Hating the puerile Charlie’s Angels brand has been a default passion among persons of breeding and cultivation for over 40 years. The original mid-to-late ’70s ABC TV series…synthetic garbage. The universally reviled McG-directed reboots, Charlie’s Angels (’00) and Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle (’03), delivered instant lobotomies to untold millions. Drew Barrymore, Cameron Diaz, Lucy Liu and Bill Murray as sidekick “Bosley”…please.
Yesterday it was announced that Kristen Stewart, Naomi Scott and Ella Balinska will topline a 2019 reboot. It’ll directed and co-written by Elizabeth Banks (who will also play Bosley). Another female empowerment saga, kick-ass lust objects, presumably to be infused with a partly lesbian vibe, at least as far as Stewart’s character is concerned…right? You can’t release an action flick about a trio of crime-fighting heterosexual honeys in 2019. Banks will have no choice but to get with the program.
In the original series and two McG versions the possessive apostrophe meant that the girls belonged in a sense to John Forsythe‘s “Charlie,” their suave provider, protector and benefactor. The implied message was “we love you, foxy ladies, as you bust the bad guys and stand up for justice, but at the end of the day Uncle Charlie pays the bills, steers the ship and knows what’s best.” So will the Banks’ version use the same unseen, paternalistic Charlie as a provider of guidance and perspective? Or will Charlie be a woman? I can’t imagine the newbie (which will open on 9.27.19) going back to that old McG well.