Girl Can't Help It

I'll let the views in this Eli Roth/Inglourious Basterds slam piece speak for themselves, but you can tell right off the bat that Melissa Lafsky (i.e., "Horror Chick") is a zappy and flavorful writer. "The bulk of the rest of Roth's career -- and even the success of Hostel -- has rested on the unbelievably lucky move of becoming Quentin Tarantino's shoulder monkey," etc.

Posted by Jeffrey Wells on March 4, 2010 at 11:04 AM

comment #1

PCP Author Profile Page says ...

She's absolutely right. Roth had some success with Cabin Fever and Hostel but he is higher profile than he should be all because he is one of Quentin Tarantino's friends/toadies. They obviously have the same interests (pulp cinema, european horror, and grind house flicks) and so they became buddies and as a result, QT has advanced Roth's career quicker and probably more than he should have had.

But it is what it is, no?

Posted by PCP Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 11:31 AM

comment #2

PCP Author Profile Page says ...

By the way, it should be noted that Stephen King said the wave of flicks (led by Roth) are all junk and not scary. He even pulled the plug on Roth directing a film version of his novel, Cell.

Posted by PCP Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 11:35 AM

comment #3

Rich S. Author Profile Page says ...

I'm particularly impressed with her repeated use of "fucking." Really makes the piece all the more persuasive.

Posted by Rich S. Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 11:40 AM

comment #4

PCP Author Profile Page says ...

Though I liked the film, her point here is correct:

"The title characters of the film were also irrelevant: the entire plot could have happened without the presence of the Basterds. They were a silly sideshow. "

Posted by PCP Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 11:47 AM

comment #5

OtownRog Author Profile Page says ...

What PCP said. Except for the "liked the film" part.

Posted by OtownRog Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 11:48 AM

comment #6

worrywort Author Profile Page says ...

"right off the bat"

I see what you did there. Nicely done.

Posted by worrywort Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 11:48 AM

comment #7

arch451 Author Profile Page says ...

Now that she mentions it, if Adrien Brody had the part of Eli Roth in Inglorious Bastards, I think I would have liked the movie.

Posted by arch451 Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 11:57 AM

comment #8

PCP Author Profile Page says ...

Adam Sandler was offered the part first but turned it down or his salary was too much. But he was offered the role first.

Posted by PCP Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 11:59 AM

comment #9

Movie Watcher Author Profile Page says ...

PCP, the Cell book was awful, not up to the level of his other books. Maybe Roth not directing is a blessing in disguise.

Posted by Movie Watcher Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:09 PM

comment #10

The InSneider Author Profile Page says ...

That article was complete and utter bullshit. She's a hater. Roth is a showman, a one-of-a-kind original. He hasn't made a great movie yet but he hasn't made a bad one either. To even bring Ti West into the convo is ridiculous. And I liked Roth so much as Sgt. Donowitz, I dressed as him for Halloween. And just because the Basterds were supporting characters in their own movie, doesn't mean it wasn't good. That piece is so wrong-headed, I don't think I'll ever read anything by her again. Why give her any attention at all?

Posted by The InSneider Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:11 PM

comment #11

Eloi Manning Author Profile Page says ...

What happened to Robert Rodriguez? He and QT seemed inseparable for a while, but now it seems Eli Roth is his main buddy. Five years ago, Rodriguez would surely have been asked to direct Nation's Pride, no?

Posted by Eloi Manning Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:12 PM

comment #12

liveforever Author Profile Page says ...

I'm not into torture porn, so I avoided the Hostel series. I thought 'Cabin Fever' was okay, nothing special. Roth was horrible in 'IB'. He can't act for shit, and he whipped out this awful Boston accent for the film.

QT, it's cool you are friends with Roth, but don't subject us to his lack of acting ability just because you guys are bro's. This is no different than a director casting their girlfriend/wife for a lead role when clearly a better actress would have benefited the film.

Posted by liveforever Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:19 PM

comment #13

Deathtongue_Groupie Author Profile Page says ...

I saw CABIN FEVER on opening day as part of a theater-hop triple feature. Had not heard anything about it, but the blurb was interesting and I needed something between MATCHSTICK MEN & ONCE UPON A TIME IN MEXICO.

