The only thing that can lift my Oscar spirits is something that can’t possibly happen — a suprise Demian Bichir win for Best Actor. That is the only thing that could possibly turn me on (other that Billy Crystal‘s patter) during the 2.26 telecast. This is going to be one of the dullest and least surprising Oscar shows in history.

It seem as if the Viola Davis-and-Octavia Spencer coronation has already happened, for the most part. I’d feel differently if Brad Pitt or George Clooney had a real shot at Best Actor, or if Moneyball‘s Bennett Miller had been nominated for Best Director (110% deserved) or if Mychael Danna‘s Moneyball score had been nominated. But I’ve got nothing to invest in here.

A couple of more years like this and the Oscars will be in real trouble.