As I am in no way, shape or form a fantasy geek, I don’t give one infinitesimal fuck about the origins of J.R.R. Tolkien, or the story of how he came to imagine and then write about The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings and the other one. I’m really and truly sorry, in fact, that I’ve had to contend with Peter Jackson‘s adaptations of these epic tales. The hours I’ve spent watching these films are occasions for deep regret. I’ll never get those hours back. I hope this movie dies.