After VIRUS, it is the worst horror movie I've ever "paid" to see. Clearly, Roth was far more into the gore gags than getting his halfway decent premise into better shape.

Posted by Deathtongue_Groupie Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:21 PM

comment #14

jackkerouac Author Profile Page says ...

Absolutely, 100% on the money about Roth and Basterds.

Posted by jackkerouac Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:22 PM

comment #15

moviesquad Author Profile Page says ...

Roth might not be a good actor, but the introduction of the Jew Bear in IB is classic.

Posted by moviesquad Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:22 PM

comment #16

Eloi Manning Author Profile Page says ...

I didn't really mind Roth's performance in IB. I think if I was a regular moviegoer who had no idea that I was watching the director of Hostel swinging the bat, I wouldn't have cared. He has an unhinged face and the right sort of bulky frame for "the bear Jew" so he wasn't horrendous casting. He's not a great actor, but he had about five lines. A more starry name, like Sandler, would have been far more jarring.

Posted by Eloi Manning Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:25 PM

comment #17

Rothchild Author Profile Page says ...

PCP:

Are you this consistently wrong about everything in life or just matters related to Eli Roth? King didn't pull the plug and Sandler was shooting Funny People at the time.

Posted by Rothchild Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:27 PM

comment #18

Fortunesfool Author Profile Page says ...

Roth is a smug self publicist. Cabin Fever is a hideous film. Never saw the 'Hostels'. Wouldn't tire of kicking him.

Posted by Fortunesfool Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:27 PM

comment #19

Wrecktem Author Profile Page says ...

She's right about one thing. Tarantino devised (or at least sold) this movie as a "men on a mission" flick in the vein of the Dirty Dozon or The Guns of Navarone. The one thing those movies had that this film didn't is that the men on those missions were kinda rad. They were played by tough-guy character actors that oozed sexiness/charisma/toughness, etc.

The Basterds, I guess by design, were mostly a bunch of nebbishy nobodies and consequently their story arc lacks the necessary interest. Poor Brad has to carry the load himself. If it weren't for the much more interesting other sotrylines in the film, Tarantino's "men on a mission" story would be a complete failure.

He should have really gone the route Spielberg chose in Munich, and chosen a bunch of hunky bad-asses. I know, I know, that wasn't what he wanted. But the proof is in the pudding, and this particular pudding is WEAK.

Posted by Wrecktem Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:29 PM

comment #20

Krazy Eyes Author Profile Page says ...

She had me in her pocket until she went and praised Ti Fucking West as an example of a good horror director.

House of the Devil was passable but horribly overhyped. The Roost is still one of the lamest horror films I've ever seen. West couldn't block a comprehensible scene if his life depended on it. Plus both his films have short story level plots stretched out to interminable feature length. What a hack.

Posted by Krazy Eyes Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:36 PM

comment #21

liveforever Author Profile Page says ...

I wrote my original post without reading her article. I couldn't take it anymore once she started to destroy 'IB'. I was totally on board with her words about Roth, but once she started to list the reason why 'IB' was so awful, I tuned out. I found her opinions on the film to be rather ridiculous.

It never works when you take the "look, this film fucking sucks, no matter what you think, and this is why" approach. It's just condensing and unintelligent prose.

Posted by liveforever Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:42 PM

comment #22

Geoff Author Profile Page says ...

"Which brings us to Inglourious Basterds. As a whole, it wasn't good. Many people whose opinions I respect spilled adoration on it like the fucking Magi. I don't get it. It was dull, and smug, and plodding. "

I enjoyed the film more than she did, but I can't really argue with her. IB is overrated.

Posted by Geoff Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:48 PM

comment #23

Abbey Normal Author Profile Page says ...

I hated Eli Roth in IB, but Adam Sandler would have been even worse. What's the deal with this stunt casting shit? Just get somebody who's right for the part.

Posted by Abbey Normal Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:49 PM

comment #24

Glenn Kenny Author Profile Page says ...

Stopped reading when she equated Eli with "Portnoy"-era Philip Roth. Sorry, but "zappy" and "flavorful" doesn't excuse unbelievably fucking stupid.

