President-elect Joe Biden has announced he will ask Americans to wear masks for his first 100 days after he takes office. I’m guessing he’ll also be asking Americans to maintain social distancing, wash their hands frequently and generally play it safe as far as not spreading anything around. Whoa…radical!

I’ve been wearing a mask inside supermarkets and CVS stores, maintaining careful distances and washing my hands for nearly 11 months now. This is a big deal? To millions of morons living in certain portions of the U.S.A. and to young party animals who regard themselves as more or less immune, it is.

Bumblefucks have been behaving with such breathtaking stupidity for so many months, it’s staggering. Biden asking them to wear masks for 100 days is almost certainly going to be received as “the government is looking to take our freedom away!”

Biden to CNN’s Jake Tapper: “Just 100 days to mask. Not forever. 100 days. And I think we’ll see a significant reduction.”

“Biden said that where he has authority, such as in the realm of federal buildings or interstate transportation on airplanes and buses, he will issue a standing order that masks must be worn.”

Biden also said he’s asked Dr. Anthony Fauci to be a chief medical adviser and part of his Covid-19 response team when his administration begins next year.

It was announced earlier today that Warner Bros.’ entire 2021 slate will open day-and-date in theatres and HBO Max. Yeah, you heard me — Denis Villeneuve’s Dune, Baz Luhrman‘s Elvis, Lin-Manuel Miranda’s In the Heights, The Matrix 4, The Many Saints of Newark, The Suicide Squad, Sherlock Homes 3, Godzilla vs. Kong and Judas and the Black Messiah will debut on HBO Max and in theaters on the same date.

This is devastating news for exhibitors, of course, but welcome to the new, pandemic-ordered world and the dynamic onrush of streaming services, etc. HE will always choose theatres, if and when they ever open again.

Just over 100 reputable critics have submitted their Best of 2020 lists to World of Reel‘s Jordan Ruimy. The topper, no surprise, is Chloe Zhao‘s Nomadland with 49 votes. Here’s the list along with some HE comments. My own personal preferences are after the jump:

1) Nomadland (49 votes) / HE: Yowsah.
2) First Cow (41) / HE: Good film but not this good…c’mon.
3) Never Rarely Sometimes Always (40) / HE: Somber, touching film about tural teens getting a NYC abortion, but doesn’t hold a candle to Four Months, Three Weeks, Two Days.
4) Da 5 Bloods (35) / HE: Deserving of respect but all that ’60s montage stuff was just thrown in to augment a so-so essence.
5) Minari (34) / HE: Good, earnest film.
6) I’m Thinking About Ending Things (32) / HE: Creepy but fascinating. Grows on you. The Oklahoma! stage performance sections + Agnes DeMille choreography.
7) Lovers Rock (29) / HE: Still haven’t seen it.
8) The Invisible Man (26) / / HE: Ranked higher than Tenet? Ludicrous.
9) Trial of the Chicago 7 (25) / HE: Yup.
10) Mank (21) / HE: Deserves higher placement.

11) Bacurau (21) / HE: Brazilian social-clash Peckinpah-Jodorowsky…hated it.
12) David Byrne’s American Utopia (21) / HE: Haven’t seen it.
13) Palm Springs (20) / HE: No way. Ridiculous. Mostly hated it. Sundancey.
14) Tenet (19) / HE: Should be among the top ten.
15) Dick Johnson Is Dead (19) / HE: Still haven’t seen it.
16) Bad Education (18) / HE: Agreed…a sharply observed docudrama.
17) Time (17)
18) The Assistant (17) / HE: Nope.
19) Vitalina Varela (16)
20) Pixar’s Soul (15) / HE: Bothersome, underwhelming, doesn’t make sense.

Everyone understands that dual pronoun use is currently in fashion among certain non-binary persons to express the complexities of their gender identity in different contexts and social settings…right?

I just want to apologize in advance to the gender-fluid, vague-pronoun crowd that I am, always have been and always will be a “he”, as in dude, guy, male-ish, rumblehog rider, baseball mitt owner, etc.

Although I’ve identified as metrosexual for years and have long abhorred certain aspects of macho posturing, I will never be a “he/she/whatever” and I’m definitely not a “they.”

I can’t be a “they” because I’m just, you know, a single person with a single past. Am I missing something? Do I need to shoot myself with a Sig Sauer? Or should I split my head open with a sharp axe?

My name is Jeff, I live in West Hollywood, and I only use “he/him” pronouns. I know that’s kind of an uncool or anti-social thing these days, but I’m obstinate, I guess.

Speaker #1: “Hey, where’d they go?” Speaker #2: “Who?” Speaker #1: “They were just here a few minutes ago.” Speaker #2: “Jeff was just here. He’s down at Kinkos picking up an order.” Speaker #1: “They’re at Kinkos?” Speaker #2: “No, he is…Jeff is.” Speaker #1: “I’m just trying to use cautious terminology. You don’t have to be disrespectful about it.” Speaker #2: “Who’s being disrespectful? I’m just saying plain and straight like Walter Brennan on horseback might say in a John Ford western, ‘He’s down at Kinkos’…period.”

