No Brainwashing Required

Following last night’s Berlinale screening of Sophie Hyde‘s Good Luck To You, Leo Grande, Emma Thompson, who plays Nancy, a 62 year-old woman (like Thompson) who hires a sex worker (Daryl McCormack) to get her ya-ya’s out, discussed performing a full-frontal nude scene.

“It was hard“, Thompson said during a Berlinale press conference. “This is homework for all of you. We’re only used to seeing bodies that have, you know, been trained…I knew that Nancy wouldn’t go to the gym. She would have a normal body of a 62-year-old woman who’s had two children.

“I can’t stand in front of a mirror like that. If I stand in front of a mirror, I’ll always pull something in [or do] something. I can’t just stand there. Why would I do that? It’s horrifying. But that’s the problem, isn’t it?

“Women have been brainwashed all our lives. That’s the fact of it. And everything that surrounds us reminds us how imperfect we are and how everything is wrong. Everything is wrong, and we need to look like this.”

“So you try. You try standing in front of the mirror and don’t move. Don’t move. Just accept it — just accept it, and don’t judge it. That’s the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I’ve done something I’ve never done as an actor.”

HE to Thompson #1: You’re contradicting yourself here. On one hand you’re saying that staring at your buck-naked 62 year-old bod is “horrifying,” but the reason is because of the “brainwashing” that we’ve all been subjected to by advertising, movies and TV shows. I don’t happen to believe that my own bod is horrifying or even distressing, but I can imagine being less than pleased with my physical self 10 or 20 years hence, especially if I stop going to the gym. Most of us understand that bodies which have gone to seed are dismaying all on their own — no “brainwashing” is needed to complete the lamentable fact.

HE to Thompson #2: Nobody who’s seen better naked days ever stands in front of a mirror and just stares…nobody. I didn’t do this even when I was in my absolute prime (i.e., late teens, 20s, 30s). I gave myself a quick glance or two but I never stared…not once. So why the hell would a 62 year-old do this, and why the hell would a director of a movie want an audience to contemplate an older, saggier bod? To what end? Who needs it? Answer: No one.

The trim and tanned Cary Grant was 62 when he made his final film, Walk, Don’t Run (’66). He was one of the best-looking, most-in-shape older males on the planet at that time, and there’s no way he would’ve shot a scene in which he stands in front of a mirror and studies his 62-year-old bod, even if he was wearing swim trunks or gym shorts. No way. Because (again) people never do this, and an audience would rather watch the 50ish Grant with his shirt off in North by Northwest or To Catch A Thief, because he looked better then.

My point, I suppose, is that Sophie Hyde…well, who knows what she was thinking? But if you ask me shooting an MCU of a full-frontal, present-tense Thompson was an act of sadism. To me anyway. Or exploitation. Or even cruelty.

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“Jeremy, You’ve Been Traded to the Phillies”

It was sad to hear of the gunshot suicide of pro baseball player Jeremy Giambi. Not because I’m a huge baseball fan or had followed Giambi’s career all along, but because I vividly recall Nick Porrazzo‘s performance as Giambi in Bennett Miller‘s Moneyball (’11). It’s fair to say that Giambi’s career peaked when he was with the Oakland A’s from 2000 through ’02.

Giambi died at his parents’ home in Claremont last Wednesday (2.9). He was only 47. I’m very sorry.

Whoa, Step Back…It’s Mr. Hot Shot!

Among others, THR‘s Scott Feinberg and Variety‘s Marc Malkin have reported about last night’s “surprise appearance” of Kanye West at a preview screening of the biographical Netflix docuseries Jeen-Yuhs.

Directed by Coodie & Chike, the Kanye doc is divided into three chapters. Chapter one, “Vision”, will premiere on Netflix on 2.16.22 chapters two and three will be released soon after.

A friend says Jeen-Yuhs is “impressive…sort of like Hoop Dreams in chronicling Kanye’s journey over the years, how he came to be the way he is.” In other words, an ass-kisser.

I wonder to what extent the doc will get into Kanye’s erratic behavior during the Kim breakup, his friendship with Donald Trump, the reasoning behind his run for the Presidency in ’20, etc.

HE to friendo after watching clip of Kanye’s post-screening remarks: “Who cares what this rich, overindulged jerk has to say about anything? Particularly regarding matters of God, spirit and the cosmic truth of it all?”

Question: Los Angeles is enjoying a heat wave. (Right now it’s 84 degrees.) And it was definitely on the warmish side last night. So why was Kanye wearing a big bulky, Alaskan-winter jacket with a hoodie? Does he have a deal with Balenciaga to wear their stuff in front of the cameras?

