Found Footage

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In a 6.13.09 posting called "Barnyard" I described a confrontation with an obnoxious popcorn muncher at Loews' Lincoln Square during a first-anywhere showing of the trailer for Michael Moore's financial-meltdown doc (the title of which, Capitalism: A Love Story, has just been announced). This morning I found video footage on Moore's site of crowd reactions to this very same first-anywhere viewing -- including brief footage of myself and this guy. It begins around the 19-second mark and goes until 23 or 24.

You can see a blurry image of yours truly (wearing a white shirt) standing along the wall in the right-rear section, and you can see the ugly bald guy -- glasses, white T-shirt -- sitting in my immediate vicinity.

The 6.13 story read as follows: "Last night around 6:45 pm I walked into Leows Lincoln Square and a mid-sized theatre playing The Hangover to see the Michael Moore teaser. Except I made the mistake of sitting behind an ugly bald guy whose seat was leaning way back, in the same way that thoughtless people in coach lean their seats right into your face. He was short and bald and rocking in his seat as he stuffed his face with popcorn. It was like sitting behind a rambunctious seven year-old. I hated him on sight.

"The feeling was apparently mutual because he kept half-turning-around -- i.e., the universal gesture that means 'hey, quit what you're doing because you're bothering me.' I crossed my leg to re-tie my shoe and this asshole turned around. He bounced his seat back and it hit my left knee and this asshole turned around. I was sitting behind him doing nothing (except thinking what an asshole he was) and this asshole turned around.

"After the fifth or sixth turn-around I said, 'What...? What's your problem?' He said I was breathing on his head and it bothered him. Nostril breath, he meant. 'Well, you're gonna have to deal with it, pal, because I'm not gonna stop breathing,' I said. 'You wanna sit on my lap?' he said. No, I said, and why don't you try just sucking it in and shutting the fuck up? 'Just go...just get outta here,' he said. 'I'm not going anywhere,' I said. 'Find a way to live with it.'"