Here’s the link, man…
Month: October 2023
Slow-Mo Kiss Lasts Too Long
But it’s nice to wade into the good old days when Nicholas Wending Refn had a good grip on things (i.e., before he went crazy or, you know, became excessive), and way before Ryan Gosling had submitted to the Barbie vaccine. Gosling was around 30 at the time; Carey Mulligan was 25 or thereabouts.
Who’s The Late 40ish Blonde?
I knew right away, of course — it’s Heather Graham, who turned 53 eight months ago (i.e., 9.29.23). Alabaster complexion, white-ish blonde hair, zero makeup, aging gracefully.
What’s in the envelope? The deed to the vineyard?
Guys Like Luke Hearfield Are Bad for Cinema Culture…Seriously
HE totally approves of The Worst Person in the World, but that’s all.
Lawless Norweigans
Contrary to Brian Krassenstein’s 9.30 tweet, the chain store is called P.C. Richard and Son.
The branch that got ripped off a couple of days ago in North Philadelphia is located at 2420 Cottman Avenue, Philadelphia, PA 19149.
BREAKING: The Philadelphia PD has just released this footage from a store in Northeast Philly called Richard & Son.
These actions can NEVER be justified, and I think it's fair to say that the vast, vast majority of Americans agree that this type of behavior should be dealt… pic.twitter.com/F1IzK7pgXS
— Brian Krassenstein (@krassenstein) September 30, 2023
Don’t Swallow “Saltburn” Hype!
Posted on 9.1.23: “I’ve just come out of Emerald Fennell‘s Saltburn, and it’s all about diseased psychologies and relentlessly dislikable people except for the delectably good-looking Jacob Elordi.
“It reeks of class hatred, oddness, perversity, arch upper-crust attitudes, callousness and class resentment, the slurping of dirty bath water, a nude Greek satyr finale featuring a fairly sizable schlongola, ‘wrong time of the month’ fingering + cunnilingus, high-impact visual punctuation for the sake of high-impact visual punctuation.
“Or, if you will, bold style amounting to absolutely nothing except bold style.
“Yeah, it’s The Talented Mr. Ripley, all right — Barry Keoghan, owner of the most famous and obtrusive bee-stung nose I’ve ever been forced to contemplate in film after film, is Matt Damon, and the incredibly beautiful Jacob Elordi is Jude Law, and Keoghan-the-interloper is one slinky, clumsy, weird-ass sociopath who hates himself, his parents, rich people, all people….he loves only Elordi except he’s not gay as much as (quoting Alison Oliver‘s Venetia character) a moth…a moth attracted to a glittery, super-wealthy flame.
“Saltburn is deeply divisive [among Telluriders], inspiring intense like-hate reactions…fans so far include Matt Neglia, Erik Anderson, Clayton Davis, Greg Ellwood. Haters include myself, David Ehrlich, Peter Debruge, David Rooney.
“I despised it so much that I took a 10-minute lobby break around the 70-minute mark.
“TheWrap‘s Tomris Laffly: ‘Saltburn works as a distinct and wildly entertaining probe into familiar waters of privilege, rather than the definite word on it.” Except it’s not a ‘distinct and wildly entertaining’ anything unless you have some kind of incurable aesthetic cancer festering inside you.”
“Like He’s Playin’ The Violin or Somethin'”
There’s a trilogy of intensely charismatic, cameo-level, award-worthy performances — intense burn-throughs that rang the proverbial bell in 20 or 16 or even five minutes and 40 seconds. And they all happened during the second half of the 20th Century.
The longest of these was the least heralded — Jackie Gleason‘s Minnesota Fats in The Hustler (’61). His performance occupied only 20 minutes of screen time, but Gleason was nominated for Best Supporting Actor (along with costar George C. Scott).
In The Silence of the Lambs (’90) Anthony Hopkins‘ Hannibal Lecter had only 16 minutes of screen time, but it was sufficient to snag a Best Actor Oscar.
The shortest was Beatrice Straight‘s barn burner of a cameo in Network, technically just under six minutes but actually closer to four and three-quarters — that’s how long that marital argument scene she had with William Holden lasted. It won her a Best Supporting Actress Oscar, of course.
What 21st Century quickies qualify? Have there been any? I’m asking.
Wait, one more: Christopher Plummer‘s Mike Wallace in The Insider (’99), which — I’m just guessing — isn’t much longer than 25 minutes. Okay, possibly 30.