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Hollywood Elsewhere - Movie news and opinions by Jeffrey Wells

“There’s Hollywood Elsewhere and then there’s everything else. It’s your neighborhood dive where you get the ugly truth, a good laugh and a damn good scotch.”
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(Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Super 8)

“Smart, reliable and way ahead of the curve … a must and invaluable read.”
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(Down and Dirty Pictures Easy Riders, Raging Bulls)

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“Jeffrey Wells isn’t kidding around. Well, he does kid around, but mostly he just loves movies.”
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“In a world of insincere blurbs and fluff pieces, Jeff has a truly personal voice and tells it like it is. Exactly like it is, like it or not.”
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Director (The Punisher), Writer (Armageddon, The Rock)

“So when I said I’d like to leave my cowboy hat there, I was obviously saying (in my head at least) that I’d be back to stay the following year … simple and quite clear all around.”
–Jeffrey Wells, HE, January ’09

“If you’re in a movie that doesn’t work, game over and adios muchachos — no amount of star-charisma can save it.”
–Jeffrey Wells, HE

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64 Comments
Bring The Ugly

Make no mistake — President Trump is just as responsible for last weekend’s synagogue massacre in Pittsburgh as if he pulled the trigger himself. He might have similarly licked the stamps for Cesar Sayoc as he prepared his manila MAGAbomb envelopes for the post office. Six days ago Trump more or less goaded Gregory Bush to try and shoot up a predominantly black Louisville church — when Bush couldn’t get in he shot and killed two African Americans at a supermarket.

There’s simply no way to credibly deny that Trump isn’t the orchestrator, ringleader and rank spiritual father of all this hate and horror. And I guess given this state of affairs, I’m a little disappointed that only a thousand people gathered this afternoon near the Tree of Life synagogue as Donald, Melania, Ivanka and Jared visited the synagogue to pay their respects and blah blah. Seems like an insufficient response to an obviously odious political charade.

(More…)
October 30, 2018 4:17 pmby Jeffrey Wells
39 Comments
Plain-Spoken vs. Polite

Tweeted this morning by David Ehrlich: “I wish N.Y. Mag had stuck with their original headline for this story.”

October 30, 2018 11:24 amby Jeffrey Wells
48 Comments
Banshee Shriek at Midnight

Don’t even joke about this, Jesus wept, etc.

October 30, 2018 10:02 amby Jeffrey Wells

8 Comments
Higher-Grade Irwin Allen Distraction

From the disciplined if opportunistic Norweigan producers who made The Wave, but this time without director Roar Uthaug.

October 30, 2018 9:47 amby Jeffrey Wells
24 Comments
Hollywood Halloween

Below is a shot of Indiewire film honcho Eric Kohn (black suit, shades) and a group of Halloween revelers in standard Kubrick-tribute garb (The Shining, Eyes Wide Shut, Full Metal Jacket, etc.). I’m more into jack-o-lantern minimalism — for the last couple of years I’ve worn a simple leather face mask that I bought in Venice, Italy.

But if I wanted to wear a serious Kubrick-inspired outfit and if I had the time and the extra scratch, I would waltz around Savannah as either (a) Peter Sellers‘ President Merkin Muffley in Dr. Strangelove (bald head cap, glasses, gray suit and tie with three-pointed handkerchief), (b) Sellers’ Dr. Strangelove himself (wheelchair, glasses, light brown upswept hair, shiny black glove on right hand) or (c) Kirk Douglas‘ Colonel Dax in Paths of Glory (French officer military outfits, steel helmet, knee-high boots, metal whistle around neck).


Kohn and the gang.

Peter Sellers as Dr. Strangelove
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October 30, 2018 9:20 amby Jeffrey Wells
16 Comments
Candidate Who Drives Himself Around…Yes!

On the way back to Wichita Falls! Looking forward to seeing everyone at Kiwanis Prairie Dog Park. Join us at 6:15. pic.twitter.com/fFyqaWT2xz

— Beto O'Rourke (@BetoORourke) October 29, 2018

October 30, 2018 8:42 amby Jeffrey Wells

6 Comments
Full Submission, Same Deal

Last night I saw all of Karyn Kusama‘s Destroyer (Annapurna, 12.25) — the whole 123-minute package. And I felt just as dismayed and under-nourished as I did after catching the first 90 minutes worth in Telluride (“Pains of Hell,” 9.1.18).

