A murder melodrama began unfolding nine days ago in Belize, over an accidental shooting of Henry Jemmott, a 300-pound Belizean police superintendent, on Ambergris Caye. His allegedly accidental assailant is Jasmine Hartin, 32, the “partner” of Andrew Ashcroft, the son of Conservative party donor, former House of Lords member and billionaire Michael Ashcroft.

Right off the top you know Hartin will ultimately skate, although right now she’s being held in Belize Central Prison, an allegedly stinky, cockroach-infested hellhole in Hattieville. She’s currently regarded as a flight risk so no bail.

Guardian report: “[The shooting] happened just past midnight on the Friday before last on the island of Ambergris Caye. The gun, by all accounts, was fired by Hartin. Her apparent explanation, as reported by the press, is relatively simple”…except it isn’t.

“Hartin, the director of lifestyle and experience for her partner’s luxury resort, is believed to have told police that she had been receiving threats on her life. Jemmott — a father of five or six who was apparently taking time off to address personal issues — suggested that she procure a gun license.”

“Jemmott visited Hartin at her apartment. According to her alleged statement to the police, they started drinking and decided to go to a nearby pier to enjoy the moon. Jemmott began to complain about an ache in his shoulders, and Hartin responded by giving him a massage.”

All right, hold it right there. Jemmott, who sounds like the Hank Quinlan of Ambergris Caye with the massive bulk and the drinking and gun-twirling, “taking time off [from his marriage] to address personal issues”…that means catting around. This plus asking Hartin for a massage…give me a break. Jemmott was obviously nursing fantasies of carnally possessing Hartin.

Jemmott and Hartin were boozing it up a bit. Plus he had encouraged her to learn how to shoot — an assertion of his power as a protector, teacher and authority figure plus a potential favoring factor in his dream-attempt to “have” Hartin (at least in his mind). Don’t tell me — sexually speaking younger men are dogs.

“During the massage, Jemmott asked Hartin to pass him the gun. She is said to have claimed that the gun accidentally went off, and a bullet hit the back of his skull, fatally wounding him. His obese body fell onto her. In fright she pushed him off, and he toppled into the sea.”