The daughter of an occasional friend (i.e., one who sometimes ignores me but not always) recently insisted upon dual pronouns when they spoke about a female friend she was planning to meet in another city. “And so we had to navigate these awkward conversations,” the friend reports. “’How are they?’ ‘Oh, they’re fine.’ ‘I’m going to be seeing them later.’ If I were to point out how utterly bizarre this is [my daughter] would get angry.”

“What it actually satisfies is a need to be something other than Cis,” she interpreted. Cis is bad — cis is asshole males, must to avoid. Plus, she said, “It’s a way of getting attention from peers. Simplistic, yes. A few writers believe it is a kind of contagious hysteria, like anorexia.”

Actual friendo reply: “I still don’t get how an individual person can be a ‘they.’ Doesn’t that, like, break the basic rules of grammar? I mean, I don’t even get what it means.

“I know they mean well and I know this is what people want to hear about and I know it’s meant to be progress, but I just feel exhausted. She/Her/Hers. Does it have to be both Her and Hers? Aren’t they the same thing?”

Let Them All Talk (HBO Max, 12.10) is a smart, reasonably engrossing, better-than-mezzo-mezzo character study that largely takes place aboard the Queen Mary 2 during an Atlantic crossing.

It’s primarily about Alice, a moderately famous, sternly self-regarding novelist (Meryl Streep) and her somewhat brittle relationship with two old college friends, Susan and Roberta (Dianne Wiest, Candice Bergen), whom she’s invited along on a New York-to-Southhampton voyage, courtesy of her publisher.

Also tagging along are Tyler (Lucas Hedges), Alice’s 20something nephew, and Karen (Gemma Chan), an anxious book editor whom Tyler takes an unfortunate shine to.

Also aboard is a David Baldacci-like airport novelist (Dan Algrant) whose books Roberta and Susan adore, and who’s far more engaging and emotionally secure than Alice any day of the week.

Working from a script by Deborah Eisenberg and literally shot during a seven-day crossing in 2019, Let Them All Talk features Soderbergh in standard three-hat mode — director, cinematographer (as Peter Andrews) and editor. All I can say without spoiling is that he manages to keep things sharp, interesting and slicey-dicey for the most part. Streep is playing an aloof, mostly unlikable character, Hedges a somewhat gullible one, and Algrant the most amiable.

But Bergen’s Roberta, who’s fallen upon difficult economic times due to a divorce, is the most interesting character by far. It affords Bergen an opportunity to give her best performance in I don’t know how many years. Since Gandhi or even Carnal Knowledge?

Roberta is a frustrated boomer-aged woman who works in lingerie retail and who wants more money in her life. Alas, she hasn’t any economic opportunities to speak of and hasn’t a prayer of landing a rich boyfriend or husband because she’s “old meat” (all the eligible 60something guys, it seems, have 20something girlfriends) and far from svelte. And yet she’s on her game at all times, attuned and thinking and assessing. Plus she has a testy, unresolved relationship with Alice, who years ago used Rebecca’s ruptured marriage as raw material for her biggest-selling book, “You Always/You Never.”

And then her big opportunity comes when something happens that I can’t disclose, and Roberta…let’s just say her life takes a potential turn for the better.

I’m presuming that Let Them All Talk is regarded as a theatrical feature that had to accept an HBO Max debut because of the pandemic, and therefore Oscar-qualifying. If so, Bergen is definitely a Best Supporting Actress nominee waiting to happen. I just wish she’d somehow held onto her Murphy Brown-ish appearance. I only know that when she turned up in Warren Beatty‘s Rules Don’t Apply, my first reaction was “wait…who’s that? I know her but I can’t place her.”

I really liked Algrant’s novelist. A very sharp, no bullshit, calmly transactional character. Savvy, frank, classy. Somewhat resentful, Alice looks down her nose at him but he’s a pro with a good gig and no pretensions.

Question: If a book isn’t working out, what kind of writer would wipe it off his/her hard drive and throw away a printed manuscript? Writers don’t do that. They hold onto the material and use it for something else down the road. Sometimes you can find a new way in…nobody throws half-written books away.

Chan has a good scene in which she tells the story of her long engagement suddenly falling apart. And another when Tyler (Hedges) places his emotional cards face up on the table.

Honestly: How could this highly intelligent 20something even fantasize that Chan would be interested in him romantically? He’s supposed to be, what, 24 or 25? And he thinks that a 30something editor whose job is on the line, who’s trying to keep tabs on Alice…he thinks that this woman might be interested in a little trans-Atlantic boning?