I never eat Kentucky Fried Chicken anyway so I don’t feel all that culpable. Nonetheless, what this video shows is vile and loathsome. Will the underclass fat-asses who gorge on KFC several times a week pay the slightest attention or experience even a moment’s hesitation as they order up that next barrel? I agree with and admire the otherwise comical Pamela Anderson for trying to do something about it. Her suggestion that eating too much meat will result in poor sexual performance is, I feel, a fairly clever argument.

“Of course, the best thing that you can do to help animals is to stop eating them, so please consider trying a vegetarian diet — just like me,” she says. “And if you don’t think animal cruelty is a strong enough argument for vegetarianism you might want to at least read up on how eating meat causes impotence and slows the flow of blood to all the organs, not just to the heart, if you catch my drift.”