Unfair as this sounds in the immediate wake of Kamala Harris‘s electoral tragedy, which marks the eighth anniversary of Hillary Clinton’s striking loss to The Very Same Beast, I’m presuming the Dems will not be especially keen on another female standard-bearer. Not in ’28, at least.

They need to nominate Gavin Elster, the San Francisco shipping tycoon…sorry, Gavin Newsom. You know he’ll be able to skillfully debate J.D. Vance, who will almost certainly be the 2028 Republican nominee. Face it — too many voters in thiw country are misogynist ayeholes. Plus Gavin is 6’3″. Plus he has three years to erase his overly-friendly-to-bums-and-thieves image.