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Ishtar
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The Fortune
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-30-
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Betrayal
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Play It As It Lays
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The Outfit
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Alex in Wonderland
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The Legend of Lylah Clare
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In The Cool of the Day
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That Cold Day in the Park
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Thumb Trippin'
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Midas Run
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At Long Last Love
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Outcast of the Islands
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Run of the Arrow
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House of Secrets
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Saint Joan
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The Fiend Who Walked the West
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The Chalk Garden
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A Thousand Clowns
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You're a Big Boy Now
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Dark of the Sun
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Skidoo
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Last Summer
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I Never Sang for My Father
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Marriage of a Young Stockbroker
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The Music Lovers
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Drive, He Said
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Simon
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When the Wind Blows
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Housekeeping
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Haunted Summer
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Upcoming

January 8

Bitch Slap

Waiting for Armageddon

Wonderful World

Youth in Revolt

January 15

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The Girl on the Train

Kill Harvey

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With Variety's Michael Fleming having reported that the wise and perceptive Tom Hanks has decided against playing Elwood P. Dowd in Steven Spielberg's Harvey remake, Movieline's Kyle Buchanan is predicting that Will Smith will probably snap it up.

But if Smith knows what's good for him, he won't. He needs to (a) man up and stop trying to be likable/charming/ingratiating all the time, (b) never commit on-screen suicide with lethal jellyfish ever again, and (c) realize that Spielberg is starting to be over and do the old downhill side. I'm pledging right now that if Smith turns Spielberg down he'll get a 12-month goodwill pass from Hollywood Elsewhere. Okay, 18 months.

The word needs to go out to all the agencies -- turn Spielberg down if he comes calling with the Harvey role! The ideal thing would be Spielberg re-experiencing what George McGovern went through in '72 when he offered the vice-presidential slot to just about everyone after Thomas Eagleton was zotzed off the ticket. Can the Harvey project be nipped in the bud? It's won't be a catastrophe if it gets made. I'll live, nobody will get sick, etc. But it does seem like such a rotten idea.

Absence of Kim's<< previous | next >>Ding-Dong, Bens Are Dead

Posted by Jeffrey Wells on August 5, 2009 at 10:04 AM

comment #1

DeafBrownTrashPunk says ...

I'm still recovering from having vomited so many times upon hearing the awful news that Will Smith is doing an OldBoy remake.

Oh dear god and now THIS????????????

Posted by DeafBrownTrashPunk at August 5, 2009 10:41 AM

comment #2

p.Vice says ...

Did someone forget to mention that Smith's attachment to this is PURE SPECULATION????

My vote goes to Mickey Rourke.

Posted by p.Vice at August 5, 2009 10:51 AM

comment #3

BoshBarnetWonkyDonkey says ...

This from the Variety piece: "Insiders on the Fox-DreamWorks project said that despite press coverage that has fixated on why Spielberg would remake a film classic, the truth is, the Jonathan Tropper-scripted film that was developed by Fox 2000 is a contemporary story that is much closer in tone to the play than it is to that film."

We're all assuming it's going to be some mawkish shite but the speed with which Spielberg snapped it up means for all we know it could be a very good script indeed. It makes sense that Hanks passed, given that he is already compared to Stewart and thus wouldn't want to invite further comparison. But now the surprise has died down, I'm prepared to approach this with an open mind.

Posted by BoshBarnetWonkyDonkey at August 5, 2009 10:54 AM

comment #4

Emmanuel_Goldstein says ...

There's worse things than being compared to Jimmy Stewart.... But having said that, props to Hanks for turning it down, as I'm sure it was tempting on some levels.

Posted by Emmanuel_Goldstein at August 5, 2009 11:00 AM

comment #5

sellusWallace says ...

second the spirit of a mickey rourke casting, the idea of going far from jimmy, hanks or smith.

but colin farrell would knock it out of the park.

Posted by sellusWallace at August 5, 2009 11:01 AM

comment #6

Thesilenttype says ...

Jim Carrey. Or Clooney.

Posted by Thesilenttype at August 5, 2009 11:10 AM

comment #7

DeeZee says ...

