen and what had just happened -- easily one of the biggest debacles in Cannes Film Festival history and the complete meltdown of a major film artist in a way that invites comparison to the sinking of the Titanic -- that I didn't pay attention to the fact that my plug adapter wasn't giving power.
The computer went down and I lost everything. Seven or eight really
good paragraphs.
It's now 10:42 pm and the Orange cafe is about to close. It's over and finished and I'm sick of this day. It's been one thing after another today (heat, sweat, lost power cord) and I know when I'm beaten and drained. I'll sit down and write more again tomorrow. But my God, what a screening! What a reaction! Critics howling, hooting, shrieking.
There's no way Antichrist isn't a major career embarassment for costars
Willem Dafoe and Charlotte Gainsbourg, and a possible career stopper for Von Trier.
It's an out-and-out disaster -- one of the most absurdly on-the-nose, heavy-handed and unintentionally comedic calamities I've ever seen in my life. On top of which it's dedicated to the late Russian director Andrei Tarkovsky, whose rotted and decomposed body is now quite possibly clawing its way out of the grave to stalk the earth, find an axe and slay Von Trier in his bed.
Here's a portion of Von Trier's "director's confession" from the press book:
"Two years ago I suffered from depression. Everything, no matter what, seems unimportant, trivial. I couldn't work. Six months later, jsut as an exercise, I wrote a script. It was a kind of therapy, but also a search, a test to see if would ever make another film.
"The script was finished and filmed without much enthusiasm, made as it was using about half of my physical and intellectual capacity. Scenes were added for no reason. Images were composed free of logic or dramatic thinking. They often came from dreams I was having at the time, or dreams I'd had earlier in my life.
"In any case I offer no excuses for Antichrist. Other than my absolute belief in the film -- the most important film of my entire career!"
A man whom I've admired and respected for many years has lost his mind for the time being, or at last lost it while he was writing and shooting the film. I just can't fathom how the director of Breaking The Waves and Dancer in the Dark and Dogville could have made something so amateurishly awful. The decent and compassionate thing would be to forget Antichrist and to forgive Von Trier. To put it aside and move on on all fronts.
I know that if I had been in Dafoe or Gainsbourg's shoes I would have come to my senses and walked off the film. I would have said "go ahead, sue me -- I welcome a lawsuit!" and walked home proudly and at peace.
Posted by Jeffrey Wells on May 17, 2009 at 1:26 PM
comment #1
BoshBarnetWonkyDonkey
says ...
Blimey. Was it worse than The Happening?
Posted by BoshBarnetWonkyDonkey
at May 17, 2009 2:07 PM
comment #2
Glenn Kenny
says ...
Can't wait!!!!!
Posted by Glenn Kenny
at May 17, 2009 2:28 PM
comment #3
craiged
says ...
sounds like a disaster on the scale of LaButes Wicker Park remake! Should be fun!!!!
Posted by craiged
at May 17, 2009 2:32 PM
comment #4
Nick X
says ...
Wicker Man. Can't wait.
Posted by Nick X
at May 17, 2009 2:33 PM
comment #5
Nick X
says ...
I want to read those lost seven or eight paragraphs.
Posted by Nick X
at May 17, 2009 2:33 PM
comment #6
craiged
says ...
or Wicker Man even!
Posted by craiged
at May 17, 2009 2:34 PM
comment #7
Dance Commander
says ...
Von Trier lost his mind? Good. I think he lost his mind quite a long time ago but that's just my opinion. If he gets artistically lambasted, loses all desire to be creative and stops making movies, that's a swell deal in my book.
Posted by Dance Commander
at May 17, 2009 2:37 PM
comment #8
BurmaShave
says ...
"On top of which it's dedicated to the late Russian
director Andrei Tarkovsky, whose rotted and decomposed body is now quite possibly clawing its way out of the grave to stalk the earth, find an axe and slay Von Trier in his bed."
Whatever paragraphs you lost, it was worth it for this.