Posted by Glenn Kenny Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:51 PM

comment #25

crazynine Author Profile Page says ...

I hate reading about QT or IB on this site only because the commenters line up in predictable love/hate ways.

I really enjoy QT and his films. Some more than others. I think he makes some really interesting-- and more importantly, *entertaining*-- choices. He also does some stupid things, but hey, that's art. Not everything succeeds, not everything fails.

The Eli Roth thing, I don't get at all. Nothing about him or his career has appealed to me. (Well, that "Thanksgiving" trailer in Grindhouse was as funny and inspired as the rest of them). QT wants him in the film, fine by me, his call, but honestly, it mattered to me not one bit.

As for IB, some of it I flat-out love. Everything Lanza, the tavern betrayal sequence, the Melanie Laurent stuff, and the sheer insanity of it all, that's all great. Alas, as noted, the actual Basterds deal was completely inconsequential, and actually a subtraction from what was good about the film. And I say that as a huge fan of watching Brad Pitt have fun in a movie.

I don't get how in the hell the film was nominated for a BP. Maybe with 10 spots it makes it in, but even then it's a stretch. QT has done better, and I'm sure he'll do better in the future... for as great as parts of IB was, it was just that: parts, not a sum.

Posted by crazynine Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 12:59 PM

comment #26

corey3rd Author Profile Page says ...

Roth is to Tarantino what Ma$e was to Sean P. Daddy Combs - a way to prove he's not the least talented actor on the screen

Posted by corey3rd Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 1:06 PM

comment #27

gogocrank10 Author Profile Page says ...

Don't forget that QT produced both "Hostel" flicks, so his love of Roth goes way back. In fact, "Cabin Fever" is pretty much the only thing he's done with no QT connection, and even then, I bet there's a QT connection.


"IG" minus the titular Basterds would have been a better movie. Actually, I would have liked it best if the Basterds, Roth and all, didn't show up til the final act, since they add little to the rest beyond a couple of set pieces, one good, one not (the bat sequence being the latter), and a bunch of pointless (as opposed to Waltz's pointed) talk.

Posted by gogocrank10 Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 1:15 PM

comment #28

Mark Author Profile Page says ...

Szpilman with the bat would have equaled Zuko/Manero twisting at Jack Rabbit Slim's.

Posted by Mark Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 2:05 PM

comment #29

LexG Author Profile Page says ...

Again, how does this chick have a blog?

Like, how do you get one that's a SITE like HE or MCN or this broad's, as opposed to some Blogger site that isn't as easy to post comments on?

I'm smarter and more awesome than this chick. So is Eli Roth.

Posted by LexG Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 2:06 PM

comment #30

THE MovieBob Author Profile Page says ...

Lex-

Apply. Chud and AICN and such are putting up "looking for writers" blurbs at least two or three times a year...

Posted by THE MovieBob Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 2:19 PM

comment #31

LexG Author Profile Page says ...

All I wanted out of life was to maybe be a supporting character actor like John Diehl or Burt Young, maybe date an actress or two, and hang out with cool, likeminded guys like QT and RR and Eli Roth. I'd totally fit in with those guys, we could watch Cannibal Holocaust over a few beers then call over some actress friends and tell them to show us their feet. It would be THE LIFE.

How do you get to have showbiz friends? Or any friends?

Posted by LexG Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 2:42 PM

comment #32

Colin Author Profile Page says ...

Before this turns into a thread about Lex killing himself.

This woman has appeared on FOX News, Mr. Wells, how has that not factored into your opinion of her zappy writing?

Posted by Colin Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 2:55 PM

comment #33

televisiontears Author Profile Page says ...

LexG is smarter and more awesome than this chick and wants to have showbiz friends.

Posted by televisiontears Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 3:22 PM

comment #34

Big Black Author Profile Page says ...

Linking to a terribly-written, whiny axe-grinder of a blog piece like that doesn't exactly reflect all that well on your own criticisms of the film. The writer comes off as petty and shallow. So?

Posted by Big Black Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 3:32 PM

comment #35

dangovich Author Profile Page says ...

The Bear Jew should have been Saul Stein:

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0825627/

Posted by dangovich Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 3:48 PM

comment #36

Ray DeRousse Author Profile Page says ...

