I had a serious thing for Kathryn Harrold back in the day, particularly after she costarred with Albert Brooks in Modern Romance (’81).

Consequently there was no one in the known universe who was more bummed out than myself when Harrold played a doctor who becomes Luciano Pavarotti‘s lover in Yes, Giorgio (’82).

The images that flashed through my mind as I contemplated…I don’t need to elaborate here.

It was ridiculous, of course, that I, a mere journalist and movie hound with a full understanding of how and why various Hollywood films are thrown together, would feel actually upset, but I honestly felt like a jilted lover when Harrold did this. Jilted and appalled that she would…I can’t even think it, much less say it. I was pretty much groaning in pain.

Suffice to say that Yes, Giorgio single-handedly terminated the idea of a slender, drop-dead beautiful actress like Harrold indulging in breathless, around-the-world sexual activity with a gifted artist-elephant like Pavarotti…even now these images are injecting emotional pain into my system.

Harrold was 30 when Yes, Giorgio was shot. She is thankfully still with us and working as a Los Angeles-based Marriage and Family Therapist. Pavarotti was 45 during filming. He died from pancreatic cancer in 2007, at age 72.

I wasn’t the only one who suffered cardiac arrest when Yes, Giorgio opened, of course. Pretty much the entire world rejected it. It cost around $19 million to produce, and brought in $2.3 million. It was estimated to have lost $45 million and change.

Joe and Jane Popcorn to Hollywood slickos in the early ’80s: Don’t ever ask us to pay to see a fat bearded guy, however famous or charming or wealthy or gifted, boning Kathryn Harrold or for that matter anybody else in her physical attractiveness class. Never do this again…ever.