Posted by BurmaShave
at May 17, 2009 2:39 PM
comment #9
craiged
says ...
With his "director's confession" comments you have to wonder how he even managed to raise the funds to make the film in the first place. It sounds like he knew it really wasn't worth making even before he started filming.
Posted by craiged
at May 17, 2009 2:43 PM
comment #10
bfm
says ...
Fascinating story. If it's a disaster. as you say, I wonder what that will do for his state of mind?
It's so annoying to lose something you've written and feel happy with. My condolences. But you've still done a great job of communicating your reactions to the film. I can't wait to hear more.
Posted by bfm
at May 17, 2009 2:43 PM
comment #11
dangovich
says ...
Sounds like a documentary on the making of this film would have been more interesting than the film itself.
Posted by dangovich
at May 17, 2009 2:44 PM
comment #12
Geoff
says ...
And apparently this film has some pretty extreme gore, so it sounds destined for some kind of cult status.
Posted by Geoff
at May 17, 2009 2:47 PM
comment #13
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says ...
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Posted by BoshBarnetWonkyDonkey
at May 17, 2009 2:50 PM
comment #14
fredderf
says ...
I wanna read those lost seven or eight paragraphs too.
Crash and burn huh?, too bad. Promotional shots looked so promising. Of course, I'll still see it, it sounds Magnificently bad.
Posted by fredderf
at May 17, 2009 2:51 PM
comment #15
byanyother
says ...
Well I'll use this opportunity to make a case for Wordpress, which saves drafts of what you're working on (presuming you were writing directly into MT).
Posted by byanyother
at May 17, 2009 2:56 PM
comment #16
buster keaton
says ...
So now you GOTTA go to the Hotel Du Cap and interview Von Trier and run the entire MP3 on the site, so we can get the full intensity of the conversation. . . .I always thought Dogville was a dog, and that Dancer in the Dark was a sad waste of Bjork's incredible talents, which are better served in any one of her music videos directed by Jonze or Gondry or even Spumco.
Posted by buster keaton
at May 17, 2009 3:05 PM
comment #17
DarienStyles
says ...
Can it be that bad? I mean, I saw Neil LaBute's The Wicker Man and I can't imagine anything worse. I love every movie featuring Charlotte Gainsbourg, who I find to be one of the most underrated actresses in film today, so I'd probably see this, no matter how bad it is.
Posted by DarienStyles
at May 17, 2009 3:07 PM
comment #18
hunterd
says ...
Hey Wells, at least 4 times during the last 10 months that I have visited this blog you have commented that you lost work because of power failure...why not try to not type your work directly into the web browser. Hell, even Word files will save your work if your comp crashes.
Also, I adored Manderlay...but I think I'm alone in that.
Posted by hunterd
at May 17, 2009 3:11 PM
comment #19
Jeffrey Wells
says ...
Dancer in the Dark is a near masterpiece. Don't dump on the guy because he's down. Compassion needs to be shown. This film needs to be forgiven and forgotten. Everyone goes astray, makes mistakes, etc. I feel for the guy. But I was amazed at what I saw. It was one big "oh, noooooh!"
Posted by Jeffrey Wells
at May 17, 2009 3:13 PM
comment #20
raygo
says ...
For once, Nicole Kidman showed incredible foresight.
Posted by raygo
at May 17, 2009 3:24 PM
comment #21
Flash Gordon
says ...
Ron Howard must be celebrating today. A movie shown at Cannes apparently has a worse reaction than The Da Vinci Code.
Posted by Flash Gordon
at May 17, 2009 3:25 PM
comment #22
Flash Gordon
says ...
Vincent "Brown Bunny" Gallo must be happy too.
Posted by Flash Gordon
at May 17, 2009 3:28 PM
comment #23
gustav13
says ...
from Reuters:
http://www.reuters.com/article/filmNews/idUSTRE54G2JF20090517
"Danish director Lars von Trier elicited derisive laughter, gasps of disbelief, a smattering of applause and loud boos on Sunday as the credits rolled on his drama "Antichrist" at the Cannes film festival."