She misses the entire reason why Roth was cast in that role: so he could stand there and smile when Pitt says the word "torture" in that debriefing scene. And that is one of the most annyoing moments I had at the movies in 2009.

Posted by Ray DeRousse Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 4:16 PM

comment #37

Gordn27 Author Profile Page says ...

How could anybody make it more than two paragraphs through that diatribe? Here's a tip, Internet-haters: if you're going to criticize Quentin Tarantino, you should be able to write at least a basic, interesting sentence first.

Posted by Gordn27 Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 4:39 PM

comment #38

nemo Author Profile Page says ...

She did come up with the great phrase "Quentin Tarantino's shoulder monkey."

Posted by nemo Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 4:45 PM

comment #39

LexG Author Profile Page says ...

Hostel and Hostel II are both kind of subversive and brilliant.

The first 20, 30 minutes of the first movie is one of the best sleazy frat comedies ever... Roth is practically egging us on to BEG for this hateful, xenophobic, sexist meatheads to get their comeuppance. He lets the dude-bro antics go on so long and so far, that it's like watching The Spur Posse... if you're rooting for their torturers in the intense second half, you might almost have a point. Yet Jay Hernandez's performance is strong enough to make the empathy switch work... And I think the last 20, 30 minutes of that movie are really unsung. If critics were such GIANT PUSSIES about torture and violence, they'd recognize the sly wit and the gross-out fun of all that.

Hostel 2 is something an inversion, the central very likable female victims getting an equal amount of screen time, and Roth softens us for the kill by making them so genuinely disarming and likable; Even the "bad girl," played by Bijou Phillips, is rather sweet and strong. When we get to the dark stuff, we feel real intensity because Roth focuses on their longings, their passions, and their camraderie; At the same time, he gives us two great, distinct villains in Roger Bart and Richard Burgi. I think the flip is pretty obvious and we all see it coming-- that the nervous, conscience-ridden Bart ultimately goes apeshit while all-talk Burgi can't go through with it...

But their are SO many smart ideas about exploitation and gender and sexism and male insecurity masquerading as privilege in the sequel... Everyone got so squeamish about that Matarrazzo sequence that they overlooked how many great themes and how much social commentary Roth worked in.

GOOD DIRECTOR.

Posted by LexG Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 5:10 PM

comment #40

kamichojin Author Profile Page says ...

Gogo, Cabin Fever didn't need the QT connection since it had a glowing endorsement from Lord of the Rings era Peter Jackson.

The only one of his films I had no use for was Hostel. I made the mistake of seeing it right before the equally brutal but far superior Wolf Lake. Those characters were developed well enough that you cared about them. I couldn't wait for all the annoying entitled self-important douchebags (in other words little Roth proxies) in Hostel to bet killed so I could get the movie over with.

His Thanksgiving trailer is by far his finest work.

Posted by kamichojin Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 5:10 PM

comment #41

LexG Author Profile Page says ...

I kinda wonder if Robert Rodriguez sits around watching IB and it's like Arsenio in his gameroom watching Eddie clownin' with Mar-'an in Boomerang and Life and the A-Man's all WHAT ABOUT MEEEEEEE?

Posted by LexG Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 5:23 PM

comment #42

JD Author Profile Page says ...

Pretty shamefully stupid article if you ask me. Is it possible that Roth is neither brilliant nor an imbecile? He's clearly sharper and more knowledgeable than most of the filmmakers turning out horror films these days, but he's also an egomaniacal whore for attention. But most importantly, he's an amusing and entertaining presence on the Hollywood scene and a worthy Robin to Tarantino's movie geek Batman. This writer clearly has jealousy issues.

Posted by JD Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 5:46 PM

comment #43

Palermo Author Profile Page says ...

Ti West, along with Alexandre Aja (who may have slipped in estimation a little with Mirrors and his script for P2), is the most promising recent horror director, and one of the more technically skilled.

Except for the Thanksgiving trailer, Roth's movies haven't been great. But at least they have a sense of humour, which elevates them from a lot of their brethren. His "Bear Jew" in Inglourious Basterds is a figurehead of the weakest thread of that movie. Maybe the author is taking it out on him.

