“If an actor gets so much plastic surgery that they’re not quite the same person, they have to change their name so it’s not quite the same name. Example: ‘Did you see Lindsey Lowland on SNL last night?’ ‘No, I was watching an Arthur Schwarzegger movie.’ ‘Which one was that?’ ‘You know, that one with Dickie Rourke and Sylvester Scallion.'” — Rule #1 from Bill Maher’s New Rules for Hollywood (posted today on the Hollywood Reporter website at 4:45 pm).