“We used to wake up, read the paper, see all the terrible things in the world and say ‘at least my life is better than those poor slobs.’ But now it’s the opposite. Social media tells you everyone is having more fun — with more toys and more friends — than you. They’re always in St. Kitts having Mai Tais at sunset, while you’re in Canoga Park selling your plasma at dusk. Before Instagram, you could be a loser but not feel it. Because the winners weren’t always in your face. Even the most mundane posts, of avocado toast in a hipster coffee shop, sends the message ‘I’m having fun and you’re not…enjoy your cup of noodles, fatty.’

Wokesters despise Maher. Especially Millennials. They’d love to cancel him. They’re panting for it.

“This is how the internet gets you coming and going. Guys watch the haves on Instagram, and then go over to sites like 8chan to brood with the have-nots. Being a loser used to mean you stayed home on Friday nights to get a head start on your Star Wars fan fiction. And you had no social skills. But it wasn’t a movement. 8chan is where three of the mass shooters posted their manifestos. It’s where QAnon got started. 8chan is to lonely white men what the hometown buffet is to gastric bypass patients.

“And it’s why people need real friends — not chat-room friends, not Facebook friends, not fellow paranoids feeding each other misinformation on a screen, but real human friends who can look you in the eye and tell you that your theories about the coming race war are horseshit. And to tell you that social media isn’t real. So stop comparing yourself to a fantasy. No one is having that much fun. They’re just distorting reality to bid themselves up. Trust me, anyone out there who’s home tonight and feeling left out, discarded and disrespected — if you knew how much everyone else is fakin’ it, you wouldn’t want to joint them anyway.”