Posted by gustav13
at May 17, 2009 3:34 PM
comment #24
buster keaton
says ...
Every time I look at Lars
I don't understand
Why he let the things he filmed
Get so out of hand
He'd have managed better
If he'd had it all planned
Now why'd he choose such a backward time
And such a strange Cannes?
If he''d cut some scenes
He could have reached the whole nation
Denmark in 2010 has no mass communication
Don't you get me wrong
Don't you get me wrong, now
Don't you get me wrong
Only want to know
Only want to know
Only want to know, now
Lars von Trier
Antichrist
Who are you? What have you sacrificed?
Lars von Trier
Superstar
Do you think you're what they say you are?
Tell me what you think
About auteurs at the top
Now who d'you think besides yourself
Was the pick of the crop?
Wong Kar-Wai was he where it's at?
Is he where you are?
Could Tarantino really move a mountain
Or was that Harvey PR?
Did you mean to shoot like that?
Was that a mistake or
Did you know your messy movie
Would be a Debussy stinker?
Posted by buster keaton
at May 17, 2009 4:00 PM
comment #25
Noah Redfield
says ...
How does the screening compare to The Brown Bunny or Southland Tales? If worse then against my better judgment, I will see Anti-Christ.
Posted by Noah Redfield
at May 17, 2009 4:06 PM
comment #26
crazyeight
says ...
Hunterd wrote: "Hey Wells, at least 4 times during the last 10 months that I have visited this blog you have commented that you lost work because of power failure..."
THIS. I came in here to echo this.
Wells-- you get PAID to write for a living as an INTERNET journalist.
And yet, you can't even master an "autosave" function?
How do you not fall down more?
Posted by crazyeight
at May 17, 2009 4:08 PM
comment #27
BurmaShave
says ...
In a stirring act of selflessness, buster has offered something worse than ANTICHRIST.
Posted by BurmaShave
at May 17, 2009 4:09 PM
comment #28
COCO
says ...
Another terrible artsy film.....oh well....
saw "Angels and Demons" today for the Senior
rate. Did I win?
Posted by COCO
at May 17, 2009 5:02 PM
comment #29
buster keaton
says ...
Much respect, Burma, for your anti-kudo. I'd like to thank the Hollywood Foreign Press, and all the little people who helped me get here, including Billy Barty. On a serious note, I'm not the only one making worse things than ANTICHRIST. Ebert's review is subtitled "Lars and the Real Girl" while The Wrap's insightful review calls it "deeply perverted." and summarizes the plot as follows: "let's just say that somebody goes crazy, and somebody else endures a lot of pain." Ow-ow-ouch!
Posted by buster keaton
at May 17, 2009 6:43 PM
comment #30
csheron
says ...
I can only imagine that in those really good seven or eight paragraphs we would find even the slightest substantiation that one would expect to somewhat justify the eight subsequent paragraphs of unsupported Amazon.com-review grade "observations". Since this piece consistently fails to elaborate beyond the title's two words and a symbol, perhaps Twitter would be the optimal medium?
Posted by csheron
at May 17, 2009 7:28 PM
comment #31
berkguru
says ...
Jeff - can you post a SPOILER noted recap of some of the movie's craziest scenes/moments for us? Thanks
Posted by berkguru
at May 17, 2009 7:41 PM
comment #32
Mr. F.
says ...
Wells - does this mean my Morettini "Von Trier/Van Halen" t-shirt is no longer considered cool? Let me know if I should throw it out...
Posted by Mr. F.
at May 17, 2009 8:38 PM
comment #33
Jeffrey Wells
says ...
Wells to csheron: Descriptions and whatnot were included in the piece I lost. Sorry to disappoint.
Posted by Jeffrey Wells
at May 17, 2009 10:11 PM
comment #34
Terry McCarty
says ...
