The Playlist is offering six or seven reasons why Watchmen fails in a post-Dark Knight landscape. Reading the article top to bottom makes the points more clearly than the reading of the headlines, but here goes. One, nothing seems to be truly st stake. Two, the tone is goofy. Three, faithful fidelity to the graphic novel was a bad idea. Four, the ’80s are cornball. Five, dark and cartoony doesn’t make it. Six, emotion, truth and grittiness are sold separately. And seven, the music blows.