When do boys start routinely discussing infidelity or impulsive assignations among their parents’ friends? I wouldn’t know but I remember flipping through the pages of a nudie mag when I was 8 or 9.

I distinctly recall a chat during a third-grade recess. I didn’t actually say anything — I just listened.

Kid #1: “I was at Hornbeck’s last Sunday and his mom’s hair is brown and his dad’s hair is kinda sandy. So how come Hornbeck’s hair is red?”

Kid #2: “Red-haired milkman.”

This dates me, of course. I can’t precisely recall when milk delivery guys began to disappear but they were certainly gone by the time of “Bringing It All Back Home.”

My class visited a milk bottling plant when I was 10 or 11. It was during this excursion that I first realized that each and every cow ends up being slaughtered. Nice feeling. Welcome to the world. little calf! When the time comes you’re going to be murdered. Same with pigs and sheep.