Could ANTICHRIST be something that Roger Corman could buy and re-edit into a suitable exploitation film?
Posted by Terry McCarty
at May 17, 2009 10:45 PM
comment #35
YRG
says ...
Wells-- I'm sorry you lost your work. That is the greatest fear of a writer-- these days I save after almost every paragraph.
As for the film, is it worse than Synecdoche?
Posted by YRG
at May 18, 2009 5:47 AM
comment #36
actionman
says ...
Now I really want to see this film.
Oh, and YRG, Synecdoche, NY is a masterpiece.
Posted by actionman
at May 18, 2009 6:27 AM
comment #37
qwiggles
says ...
This is great, Jeff, though I don't necessarily buy that it's as much of a career meltdown/turning point as you say it is, given the awful ham-fisted nonsense that was Manderlay. i.e. "It's an out-and-out disaster -- one of the most absurdly on-the-nose, heavy-handed and unintentionally comedic calamities I've ever seen in my life" could easily describe my reaction to that turd.
Posted by qwiggles
at May 18, 2009 7:14 AM
comment #38
Abbey Normal
says ...
I've loathed Von Trier for awhile now. He quickly lost the balance of tone that made Breaking the Waves great. Ever since, he has increasingly operated from a head space of despair and ungenerosity. The way he treats his actors--and his audience--has been despicable for quite some time.
Long have I been baffled by the generally positive critical reception for Dancer in the Dark. It's film-as-tantrum, a bitter, unsubtle, cruel-minded piece of garbage. The hatreds in that movie, of musicals, of America, of helplessness, is not high-minded. It was just a grind for no reason: Get everyone to love Bjork, then subject her to unrelenting pain, suffering and death. Von Trier has nothing insightful to say, really, he's just ranting like a 3-year-old who wants his mommy.
Anyway, yeah. I am a kind person generally and I wouldn't wish depression on anybody. However, it is my fervent hope that this movie makes it impossible for Von Trier to work in the field of moviemaking ever again.
Posted by Abbey Normal
at May 18, 2009 10:23 AM
comment #39
Armin Tamzarian
says ...
The dude's whole career has been about taking the piss. That he can still manage to get y'all riled up is a major accomplishment on his part.
Carry on, my wayward Danish son!
Posted by Armin Tamzarian
at May 18, 2009 11:50 AM
comment #40
ZayTonday
says ...
Synecdoche is a FUCKING MASTERPIECE of a movie, speaking ill of it reveals more about yourself than it does of anyone else.
Posted by ZayTonday
at May 18, 2009 5:50 PM
comment #41
jett
says ...
I think some of his past work is brilliant but he recently discredits himself by saying he doesn't make his work for an audience but for himself and that he is the greatest filmmaker in the world. He says he made the film out of a depressed state of mind. I think it's self-indulgent to make an international public display of your messed-up 'therapy'. Obviously the man is a narcissist who does and says whatever he wants regardless of the consequences for human experience.
Posted by jett
at May 19, 2009 11:53 AM
comment #42
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at September 18, 2009 9:01 PM
comment #43
milan
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Posted by milan
at September 18, 2009 9:02 PM
comment #44
milan
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That he can still manage to get y'all riled up is a major accomplishment on his part.
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at September 18, 2009 9:03 PM
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milan
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, speaking ill of it reveals more about yourself than it does of anyone else. high school
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at October 3, 2009 12:22 PM
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at October 4, 2009 1:09 AM
comment #52
MichaelGuy
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at October 6, 2009 1:59 PM
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illusion
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wonder how he even managed to raise the funds to make the film in the first place. It sounds like he knew it really wasn't worth making even before he started filming.
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comment #64
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at October 27, 2009 3:58 AM
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illusion
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In any case I offer no excuses for Antichrist. Other than my absolute belief in the film -- the most important film of my entire career!
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That is a big record for the industry. I never missed Cannes Film Festival at all. The award is great to present new talents. Thanks!
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