The dull horror of a $200 million dollar 3D sequel (Sony, 5.25) using a 1969 time travel plot. Rote cartoon CG in the service of cheap, lowest-common-denominator laughs. The creative imaginings of Will Smith, director Barry Sonnenfeld and producer Walter Parkes funnelled through screenwriter Etan Cohen and two or three others. Kim Masters3.9.11 production story. And the likelihood of great financial success.

Consolation: All-media screenings will happen in mid-to-late May, at which point I’ll be in France and far, far away from the MIB effect in all senses of the term.