An hour ago I felt a spark of humor in a familiar notion — i.e., derogatory nicknames of failed movies and Broadway shows. And then it died.

I’ve never been much for laughing out loud (I’m basically an LQTM-er) so it means something when I blurt out a chuckle while experiencing a mild chest spasm, and that’s what happened at 6:10 am when I was reading a Wiki bio of lyricist Alan Jay Lerner (My Fair Lady, Brigadoon, Camelot). In May ‘83 a Lerner-directed B’way musical (co-created with Charles Strouse) called Dance A Little Closer opened and closed the same night. Wags called it Close A Little Faster.

I was immediately reminded of a John Travolta-Scarlet Johansson relationship film called A Love Song for Bobby Long (Lionsgate, 1.21.05). Directed by Shainee Gabel and set in New Orleans, the 120-minute film, which tanked after earning a 43% RT rating, was dubbed Bobby Way Too Long.

Now I can’t think of any others. C’mon! I did a Google search…zip. I know they’re out there. Please.

One more Alan Jay Lerner-ism. The famed lyricist and librettist was married eight times. Quote from one of Lerner’s ex-wives: “Marriage is Alan’s way of saying goodbye.” That’s funny! I’m sorry but it is.