Posted by Palermo Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 5:50 PM

comment #44

DeeZee Author Profile Page says ...

Though, to be fair to Roth, the bulk of QT's career has to do with Ringo Lam's movie, Roger's screenplay, and making people believe he's "innovative". Though having seem in person, Roth comes off less smug and shrill than QT.

crazynine: "I don't get how in the hell the film was nominated for a BP."

The nazi theme gives him a "get out of washed-up hacks club" card over his other "homages".

Anyway, Snyder loves Hooters.
http://www.themoviebox.net/movies/2010/Legend-Of-The-Guardians/trailer.php
New Romero Zombie thing.
http://www.themoviebox.net/movies/2010/Survival-Of-The-Dead/trailer.php
Gosling+Carrell: together at last?
http://www.darkhorizons.com/news/16520/ryan-gosling-steve-carell-teaming-up-
But where can you find a pool on the Silk Road?
http://www.darkhorizons.com/news/16524/francis-lawrence-helms-marco-polo-feature
New Shadow reboot director + studio?
http://www.aintitcool.com/node/44167
Jackman goes to Selma.
http://www.darkhorizons.com/news/16522/jackman-fights-for-rights-in-selma-
More "tweaking" from Summit.
http://www.darkhorizons.com/news/16523/slade-up-for-shadow-eclipse-gets-new-edit

Posted by DeeZee Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 6:53 PM

comment #45

DeeZee Author Profile Page says ...

*seen him*

Posted by DeeZee Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 6:54 PM

comment #46

mtgilchrist Author Profile Page says ...

1. Shockingly, I agree with LexG for once, about the entertainment value, if only some of the subtext of Hostel and Hostel 2. The movies play like comedies where the gore is the punchline, rather than the setup, exposition, and everything else.

2. PCP, giving Stephen King credit as any authority on movies disqualifies your argument completely. That repetitive douchebag put Last House on the Left and 2012 on his Top Ten of '09, and the former is unwatchable and pointless shit. Not to mention he doesn't like Kubrick's Shining.

3. This article is pointless sniping from somebody whose soapbox is bigger than their ability to mount a real argument. No matter what it's called, IB isn't trying to be about the Basterds - or else there would have been more of them in it. To dismiss the texture and substance of what Tarantino was doing with his extended scenes, not to mention to ignore the collective acting (even if you don't like Roth, whose contributions are of negligible importance) or the directing or pacing, nullifies any real critique of the film. Especially since this is just a self-important takedown piece; I mean, seriously, what impact is this supposed to have?

Posted by mtgilchrist Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 7:01 PM

comment #47

DeeZee Author Profile Page says ...

mt: I don't blame him for disliking Kubrick's Shining. The book had the better ending.

Posted by DeeZee Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 7:14 PM

comment #48

DeeZee Author Profile Page says ...

Oh, and Sucker Punch and Green Lantern are gonna be in 3D. http://tinyurl.com/ygtjfhs
And Ebert gave Ghost Writer 4 stars and Alice 3 stars. Anyone wanna join his club?
http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20100303/FEATURED/100309996

Posted by DeeZee Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 7:18 PM

comment #49

lipranzer Author Profile Page says ...

One of my co-workers thinks IB is overrated because of Roth's performance as well. I don't think he's that great, he certainly comes off annoying in interviews, and I think CABIN FEVER is overrated. However, he's really not in the movie for that much. All due respect, it's like saying you didn't like AN EDUCATION because you can't stand Emma Thompson.

Posted by lipranzer Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 8:27 PM

comment #50

goodvibe61 Author Profile Page says ...

DeeZee: That is so tired, breaking out what's by now amazingly weak sauce about Ringo Lam, or Roger Avery being the real writer of Pulp Fiction. That is all so clearly such a bunch of nonsense that it reveals just how lazy you are around here.

Do better.

Posted by goodvibe61 Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 8:54 PM

comment #51

a1 Author Profile Page says ...

"However, he's really not in the movie for that much. All due respect, it's like saying you didn't like AN EDUCATION because you can't stand Emma Thompson."

No, it's like watching "An Education" and the Emma Thompson role's being played by Jenny McCarthy

Posted by a1 Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 9:08 PM

comment #52

LexG Author Profile Page says ...

