Raw Deal

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I missed my Houston to Shreveport flight through no fault of my own, so I'm chilling until the next flight leaves at 5:30 pm. My Newark-to-Houston flight landed at 3 pm (i.e., 20 minutes late), and it was utterly impossible to make the 3:30 pm flight to Shreveport for three good reasons. Actually, make it four.

Houston Airport Terminal A -- Thursday, 10.1, 4:35 pm

One, The Shreveport departure terminal was almost a mile away from the one I arrived at from Newark. Two, to get there I had to wait for and then ride on the slowest and dinkiest airport shuttle system in North America. Three, with my flight leaving in five or six minutes and the gate about 500 yards away, I was forced to go through security scanning a second time -- thank you, Houston George Bush airport! And four, the people who booked my flight cut it too close -- never book a connecting flight without at least 90 minutes between flights, and two hours if you want to up your odds even more.

The same thing happened to me in Munich on my way to Cannes a couple of years ago, and that was my fault for not being more careful about the connecting times. And no, I don't hate Houston because of this. I hated Houston for other reasons long before.

Zenovich on David Wells<< previous | next >>That's It

Posted by Jeffrey Wells on October 1, 2009 at 2:27 PM

comment #1

Mgmax, le Corbeau says ...

I love reading about Jeff's green lifestyle. This one has, what, two planes, a bus and five airports in it. And in all five he posted something about those fucking fat Eloi destroying the planet and not giving a shit.

Posted by Mgmax, le Corbeau at October 1, 2009 2:44 PM

comment #2

EDouglasCS says ...

Man, I hate Dallas terminal and I'm probably going to have to go through the same thing in a couple hours... and probably will have to throw away my water/soda to go back through security.

Posted by EDouglasCS at October 1, 2009 2:47 PM

comment #3

Ryansi51 says ...

Ronald McFirbank-

How would you propose he makes that trip more suited to your Eco needs?

are you fucking kidding me?

Posted by Ryansi51 at October 1, 2009 3:02 PM

comment #4

barryegan says ...

What about the quality of the wifi?

Posted by barryegan at October 1, 2009 3:04 PM

comment #5

George Prager says ...

Remember Kevin Kline in SOPHIE'S CHOICE? That's Ronald McFirbank.

Posted by George Prager at October 1, 2009 3:09 PM

comment #6

NotImpressed1Yet says ...

Ronald McFirbank's post is easily the dumbest thing I've read today. What a fucking idiot!

Pretty obvious too that his is just a new name for someone recently kicked off the board. Can Wells ban IP addresses along with user accounts? That'd go a long way...

Posted by NotImpressed1Yet at October 1, 2009 3:36 PM

comment #7

dinovelvet says ...

What about encounters with fatties on the plane? On a flight to Texas, you gotta figure the odds are good for such an encounter.

Posted by dinovelvet at October 1, 2009 3:51 PM

comment #8

Gaydos says ...

Look at the far back corner of the photo. There's a wiry little man with a close cropped goatee and moustache. He's wearing a red bandana around his forehead, Lee jeans, Tony Lama boots, a Wrangler cowboy shirt and mirrored shades.

He's drinking Herradura tequila and laughing about your missed flight to visit the set of the Rod Lurie remake of "Straw Dogs."

Posted by Gaydos at October 1, 2009 4:02 PM

comment #9

buster keaton says ...

And, so, it begins. . . . .

Posted by buster keaton at October 1, 2009 4:27 PM

comment #10

QualityGibberish says ...

buster keaton has it right. Jeff's road trips are classics of sitcom disaster.

Posted by QualityGibberish at October 1, 2009 4:37 PM

comment #11

berkguru says ...

You couldnt run your old ass 500 yards in 6 minutes?

Posted by berkguru at October 1, 2009 5:24 PM

comment #12

Jack South P.I. says ...

Wells took mass transportation every step of the way. That's as eco as it gets, douche bag.

Posted by Jack South P.I. at October 1, 2009 5:26 PM

comment #13

Travis Crabtree says ...

"The Jeffrey Show"

(Christof watches from high above in the control room)

Christof: Cue fat, illiterate cab driver!

Control Room Director: It's no use. He's heading for a shuttle bus. What should I do?

Christof: (pause) Call the bus strike!

Control Room Director: (hesitates) I can't. That'll push him over the edge.

Christof: Do it! And increase the humidity to 90%. Now.

Posted by Travis Crabtree at October 1, 2009 5:29 PM

comment #14

Sebguts says ...

I hate Houston too. At least you didn't have to live there...

Posted by Sebguts at October 1, 2009 9:59 PM

comment #15

Bilge says ...

Really, is a goddamned Rod Lurie film worth all this trouble?

Posted by Bilge at October 1, 2009 10:39 PM

comment #16

Polanski Raped A Child says ...

karma.

Posted by Polanski Raped A Child at October 2, 2009 4:29 AM

comment #17

Joe McDonald says ...

I'm from Houston and love it dearly, but I concur that IAH is one of the most desolate and unappealing places on earth.

And I've been to Oklahoma.

Posted by Joe McDonald at October 2, 2009 9:44 AM

comment #18

Mgmax, le Corbeau says ...

"How would you propose he makes that trip more suited to your Eco needs?"

What makes you think I'm in any way dissatisfied with Jeff's spin-on-a-dime self-righteousness about others' and obliviousness to his own behavior? It obviously amuses me to a considerable degree.

Posted by Mgmax, le Corbeau at October 2, 2009 2:27 PM

comment #19

NotImpressed1Yet says ...

Ronald, you're a complete douche.

Posted by NotImpressed1Yet at October 2, 2009 6:47 PM

comment #20

Mgmax, le Corbeau says ...

You have no idea how much that means coming from... the Eloi who hang around here now. Here's how H-E used to discuss issues like the environment, back when men posted here:

http://hollywood-elsewhere.com/2007/05/son_of_inconven.php

Posted by Mgmax, le Corbeau at October 2, 2009 7:48 PM

comment #21