I’ve been advised that I need to surgically remove the crab-head tone of certain Hollywood Elsewhere posts and to forsake the idea of assessing the deep-down reality of things as I understand them, and instead adopt a glowing positive outlook.

“Don’t say this or that aspect of a film doesn’t cut it,” I’ve been told. “Talk only about what’s good and what’s glorious…focus on the award-worthy, admirable, soothing, stirring, uplifting. Celebrate, don’t denigrate. Refuse to acknowledge mediocrity. Accentuate the positive. Re-tool Hollywood Elsewhere into the ultimate ‘safe space.’”

Okay, but if I do this I’ll probably have to rename the site…right? Because my head will no longer be “elsewhere”, so to speak, but concentrating on alpha stuff. Remember that 1930s song “I Want To Be Happy”? A tinny recording of that tune could activate each and every time you visit the site. I’m getting chills just thinking about it.

What does everyone think about re-christening the site as Hollywood Lobotomy?