Gilchrist: The '09 Last House is excellent. The original is one of the best movies ever made, but the remake is a worthy update, very exciting and well-acted, especially by Tony Goldwyn and Garrett Dillahunt. The latter's performance in particular gives it more heft and worth than your write-off.

I know from your SMF with Poland and Drew that you are SUPER squeamish, or more specifically you see everything with your sunshine-and-rainbows girlfriend Jen Y. who's never had a dark or depressed moment in her life and has never had anything go wrong, ever... But sometimes you need to EMBRACE CINEMATIC VIOLENCE as being the ULTIMATE in filmic excitement, because it allows you to viscerally work out your hatred and rage.

Posted by LexG Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 9:09 PM

comment #53

BurmaShave Author Profile Page says ...

Lex, apropos of nothing, for reasons passing human understanding I just watched a few of your own youtube things. I'd never seen the Poland vs. Wells thing somehow. "I've never heard of a dreidel, hombre" had me cackling. Truly heroic work.

Posted by BurmaShave Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 10:05 PM

comment #54

televisiontears Author Profile Page says ...

Lex, great points on #39. I feel like first Hostel is one of the most misunderstood horror films of all time. Once we get to the torture chamber, the visual callbacks to the whorehouse in Amsterdam are striking. The dragged-down-the-hall sequence in the torture chamber almost perfectly mirrors the hall sequence in Amsterdam. It's a bit on-the-nose, but still. There's a lot of subtext to that film.

Posted by televisiontears Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 10:11 PM

comment #55

DeeZee Author Profile Page says ...

goodvibe: "That is so tired, breaking out what's by now amazingly weak sauce about Ringo Lam, or Roger Avery being the real writer of Pulp Fiction. "

Not as tired as him making the same movie for the last 18 years.

Posted by DeeZee Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 10:29 PM

comment #56

Chinaski94 Author Profile Page says ...

DZ

You're an idiot.

Avary is the hack. The most noteworthy thing he's done since Pulp Fiction earned him a stay in jail.

Posted by Chinaski94 Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 10:47 PM

comment #57

BurmaShave Author Profile Page says ...

Daniel try getting some sleep for once instead of your usual inaccurate and inane blather. Chinaski, that's not entirely fair, KILLING ZOE sucks but THE RULES OF ATTRACTION is a fairly decent Ellis adaptation, with some solid performances out of surprising people.

Posted by BurmaShave Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 10:49 PM

comment #58

mtgilchrist Author Profile Page says ...

Except for animal stuff like the turtle in Cannibal Holocaust, I'm not squeamish, Lex. And there are some violent/ superviolent films that I enjoy as a matter of entertainment. But there's nothing redeeming about the Last House remake. I agree Dillahunt is great as he always is, but it cuts out any cultural or social or even humanistic subtext and documents pointless brutality, and I have no interest in that, as a critic or even as a general moviegoer.

Posted by mtgilchrist Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 10:50 PM

comment #59

DeeZee Author Profile Page says ...

Burma: You forgot about Silent Hill.

Posted by DeeZee Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 10:57 PM

comment #60

LexG Author Profile Page says ...

RULES OF ATTRACTION POWER.

SOSSAMON POWER. BIEL POWER. BOSWORTH POWER. ENDLESS bowing.

Mtg: Cannibal Holocaust is a MASTERPIECE. And there's no such thing as "pointless brutality." There's always a point to cinematic brutality. The point is that it's AWESOME and gives you a visceral charge. You're telling me you weren't shaking with pent-up glee when Goldwin was getting his revenge? The ONLY sour note in the LH remake is that dumb microwave gag, but even that's immediately rescued by the AWESOME Death in Vegas song over the end credits, which sent me out grinning ear to ear and knowing I had just seen the Wicked Shit. BOW:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oXHjo826R2k

Posted by LexG Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 11:24 PM

comment #61

LexG Author Profile Page says ...

Also Sara Paxton (AQUAMARINE POWER) is SMOOOOKING HOT in Last House in the early scenes in her LITTLE SHORTS and BIKINI and BARE FEET. PAXTON POWER. AQUAMARINE POWER.