I was kicked, beaten up, spat upon and slapped around for walking out before my Telluride screening ended, but my assessment this morning is exactly the same. It’s still a nihilistic, dispiriting renegade-cop noir that is mainly about how Nicole Kidman‘s burnt-out-zombie makeup.

It’s stylistically impressive — Kusama does well by the rules and expectations of the urban cop genre — but pretentious and labored, and at least 20 minutes too long.

Kidman plays Erin Bell, a wasted, walking-dead Los Angeles detective trying to settle some bad business and save her daughter from a life of crime and misery. And I’m sorry but the verdict is the same — she gives a fully-invested performance but at least 75% of Kidman’s dialogue disappears into the ether because she whispers it in a kind of raspy, breathy, throat-cancer tone of voice.

Every so often I would hear a word or make out a phrase, but the only way I’m going to fully understand what Bell was saying is when I watch Destroyer with subtitles. And no, it’s not my hearing. It’s Kusama telling Kidman “go ahead, do the raspy, whispery thing…I like it.”

Okay, the ending is reasonably satisfying — it ties the story together by linking back to the opening scene. I said to myself “okay, not bad…a decent way to wrap things up.”

Last night’s Savannah Film Festival screening happened at the SCAD Trustees theatre on Broughton. I left with a sense of completion and satisfaction. For I am perceptive enough to recognize a problematic film without seeing it all the way to the end. The 90 minutes that I experienced in Telluride were not and are not substantially different than the full-boat version that I saw last night.

(More…)
October 30, 2018 8:24 amby Jeffrey Wells
41 Comments
Asinine Rogen-Cronkite Casting Goes South

On 10.26 Collider‘s Jeff Sneider tweeted that “Seth Rogen is no longer playing Walter Cronkite” in David Gordon Green‘s Newsflash, a drama about the reporting of JFK’s assassination on 11.22.63. The project, based on a script by Ben Jacoby, was first announced around 10 months ago.

Question to God as well as HE readership: Has there ever been a dumber, more completely idiotic casting decision than the idea of Seth Rogen being the right guy to play Walter effing Cronkite? Rogen doesn’t look or sound remotely like the Real McCoy, doesn’t have the voice, and could never deliver the stodgy newsroom attitude and the diligent, old-school-commentator vibe…forget it. Plus he’s at least ten years too young.

Had it happened, this would be have been the worst casting since Leonardo DiCaprio was chosen by Clint Eastwood to play J. Edgar Hoover.

What are some of the other whoppingly absurd casting calls of the 21st Century? Include the 20th if you want.

Incidentally: If someone has a PDF of Jacoby’s script, please send it along.

October 30, 2018 7:34 amby Jeffrey Wells
14 Comments
20 Years Ago Today (Sort Of)

Eight months ago I mentioned that my 20-year anniversary as an online columnist was approaching, and then I forgot to mention it when the day occured (roughly 10.10.18). So I’m celebrating today with a bike ride in Forsyth Park — no champagne, 20 days late. Those who believe in the HE narrative (or, if you will, the yellow-sneaker HE fairy) could, if they’re so inclined, join the throng by signing up for HE-plus. A birthday-cake cheer as I blow out the candles. Purely optional.

It’s understood that I get stuff wrong all the time. Sometimes I make factual errors, overstate things, resort to inelegant phrasing, etc. But I always correct these boners within hours so all is forgiven. What should I do to increase the chances that I’ll be in business for the next 20 years? And don’t give me that “online columnists will be extinct in 20 years” bullshit. Or that I’ll be too withered or scattered to bang out interesting riffs. Be constructive. 11:25 am update: No responses — cool. Then I’m pretty much doing it right. Thanks!

[Click through to full story on HE-plus]

October 30, 2018 6:58 amby Jeffrey Wells

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