Haywire Knocks It

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I'm too whipped to write anything about Steven Soderbergh's Haywire, which screened tonight at AFIfest to a wildly revved and delighted crowd. If the Sean Connery-Robert Shaw train compartment fight in From Russia With Love is your idea of a classic, Haywire will throttle you right down to the marrow. I've always felt that Angelina Jolie was too small and skinny to kick large male ass, but I believe in Gina Carano's aggressive abilities 110%.

Asian martial-arts films can go suck it on their knees, but this movie is the shit.

A bit more writing, another video and several photos tomorrow morning. But for now it's safe to say that Haywire is the smartest, most genuinely thrilling and involving and satisfying kick-ass, faux-exploitation action thriller I've seen in a long time. Carano, bless her, beats her way through the entire male cast, and I believed each and every battle.

The above clip contains Soderbergh's opening remarks before the film began.

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Posted by Jeffrey Wells on November 7, 2011 at 12:31 AM

comment #1

Sams says ...

While Jolie is unquestionably thin, I don't recall you raising issues re her size while you were the incumbent president of the Salt fan club. From early reviews this looks like one Soderbergh fans will love, the public not so much.

Posted by Sams at November 7, 2011 3:50 AM

comment #2

Gabe@ThePlaylist says ...

Yeah, FUCK Asia!

Posted by Gabe@ThePlaylist at November 7, 2011 4:19 AM

comment #3

Hallick says ...

"Asian martial-arts films can go suck it on their knees, but this movie is the shit. "

And....95% of the readership hops off of your "Haywire" buzz right about here. This is the equivalent of saying spaghetti westerns can go fist themselves with a cactus plant or John Woo can go eat turds with Raymond Burr (actually, it's more like saying "George Romero movies can go rape a water buffalo, The Walking Dead is the shit!").

Jesus, reading that line was like watching Jan Wohl slag the entire Farrelly brothers body of work while heaping praise on "Because I Said So".

Posted by Hallick at November 7, 2011 4:47 AM

comment #4

corey3rd says ...

You lost me at Soderbergh.

Posted by corey3rd at November 7, 2011 6:40 AM

comment #5

JR says ...

Jeff was "over the moon" for that steaming pile "Contagion," so it is clear that he lacks objectivity on his evaluations of Soderbergh films. Still, I will probably see this one.

Posted by JR at November 7, 2011 6:48 AM

comment #6

Alboone says ...

Carano is hot as hell and tough as nails, but does she have charisma? Can she act? The thing with chop-socky actors is that most of them either acted like stones or deers caught in the headlights. Is there a character there for me to hang onto? Fights are cool, I know she can do that, but does she have the other "thing" as well that translates into ACTION STAR!?

Posted by Alboone at November 7, 2011 6:54 AM

comment #7

lbeale says ...

If it weren't for Asian martial arts films, there would be no 'Haywire.'
So yeah, fuck John Woo, Johnny To, Bruce Lee, Jet Li, King Hu, Zhang Yimou, and all those other talent-less people making those movies.
Really, Jeff. Get a grip.

Posted by lbeale at November 7, 2011 7:32 AM

comment #8

Tallguy says ...

As Wells correctly points out, the fights in "Haywire" are more early Bond fights which predate any of the other directors mentioned. I love a good martial arts flick more than anyone but "Haywire" is a different beast. The trailer emphasizes the action beats but it's much more "French Connection" than "Hard Boiled" for comparison.

Posted by Tallguy at November 7, 2011 8:32 AM

comment #9

Gabe@ThePlaylist says ...

I don't know anything about this cinematic world, so it must suck!

Why are so many film writers afraid to acknowledge their blind spots? Everyone has one. I don't see what's wrong with saying, "I've never seen many Asian action pictures, and the ones I have seen turned me off. Because I have not applied myself to the genre, I remain, sadly, ignorant about it." That's a lot more worthwhile reading than, "Eh, whatever, fuck this, not interesting."

Posted by Gabe@ThePlaylist at November 7, 2011 9:16 AM

comment #10

Ponderer says ...

I remember an article talking about how Kael schooled Siskel and Ebert for looking down at Asian martial arts films. Would that she was still around for a second round of shred-ripping...

Posted by Ponderer at November 7, 2011 9:31 AM

comment #11

watchingyoubeytch says ...

i would take skinny jolie over gina but my main problem is steven!

Posted by watchingyoubeytch at November 7, 2011 10:22 AM

comment #12

Ray says ...

My question: how does Carano get a body that athletic while smoking eight packs a day? Because that's how she got that voice, right?

Posted by Ray at November 7, 2011 10:30 AM

comment #13

George Prager says ...

And remember that that fight in RUSSIA happened because Shaw ordered the wrong wine.

Posted by George Prager at November 7, 2011 10:54 AM

comment #14

Colin says ...

