If I was really loaded I would try and save LexG from himself. I say this knowing that no one can be saved. You can lead a person who’s in trouble to water but you can’t make them drink. (Most of the time they’ll refuse to drink out of dumb pride.) But I would still try because I believe in his writing. I would pay him a decent salary to bang out some kind of daily HE sub-column, but it would be contingent on his firm commitment to a rehab program and to an austere diet — both of which I would fund. I would throw in a modest but tasteful new wardrobe (no K-Mart lace-ups or cross-training shoes), a year-long membership in a health club and a hair-restoration procedure that would require a visit to Prague. But no hookers. And if he fails to adhere to the program I pull the plug and he’s back to the life he has now. What are the odds that he’d tow the line?