We all knew Hiddleswift would be over before long, but I was figuring on six months, not three. A hot but brief affair should endure, in my mind, a good half year. That’s how long my last firecracker relationship (May to October of ’13) lasted. Two months of undiluted bliss, two months of things levelling out with this or that issue surfacing but good times continuing, and two months for the wind-down and someone (usually me) finally getting the heave-ho.

There’s only one way to make an affair last six months or six years, and that’s to devote yourself hook, line and sinker to giving your Type-A , high-maintenance girlfriend absolutely everything she might want plus extras. If you hook up with a beautiful headstrong narcissist you’re going to get dropped sooner or later, but the ride is usually worth it because the sex is so good it makes you weep with gratitude. I’m guessing that’s what Hiddleston is telling himself right now.

I don’t believe for a second that Tom Hiddleston and Taylor Swift parted ways because, according to Us magazine, “Tom wanted the relationship to be more public than she was comfortable with.” If you ask me they broke up for one reason and one reason only, and that was Hiddleston’s decision to wear that “I Love T.S.” T-shirt over the 4th of July weekend. No relationship could withstand a gesture of this sort. You have to play it loose and cool and let things happen.  Cast your fate to the wind.