“The Fuck-It List”

I have to drive down to Compton again and am therefore unable to share expansive reactions to Michel Franco‘s Sundown, but it’s easily the most interesting (or do I mean fascinating?) film of 2022 so far.

It’s basically a drop-out movie like Michelangelo Antonioni‘s The Passenger (’75), but I wish it had less plot, which is to say less motivational explanation. I was wishing it would just devote itself to the idea of pissing off and nihilistically doing whatever the hell. But it’s not, and that, for me, is a slight problem.

It’s about Neil (Tim Roth), a wealthy co-heir to a pig-slaughtering business who’s vacationing in Acapulco with his sister Allison (Charlotte Gainsbourg) and her two teenage children.

Allison and the kids pack and leave when news comes that she and Neil’s mother has died. But Neil decides against going — he lies that his passport is missing, and returns to Acapulco, and then checks into a shitty little hotel. And that’s it, at least for a while. Neil drinks a lot of beer, finds a somewhat older girlfriend (Iazua Larios), hangs out and basically does jack shit.

From Anthony Lane’s New Yorker review: “Here, we realize, is that most scandalous of creatures: the human who wants nothing. I’ve seen enough films about people who rush to make the most of their mortal span, ticking off bucket lists and reaping rosebuds while they may, so it’s a relief to come across Neil, the lolling foe of the upbeat. The title of the movie doesn’t do him justice. It should be called ‘The Fuck-it List.'”

Kravitz’s Hair Almost Steals Show

Last night Hollywood Elsewhere watched Steven Soderbergh‘s Kimi (aka KIMI). My basic take is “minor Soderbergh but pretty good…a reasonably decent Rear Window meets The Conversation tribute film, set in Seatlle during the pandemic. (With a tiny spritz of The Parallax View.) Nicely shot, cut, acted, produced…better than decent.”

Directed by Sodie, shot by “Peter Andrews“, written and produced by David Koepp.

Every compelling protagonist in a thriller needs a handicap of some kind. In Rear Window James Stewart‘s handicap was that his leg was in a cast. In Vertigo his handicap was that he suffered from a fear of heights. Kravitz’s handicap is that she’s agoraphobic.

And boy, she sure lives in a nice loft! How can she afford a place like this? Her mom bought it for her? She’s just a WFH tech — can’t be earning enough to buy a loft this spacious and bucks-up.

75% to 80% of Kravitz’s performance is absorbed or dominated by her perfectly styled blue hair. Kimi‘s hair stylist needs to stand up and take a bow…enjoy your moment! We’re watching the movie and thinking “okay, snappy Soderbergh and some nice Rear Window action” but two-thirds of the time all you can think about is HER HAIR!…HER HAIR!…LOOK AT THAT EXQUISITE COIF AND DYE JOB!

Friendo: “Yes, it’s true — the hair dominates. But Kravitz gives a good minimalist performance. She creates an intriguingly brittle character. She’s very true to everything that we all loathe about Millennials (i.e., Kravitz is 33).”

“I agree that it’s minor Soderbergh, but it’s good minor Soderbergh.”

HE: I loved it when she suddenly becomes a kind of Charles Bronson figure at the very end. Obviously a Hollywood-style solution to her troubles, but I emotionally wanted this to happen.

The paranoid mindset of The Conversation and The Parallax View influenced everyone and everything back in the early to mid ’70s. Ever since that time the corporate world has been the source of all the bad guys. A corporate guy appears, you KNOW he’s up to no good. It’s an idea that’s dominated thrillers for a good half-century, and will continue to dominate for the foreseeable future. Because corporations have been running the real domestic realm since Gerald Ford-slash-Jimmy Carter, and certainly since Ronald Reagan.

Friendo #2: “It’s a woke thing, right? Sexual assault. Zoey discovers an incident of sexual assault and possible murder.”

HE: True — a woman being assaulted by a rich corporate pig.

Friendo #2: “Textbook woke. There are only two melodramatic themes today — sexual assault and racism. I guess we can add LGBTQ concerns.”

HE: Except Rita Wilson, Kravitz’s boss and allegedly a sister-in-arms, doesn’t help when Kravitz reports the possible murder.

Friendo #2: “Yeah, but it’s more woke fan fiction. They always make these unbelievable scenarios at a time when it would NEVER happen. Maybe ten years ago. Not now. They want to tell stories about the world that existed before it became what it is post-#MeToo, post-George Floyd, etc. The nonstop obsession with women as victims is so tired by now. They’re like girl people. Not adults. Still children.”

HE: It would be more interesting if they threw in an unusual crime. Like dog-napping a la Lady Gaga. Or an older gay guy murdering his partner over infidelity a la Prick Up Your Ears.