Jeff: You should only agree to stop trashing Smith when he also drops Oldboy.

Posted by DeeZee at August 5, 2009 11:16 AM

comment #8

MilkMan says ...

I would cast Dreyfus, and replace the giant rabbit with a giant rolled-up twenty dollar bill and have him married to an ex-whore (Pfeiffer) with permanent black and blue eyes.

Posted by MilkMan at August 5, 2009 11:17 AM

comment #9

Rich S. says ...

You know who should play Dowd? Spielberg himself.

Posted by Rich S. at August 5, 2009 11:19 AM

comment #10

George Prager says ...

HARVEY? Who gives a shit? A C+ movie when it came out.
I'm rooting for Judge Reinhold.

And as for an Oldboy remake. Again...who gives a shit?
What the hell is Oldboy anyway?

Posted by George Prager at August 5, 2009 11:24 AM

comment #11

DeeZee says ...

Universal's next bomb. http://www.themoviebox.net/movies/2009/STUVWXYZ/Vampires-Assistant,The/trailer.php

Posted by DeeZee at August 5, 2009 11:33 AM

comment #12

Gordon27 says ...

"that Spielberg is starting to be over and do the old downhill side."

I like it when people consistently hate on something, but always try and temper their language so that it sounds as if the hatred is fresh. You've been bashing Spielberg non-stop since this site was set up, with the sole exception of the build-up to 'Kingdom of the Crystal Skull', which you posted an incredibly positive review of and only retracted when people actually saw it and pointed out that it was far worse than the Spielberg movies for which you feign hatred.

I don't care if you want to hate on Spielberg, but it seems dishonest to pretend you're only doing it now because of this movie.

Also, HARRY ANDERSON FOR HARVEY!!

Posted by Gordon27 at August 5, 2009 11:46 AM

comment #13

MrTribeca says ...

I see Jim Carrey getting this gig.

Just by the by, Spielberg said ten or so years ago that if he were to remake Jaws, Carrey would get the Dreyfuss role.

Posted by MrTribeca at August 5, 2009 12:17 PM

comment #14

raygo says ...

How about we go with a female ... Jennifer Aniston sounds about right.

Posted by raygo at August 5, 2009 12:20 PM

comment #15

Mr. Gittes says ...

Christian Bale. A reunion. Ha!

Posted by Mr. Gittes at August 5, 2009 12:24 PM

comment #16

MickTravisMcGee says ...

Patton Oswalt. It would either be brilliant or unintentionally hilarious.

"Bend over Abigail May here comes the gravy pipe!"

Posted by MickTravisMcGee at August 5, 2009 12:29 PM

comment #17

heybub1 says ...

Oh thank GOD:
http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/Movies/story?id=8254270&page=1

Posted by heybub1 at August 5, 2009 1:04 PM

comment #18

Terry McCarty says ...

How about Greg Kinnear for Elwood?

Posted by Terry McCarty at August 5, 2009 1:11 PM

comment #19

actionman says ...

"What the hell is Oldboy anyway?"

u can't be serious, right?

Posted by actionman at August 5, 2009 1:11 PM

comment #20

dinovelvet says ...

Mickey Rourke or Colin Farrell? Oh shit, I've got it. Mickey Rourke IS the rabbit!

-Ye're a fookin' rabbit!
-Hey, fuck you, motherfucker.

etc etc.

Posted by dinovelvet at August 5, 2009 1:28 PM

comment #21

Gordon27 says ...

Kinnear is too good a choice for Spielberg to make it. I could see Carrey doing this -- it's surprising they haven't worked together at all yet. Hanks would fit better with the character, though.

Posted by Gordon27 at August 5, 2009 1:38 PM

comment #22

Rod32303 says ...

Speilberg is over AGAIN? Jesus. Haters. Fuck 'em.

Posted by Rod32303 at August 5, 2009 1:48 PM

comment #23

Mr. F. says ...

They need to combine the worst of all elements: the characters are nothing but CG animals; Elwood P. Dowd is a 6-foot rabbit who's convinced he's friends with the ghost of Jimmy Stewart. Hijinks ensue.