I'm not all that familiar with Asian films but Oldboy definitely has turned me off from going through more new age ones. Thankfully, Kurosawa and Lee make up for the gap in quality.

Posted by Colin at November 7, 2011 11:02 AM

comment #15

Rashad says ...

That Connery fight was weak. Should have used the end of Emperor of The North or Marvin in Point Break at the club. He really punched a guy in the balls

Posted by Rashad at November 7, 2011 11:13 AM

comment #16

gooddog says ...

"I'm not all that familiar with Asian films but Oldboy definitely has turned me off from going through more new age ones. Thankfully, Kurosawa and Lee make up for the gap in quality."

Spike Lee, director of the Oldboy remake, is not Asian.

Wait -- oh, Ang Lee.

Posted by gooddog at November 7, 2011 11:17 AM

comment #17

Colin says ...

Yes, I was referring to Ang Lee. I don't think anyone here would associate Spike Lee with anything other than 25th Hour.

Posted by Colin at November 7, 2011 11:28 AM

comment #18

Edward says ...

I can't believe Jeffrey is writing about classic Woo or director's like Miike. Asian martial arts films can be mindless fun and there are some great ones, but there are more dumb ones than great. "Oldboy" was disturbing, but great cinema.

Posted by Edward at November 7, 2011 11:46 AM

comment #19

LexG says ...

Dying to see this, but I don't really find Gina attractive, plus in the trailer she seems to have ONE facial expression, this smug smirk that belies a certain discomfort on camera in close-ups...

Which makes it the trailer laugh of the year, time and time out, at the beginning of that trailer when Channing Tatum just hauls off and pops her in the face. It's funny every time.

Posted by LexG at November 7, 2011 12:32 PM

comment #20

THE MovieBob says ...

Soderbergh is innocent until proven guilty, but most Western filmmakers - even good ones - have NO idea how to shoot martial-arts fight scenes. They're too used to having to shoot and edit to make it look like actors can actually fight, so they always end up burying otherwise good kung-fu behind a fog of fast-edits, close-ups and shaky-cam.

Asian filmmakers, whatever their other individual failings, generally come from cultures where this is part of the "soup," so they know how to do it right: Long takes, wide-angles, let the audience SEE the move/countermove/stance/style back-and-forth that's the whole bloody POINT of the scene.

Compare THIS, frequently called Jackie Chan's best fight scene (ignore, obviously, the awful music): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H6eC-BAsVdQ

To THIS piece of shit, under similar conditions, from one of the "Rush Hour" abortions: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WSkJL1mBHMw

Posted by THE MovieBob at November 7, 2011 12:51 PM

comment #21

Gabe@ThePlaylist says ...

Someone just said they were turned off on ANY new Asian films by OLDBOY?

Yeah, I was bored by ZODIAC, so no more movies about white people for me!

Posted by Gabe@ThePlaylist at November 7, 2011 1:02 PM

comment #22

corey3rd says ...

If you want to watch women kicking guys around - get the Roger Corman Lethal Ladies Collection. This is nice, but it doesn't compare to the naked kung fu of Firecracker.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Qer1Lnwe94

Posted by corey3rd at November 7, 2011 1:04 PM

comment #23

LexG says ...

Yeah, MovieBOB, Asian people are MAGICAL.

Asian movies suck dick. Oldboy is good, but mostly I just don't care. Plus I like looking at white people better, sue me.

Posted by LexG at November 7, 2011 1:20 PM

comment #24

corey3rd says ...

It's a white girl doing Karate and destroying a diner - just like in Haywire

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DcNOtbpomJo&feature=relmfu

Posted by corey3rd at November 7, 2011 2:22 PM

comment #25

George Prager says ...

corey3rd wants to be the DeeZee of Roger Corman movies.

Posted by George Prager at November 7, 2011 3:30 PM

comment #26

clockwork taxi says ...

Zodiac boring? Lordy, you and I drink from a different cup. THANK GOD.

Posted by clockwork taxi at November 7, 2011 4:22 PM

comment #27

raquelswell says ...

How is it possible that Fassbender looks hot in Fish Tank but somehow seems old and feverish looking everywhere else?

Anyway, there are other actresses that beat up people in movies. Angelina Jolie isn't the only one. What's appealing about Jolie is that she's feminine and beautiful and charismatic. Gina Carano is a guy in a dress.

Posted by raquelswell at November 7, 2011 4:25 PM

comment #28

Colin says ...

I meant new age Asian genre flicks, Gabe. There's no need to be an ass.

Posted by Colin at November 7, 2011 6:51 PM

comment #29

THE MovieBob says ...

No, Lex. Asian filmmakers simply tend to shoot martial-arts fight sequences better because the cinema/theater traditions of their respective countries tend to be more steeped in it. That's all.

Posted by THE MovieBob at November 7, 2011 7:13 PM

comment #30

Rashad says ...

Wachowskis > all

Posted by Rashad at November 7, 2011 8:28 PM

comment #31

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