Given that Chris Tucker has made a total of three movies over the last nine years, and all of them for Brett RatnerRush Hour (’98), Rush Hour 2 (’01) and Rush Hour 3 (opening 8.10) — it’s not likely I’ll be seeing him in another film anytime soon. Actually, I know I won’t. I’ve decided as much, and for a very compelling, deep-down reason.

Chris Tucker, Jackie Chan in Rush Hour 3

Almost every line Tucker said during last night’s Rush Hour 3 screening made me wince. The way he delivered them, I mean. To me, Tucker’s high-pitched, kazoo- like Daffy Duck voice is chalk on a blackboard, especially with that jackhammer street-rap delivery that he can’t seem to let go of. And after a half hour or so of watching and listening I decided I will never again watch this guy jump around and go “c’mon, maayeeen!…litten to me!….bap-dee-dee-bap-bap…yayeh! yayeh!” It’s over, finito…purged.
Tucker has many fans and that’s cool. He’s got the wit, the smirk attitude and the showbiz swagger of a first-rate, live-wire comedian. More power to him, but I’m done with his mincing, squealy-ass voice for the rest of my natural life. Unless he turns up in a film for, you know, Bernardo Bertolucci or Paul Thomas Ander- son or Florian von Henckel Donnersmarck…a director who’ll sit him down and say, “Chris, you’re great and all but you have to give the hyper thing a rest and let your voice settle into a deeper, quieter place.” But how likely is that?