Posted by Mr. F. at August 5, 2009 2:26 PM

comment #24

Stringer Bell says ...

Never count out the great 'Spiels'. He's still better than 99% of the filmmakers out there.

Posted by Stringer Bell at August 5, 2009 2:38 PM

comment #25

Carl Kolchak says ...

Sam Rockwell

Posted by Carl Kolchak at August 5, 2009 3:29 PM

comment #26

Gordie Lachance says ...

Yeah, Man!!

Harvey sucks, Oldboy sucks, Spielberg sucks, Will Smith sucks, everything sucks!!!!

I love this blog!!!!!!!

Posted by Gordie Lachance at August 5, 2009 4:13 PM

comment #27

nemo says ...

Harvey was sentimental slop even by the standards of its day. Its day is long dead and gone.

Posted by nemo at August 5, 2009 5:28 PM

comment #28

Carl LaFong says ...

Folks, Dowd is a hallucinogenic whack job and an unrepentant alcohlic (not really sure how that will go over whimsically nowadays). Since Spielberg likes to work with people from past flicks, I respectfully submit:

Christopher Walken

Posted by Carl LaFong at August 5, 2009 5:39 PM

comment #29

nodirectionhome says ...

JEFF, thanks for finally pointing out what few choose to recoginize. Speilberg is a lost cause, it's too easy to say he's lost touch, there's something more troubling at heart because of the caricature he has inhibited. We rode along through his midlife crisis exploration ie. AMISTAD,SCHINDLER & RYAN and his late self awareness phase AI, MINORITY & WORLDS; of course the bright spots along the way, CATCH & MUNICH were merely lights in the passing lane until we came to full tilt boogie with CRYSTAL SKULL a macabe combination of all things wrong with post-SCHINDLER Speilberg. For all you SKULL sympathizers, admit it you were disappointed. What should've been a pinacle success for all he strided against as a young director was the exact opposite; a horrendous display of Hollywood greed he once dispised.

Posted by nodirectionhome at August 5, 2009 5:49 PM

comment #30

Rod32303 says ...

whatever, he's still a brilliant filmmaker, the putrid "Skull" not withstanding. Why should the fourth (never should have been made in the first place) in basically what was a popcorn serial, albeit a great one, be one's "pinnacle"??

Harvey won't be that, either (and I hope he holds on to Lincoln just to spite the one who writes this site), but you're being reductive and bitchy by labeling him a "lost cause." By whose standards? Those sitting anonymously behind a computer screen, typing their own self-hating bile? As always, different strokes for different folks - your opinion is your own, but it doesn't speak for everyone and is certainly not any kind of legit authority. Just expressing what you feel, I guess. Just know that millions feel differently.

Posted by Rod32303 at August 5, 2009 6:35 PM

comment #31

DeeZee says ...

The fourth IJ flick should've been a rousing farewell to the series, but it was an excuse to open up a crappy fifth one with Shia.

Posted by DeeZee at August 5, 2009 11:22 PM

comment #32

Alexander says ...

Spielberg is over, Coppola is over, Scorsese wasn't over but he was clearly slipping until The Departed, Tim Burton was definitely over until Sweeney Todd, the Coens were possibly on thin ice there for a while until No Country for Old Men, on and on it goes.

But Spielberg is *definitely* over, and a hack besides.

I do strangely enjoy the declarations of Jeff Wells.

I like the suggestion of Christopher Walken, Carl LaFong.

Posted by Alexander at August 6, 2009 3:21 AM

comment #33

Josh Massey says ...

How can somebody be over until something? Isn't "over" definitive?

Spielberg has made one truly awful film in his entire career, and it just so happens it was the most recent. And he has churned out some middling ones recently, like The Terminal or Amistad.

However, the guy has Catch Me If You Can, Minority Report, War of the Worlds and Munich in the last decade alone - he's hardly done.

(Of course, I still don't see the Harvey attraction).

Posted by Josh Massey at August 6, 2009 7:08 AM

comment #34