“With the exception of Black Panther, which likely has no shot, Green Book is the only Best Picture nominee with an unequivocally happy ending, which probably accounts for a lot.

“Every other Best Picture nominee ending is ‘yes, but…[SPOILERS]

Roma — The family is safe but you, Cleo, are forever doomed to be a maid that fancier humans will fly over in jet planes without even noticing.

Bohemian Rhapsody — You rocked it with the show of your life. Unfortunately, you’re on an HIV poz downward death spiral.

A Star Is Born — You’re rich and famous! Sorry your alky, pant-peeing husband just killed himself.

BlacKkKlansman — Racist plot foiled! Too bad they’ll just be more.

Vice — Evil won because voters are dumb, as the ’00, ’04 and ’16 election confirmed.

The Favourite — Congrats on being more devious than your rival! Enjoy life with a disgusting, insane person who has absolute power over you.” — posted on Facebook by Luke Y. Thompson.