SBIFF Virtuosos Hoo-Hah Factor

SBIFF Virtuoso headliners, in alphabetical order: A Complete Unknown‘s Monica Barbaro, Emilia Perez‘s Selena Gomez, Wicked‘s Ariana Grande, Sing Sing‘s Clarence Maclin, Anora‘s Mikey Madison, September 5‘s John Magaro, I’m Still Here‘s Fernanda Torres, The Apprentice‘s Sebastian Stan.

I hereby apologize for expressing disappointment that A Real Pain‘s Kieran Culkin and Babygirl’s Harris Dickinson didn’t show up. I really wanted to sample Dickinson’s vibe, but another time. What was important was that SBIFF honcho Roger Durling managed to lasso eight seriously live-wire movie people — seven of them youngish and popping like well-oiled corn kernels over a flame, and the eighth (the attractively-seasoned Torres) was arguably the most ebullient of the lot.

The annual Virtuosos gathering is an elegant, time-honored showcase for this and that brand of talent and charisma, but it’s also a competitive event because when it’s over people always say “who won?” Well, nobody really knocked it out of the park but if you ask me the two standouts were Stan and Gomez.

Stan is currently shooting Fjord, a Romanian-language film for director Cristian Mungiu, and at one point moderator Dave Karger asked him to speak a little Romanian, and Stan passed with flying colors. Plus he amusingly dissected the coarseness and fraudulence of the Trump persona.

Gomez made a vivid impression because of her superior leg sculpture. Before last night I had never really thought of the Emilia Perez costar as a gal with great gams — now I can’t think of anything else.

Sidenote: Ariana Grande‘s Wicked performance as Glinda has landed a Best Supporting Actress nomination. In the film Grande’s wind-up-doll, pretty-in-pink mannerisms are offered as a satire of self-obsessed femininity, but last night….how do I say this tactfully?…she seemed to be playing Glinda as herself. (Or vice versa.) Grande is certainly not a “let it all hang out” fuck-all type. Her way of speaking, her body language…it’s all been carefully rehearsed.

Plus when Karger asked her to recommend a relatively unsung film for people to seek out and watch, Grande either (a) couldn’t come up with one or (b) chose not to for…I don’t know, possibly out of fear of sounding divisive or something. She said that people should watch “everything…all the movies” or words to that effect. She basically chickened out.

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Booed by Dudes at Super Bowl

Why did Taylor Swift get booed again? Because she’s rich? Because she’s “friends” with the increasingly toxic Blake Lively?

Are we to presume that Adam Sandler and Paul Rudd are…what? Hood ornaments?

I’ve never once listened to anything by Ice Spice — should I have?

Due Respect But…

I sat down with Noree Victoria‘s An Arrangement last night, and it didn’t do the thing. Not by my standards.

Co-written by Helen Shang and lead actress Bel Delia, it’s an odd three-hander about the wife of a gubernatorial candidate in rehab, and how her husband’s sexual interest in the assertive nurse threatens to disrupt the whole apple cart.

I immediately decided that I didn’t want to hang with Matt Dellapina‘s Lucas (smart and obsessive, but no charm or charisma — he’s certainly no Gavin Newsom) and Delia’s character, Violet (anxious, pissed off, weakened, downish).

I was intrigued by Jessica Damouni‘s Hannah, but at the same time I couldn’t figure her out. She exuded professional integrity, and didn’t seem like a woman who would consider fucking the husband of a patient.

The scene that tore it for me was when Dellapina begins to vaguely flirt with Hannah within earshot of his wife. Any guy who’s even thinking about possibly cheating on his wife always plays it carefully by making his move as far away from the wife as possible, and certainly out of earshot. But there Violet is, listening in from the other side of the door.

That was when I said “sorry but I don’t believe this movie, and I don’t like the characters enough to stick it out.” So I picked up my leather computer bag and slipped out of the theatre. Very sorry. Best of luck to everyone concerned with future endeavors. Cheers and respect.

Best Pictures Destined To Be Forgotten

It was a big deal at the RKO Pantages theatre when Vincente Minnelli‘s An American in Paris (’51) won the Best Picture Oscar on 3.20.52. It was also a surprise as it was widely presumed that A Streetcar Named Desire or A Place in the Sun would win.

Has any 21st Century film fanatic even thought about An American in Paris recently, much less seen it? The answer is no.

Nearly everyone, on the other hand, has seen Joseph L. Mankiewicz‘s All About Eve (’50), which won the Best Picture Oscar at the same location on 3.29.51. They also regard it quite highly.

Which recent Best Picture winners will be unseen and/or barely remembered 60 or 70 years hence? One such film is Everything Everywhere All At Once…guaranteed. Nobody wants to even think about it now. It was a huge embarassment when it won two years ago, and the shame will persist. The most merciful legacy will be for EEAAO to be forgotten entirely.

Great “F1” Teaser!

Who’s going to die in Joseph Kosinski‘s F1?

Whoever buys the farm (it almost certainly won’t be Damson Idris because black guys have to prevail these days), there’s no ambiguity about the fact that F1 is a total “guy movie.”

Brad Pitt, Idris, Kerry Condon, Tobias Menzies, Javier Bardem, etc.

Opening on 6.27.25, or a bit less than five months hence.

Sasha Explains “Anora’

…for the obstinate “This Is Heavy, Doc” types and others who’ve been somehow unable to really see or feel Sean Baker’s film

In the wake of Anora‘s two big wins last night…this is how that feels to me right now.

The Pacific Felt Like Ice Cubes

I used to routinely go boogie-boarding off the beach in Santa Monica in the ’80s and ’90s, but for some reason I stopped this ritual when the column got rolling in the late ’90s. I splashed around in the balmy Mediterranean when I visited Marina di Campo a quarter-century ago. Before today the last time I swam in the sea anywhere was at Jones Beach in ’06 or thereabouts.

An hour ago I strolled into the Pacific Ocean for the first time in decades, and the water was a shock to my system. Aaagghh! But it felt wonderful all the same. Because there I was, and the cold sensations were as real as it gets.