If there’s one thing I’m 100% dead certain of, it’s that I will never, ever watch even a snippet of any Asian-produced or Asian-set film involving the brandishing of swords. Ever. Even watching this trailer for Criterion’s Zatoichi collection puts me off. I’m saying this as an owner of an authentic, razor-sharp samurai sword, which I keep in my living room for worst-case protection. I hated Blind Fury (’89) also. I’m not even sure I could sit through Sydney Pollack‘s The Yakuza again.