Posted by LexG Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 11:27 PM

comment #62

Chinaski94 Author Profile Page says ...

DZ

Nobody is talking about Silent Hill. It's done. Forgotten. A bad adaptation of a stupid video game.

Yeah, he's original.

Posted by Chinaski94 Author Profile Page at March 4, 2010 11:40 PM

comment #63

LexG Author Profile Page says ...

Silent Hill was by the Brotherhood of the Wolf guy, just written by Avary.

Actually can't believe Master of the Arcane DZ isn't making a case for Avary's obscure sophomore slump directorial effort, MR. STITCH, which went DTV.

I'll give Silent Hill SOME props... It's the most cold, ugly, mean-spirited and unpleasant movie in recent history; It was like an uglier, more off-putting version of a Tarsem flick-- cold, inhumane, ghastly in that horrific flesh-ripping Clive Barker way. Not entertaining or scary in the least, but certainly gray and vile, if that's what it was going for.

It's the movie SAW detractors must be seeing, because Saw (or Hostel) just seem kind of goofy and fun and over the top... Silent Hill is legitimately unpleasant and foul... You KNOW something's miserable if even *I* am put off by its hateful vibe. And not knowing ANYTHING about videogames, I can't even picture how it is one.

Posted by LexG Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 1:42 AM

comment #64

shahriar khan Author Profile Page says ...

Awesome post dude. Thanks for sharing.

Help

Posted by shahriar khan Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 2:48 AM

comment #65

DeeZee Author Profile Page says ...

China: "A bad adaptation of a stupid video game."

Not that I was fond of the video game myself, but I think the fans of that series would disagree with you about the source material being stupid. As for it being a bad adaptation, it's pretty fucking authentic to me.

"Yeah, he's original."

Well, he did come up with the templates for Pulp Fiction, True Romance, and that Top Gun line first, so...

Lex: "Silent Hill was by the Brotherhood of the Wolf guy, just written by Avary."

Yeah, but Avary played the games and did the scouting.

"And not knowing ANYTHING about videogames, I can't even picture how it is one."

Footage of the remake of the first one. http://www.gametrailers.com/game/silent-hill-shattered-memories/11129

Posted by DeeZee Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 3:55 AM

comment #66

JChasse Author Profile Page says ...

"I think the fans of that series would disagree with you about the source material being stupid."

By that logic, fans of everything disagree with you about whatever you happen to say is stupid at the time. So does that mean that we should disreagard your opinions?

Posted by JChasse Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 5:22 AM

comment #67

BurmaShave Author Profile Page says ...

"Yeah, but Avary played the games and did the scouting."

you really have no idea how things work do you.

Posted by BurmaShave Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 5:36 AM

comment #68

corey3rd Author Profile Page says ...

cabin fever played on a connection with David Lynch

Posted by corey3rd Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 7:07 AM

comment #69

Chinaski94 Author Profile Page says ...

" As for it being a bad adaptation, it's pretty fucking authentic to me."

This statement would imply that your opinion carries weight with anybody. And who is still talking about Silent Hill? Nobody.

"Well, he did come up with the templates for Pulp Fiction, True Romance, and that Top Gun line first, so... "

Yeah, the templates for those films were not original. It was the actual execution that made those films what they were.

"Yeah, but Avary played the games and did the scouting."

In between drinks, I suppose.

Posted by Chinaski94 Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 8:41 AM

comment #70

Luke Y. Thompson Author Profile Page says ...

Silent Hill rules. just bought the DVD for $4.

Only problem I have with it is that foreign directors never notice when their English-speaking actors' accents are all over the place.

Even detractors would have to admit it has some of the most original onscreen monsters in AGES. Yeah, they mostly came from the games, but nothing quite like Pyramid Head or that Tortured Souls dude in the bathroom has been in a MOVIE since Hellraiser.

Todd - if you're not squeamish, watch ANTICHRIST.

Lex - Last house '09 is a GIANT COP-OUT by letting the girl victim be still alive at the end, rather than killed upfront.

Posted by Luke Y. Thompson Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 10:22 AM

comment #71

liveforever Author Profile Page says ...

