Because Brad Silberling (Lemony Snicket’s A Series of Unfortunate Events, Casper) is directing, the odds are that Land of the Lost (Universal, 7.17.09), an animated adventure and his latest big-time venture, will turn out decently. But the Lost swag that arrived today was a bust. If you’re going to send out swag, send the kind that impresses and not the kind that makes guys like me write little diss pieces like this.

Leaning against my front door was a decent-sized cardboard box containing another cardboard foldout display deal covered in movie art, and inside the box was….a brown T-shirt. With the word “Sleestak” on the chest and a picture of a monkey with saucer-sized Invaders from Mars mutant eyes. Plus a Land of the Lost theme song playing on a dinky little music player that wouldn’t work until you popped in the double A batteries.