Friendo #2: “Anything other than this. Make the victim a dude. Plus who wants to watch people wearing masks in movies now? It’s nice to see faces. So Zoey is just paranoid?”

HE: Agoraphobic. Afraid of life outdoors.

Denial Is A River in England

On 12.21.21 a Death on the Nile trailer popped through, and it seemed immediately obvious that Kenneth Branagh‘s film was an all-CG shit show. The “S.S. Karnak” seemed completely digital. The cruiser in the 1978 version may have been “real”, but not this one. Branagh may have used some second-unit footage of ancient Egyptian statues and whatnot, but mainly it’s all fake, fake, FAKE.

Now comes a 2.11 Variety story from Jazz Tangcay, titled “Was Death on the Nile Really Filmed in Egypt?

Variety should have titled it “Filmed in England, Death on the Nile Is Total CG Bullshit (Except for Some Second-Unit Photography).” But the headline was too long, and it sounded kinder and friendlier to ask if Nile was actually filmed in Egypt, etc. Tangcay gently explains that “more than a little movie magic was involved” — i.e., the principal actors never even saw the Nile. Not on the production budget’s dime, I mean.

Mother Russia

Hollywood Elsewhere’s peaceful solitude is about to end with Tatiana returning from Russia tomorrow. Given her ardent admiration for Vladimir Putin and all things Russia, I am not looking forward to any discussions of the allegedly imminent invasion of Ukraine by the Russian military. If I was in Ukraine I would be torn between leaving the country and wanting to stick around in order to watch the bombings and the devastation, not to mention ducking the shrapnel as bullets whizz by my head.

Rogen: “At Best Oscars Are Whatevs”

In my book Seth Rogen‘s performance as Rand Gauthier is the best part of Pam & Tommy. That said and no offense, I still have a problem with the light orange and lavender tuxedo that he wore to last year’s Emmy Awards.

Posted earlier today by The Insider‘s Jason Guerrasio: “I don’t get why movie people care so much if other people care what awards we give ourselves,” Rogen told Insider during an interview with Paul Rudd about their Super Bowl commercial for Lay’s potato chips.

“To me, maybe people just don’t care. I don’t care who wins the automobile awards. No other industry expects everyone to care about what awards they shower upon themselves. Maybe people just don’t care. Maybe they did for a while and they stopped caring. And why should they?”

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Submit To Woke Narrative, or You’re In Serious Trouble

“Showtime is billing Sacha Jenkins’ new docuseries Everything’s Gonna Be All White as three parts, plus a bonus episode.

“This is an odd choice of focus. The three episodes are a solid if formally inconsistent attempt to tackle the racial history of America in discipline-spanning socio-economic-cultural terms. It makes some smart connections and is full of worthy insights, but I’d never recommend it over HBO’s similar Exterminate All the Brutes or a dozen PBS docuseries covering the same terrain.” — from Daniel Fienberg‘s 2.10 Hollywood Reporter review.

HE riff on The Stinky Whiteness, for the 17th or 18th time: Democrats have to stand for sensible, compassionate, fair-minded liberalism, etc. JFK-styled or LBJ-flavored or Obama-stamped liberalism means fair but practical policies that are even-steven across the board, or at least ones that try to be that.

I don’t believe or accept the idea that all whites are inherently demonic, and I don’t believe or accept that all African Americans are inherently saintly. Nor do I believe in woke Stalinism and moderate college professors losing their jobs because they’re not 100% sold on the equity thing.

I am essentially a sensible non-fanatic as far as racial matters are concerned. Or, if you will, I’m a white John McWhorter who believes in basic fairness and sensible progressive programs. I also believe that activist trans activists and the “what’s your pronoun?” people are fine and no worries but at the same time my eyes are rolling upwards.

To some out there what I’ve just written proves that I’m some kind of salivating racist homophobe. But I’m not. Really. I’m a center-left moderate who’d increasingly appalled by the Crazy Left. Right now I’m beyond furious that these nutters have already shit the bed and are going to bring about a rightwing landslide next fall.

Democrats have become the “African-Americans need to be given preferential treatment in all walks of life in order to correct racist mindsets of the past four centuries” party, or basically the Nikole Hannah Jones 1619 party. Because BIPOCS have been murdered and shat upon for centuries.

Democrats have also become the “children need to be instructed that whites are in the grip of an evil genetic tendency party”, and the time has come for whites to take a back seat in order for progress to manifest. Or words to that effect.

Democrats have also become the “more men need the freedom to become pregnant homemakers” party.

Put another way, the urban elite progressive wing has become the Rosanna Arquette party, and is ruled by the idea that whites must accept across-the-board corrections — they need to bow their heads and accept punishment for their ancestors’ behavior in order to allow for racial re-dress and racially corrective ideas and programs to take hold.