The comments section of HE would be infinitely better if DeeZee and LexG were not allowed to be a part of it. Links, rambling about actresses, just total garbage.

Posted by liveforever Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 10:22 AM

comment #72

bluefugue Author Profile Page says ...

Lex is better than DZ but the "power" trope is getting pretty tired.

Posted by bluefugue Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 12:04 PM

comment #73

Colin Author Profile Page says ...

@DZ

The Shining book ending is better?! Have you seen Kubrick's film and read the book?

Posted by Colin Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 12:57 PM

comment #74

DeeZee Author Profile Page says ...

Burma: "you really have no idea how things work do you. "

I do know that you have to know and appreciate what the source material's about to be able to do it justice.

China: "And who is still talking about Silent Hill? Nobody."

And no one's still talking about Reservoir Dogs and Pulp Fiction, so...

"Yeah, the templates for those films were not original. "

Compared to what QT did with them, they were original.

"In between drinks, I suppose. "

Nope, he owns his own arcade machines.

Colin: Yep, and?

Posted by DeeZee Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 2:44 PM

comment #75

Noah Cross Author Profile Page says ...

And no one's still talking about Reservoir Dogs and Pulp Fiction, so...

Obviously, you're still talking about them. I just read a Mick LaSalle article about the Oscars that said Pulp Fiction should have got best picture. I just read an article about songs in film that mentioned in "Stuck in the Middle with You" & Reservior Dogs. So, yeah, not exactly no one.

Posted by Noah Cross Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 3:27 PM

comment #76

DeeZee Author Profile Page says ...

"Obviously, you're still talking about them."

I am? Nope, It's more like I'm talking about the films remade into PF.

"I just read a Mick LaSalle article about the Oscars that said Pulp Fiction should have got best picture. I just read an article about songs in film that mentioned in "Stuck in the Middle with You" & Reservior Dogs. So, yeah, not exactly no one."

That's just Oscar-related talk.

Posted by DeeZee Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 5:59 PM

comment #77

CitizenKanedforChewingGum Author Profile Page says ...

1) SH has never been an "arcade game," at least until 2007, at which point the movie had already been released. Do you mean "console?"

2) Shattered Memories is NOT technically a remake of the original game. You really have some complete mental block on the meaning of the word "remake," don't you? I don't think you've ever used it correctly in your entire life.

3) What SPECIFICALLY did you prefer about the ending of the book The Shining, as opposed to the movie? Yeah, I'm calling you out on this. If you can't sit through 2-hour movies to discuss them here, I really don't see you hunkering down with big fat Stephen King novels, either.

4) You're still talking about RD and PF. In fact, you've probably mentioned these films (unprompted, no less) more than any other single commenter over the past couple years. They seem very important to you.

Posted by CitizenKanedforChewingGum Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 9:18 PM

comment #78

Gordn27 Author Profile Page says ...

"It's more like I'm talking about the films remade into PF."

No, it isn't. It is nothing like that. In this thread, you have not mentioned a single movie as an inspiration for Pulp Fiction. You've just talked about Roger Avary's script and how it's so much better than the movie. How that could be possible, when even Avary himself has said the only segment he had a hand in the script of was the middle, is beyond any rational person -- so I'd love to hear your specifics.

Posted by Gordn27 Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 9:31 PM

comment #79

Chinaski94 Author Profile Page says ...

"And no one's still talking about Reservoir Dogs and Pulp Fiction, so..."

Actually they are. So there's that...

"Compared to what QT did with them, they were original."

That makes zero sense.

Posted by Chinaski94 Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 9:45 PM

comment #80

DeeZee Author Profile Page says ...

Kane:

I'm talking about a different arcade game he blogged about a while back, to show that he's a gamer, too.

"What SPECIFICALLY did you prefer about the ending of the book The Shining, as opposed to the movie? Yeah, I'm calling you out on this."

I don't buy that Jack would just run around in the snow until he froze to death. Makes him look way stupider than he should be, considering he fucking trapped his own family in the meat room only a few frames earlier.

Gordon: "You've just talked about Roger Avary's script and how it's so much better than the movie. "

I didn't say better. I said more original.

Posted by DeeZee Author Profile Page at March 5, 2010 10:01 PM

comment #81

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