…to any President (JFK), Presidential candidate (RFK, Jr.) or First lady (Michelle Obama) who advocates for physical fitness. Or, you know, is swole or posts Twittervid swolefies.

JFK couldn’t do shirtless pushups because of his back issues, but now we’ve got a declared Presidential candidate with a bod like Mark Wahlberg‘s. Perhaps this is unimportant in the greater scheme, but it’s definitely poking at our boredom.

Yes, the shirtless swole brand reminds everyone of Vladimir Putin on horseback, but at least this opens the door to a possible RFK-Putin UFC cage match in ’25 (presuming Putin will still be in power two years hence), which goes hand in hand with the forthcoming Elon Musk-Mark Zuckerberg barefoot battle of the titans.

Some say that in the wake of Occasionally Wobbly Joe (who, to be fair, has kept himself trim with regular workouts) it’ll be amazing to have a swole President. RFK, Jr. would set a great example as average Americans have never been flabbier or more overweight**…dear, God, please forgive me for using the “o” word!

Susie (@SoCalSuister) on Twitter: “My eleven year old son just asked me why I was watching a video of a guy doing push-ups…’do you like him or something?’”

** When I was nine or ten I was friendly with a local Irish kid named Brendan. He was a tiny bit bulky but nowhere near the levels of flat-out obesity that is rampant among so many kids these days. Even so I clearly recall poor Brendan being razzed as “the fatter batter” during stickball games.

June 26, 2023by Jeff Wells22 Comments