Yesterday the Trumpies announced federal measures “aimed at protecting religious freedom and reducing discrimination against people and groups of faith”…bullshit. Trump just wants to stem any possible thinning of support among evangelicals in the wake of Christianity Today‘s Mark Galli recently calling for Trump’s removal from office and urging rightwing religious nutters not to support him.

In line with the protection con, Trump has claimed that “there’s a growing totalitarian impulse on the far left that seeks to punish, restrict and even prohibit religious expression.” Wrong — there’s a growing conviction among mainstream lefties that evangelicals’ support of The Beast is beyond despicable. In light of this and in honor of Woody Allen, HE reiterates that if Jesus were to return to earth and see what is going on in his name, he would never stop throwing up.