Who better to cover the Santa Barbara Film Festival’s first-ever animation panel than a columnist who used to watch and even admire certain Jeffrey Katzenberg-sired animated features when the boys were young in the ‘90s, but has since avoided animation like the plague?

I have to say that I feel a tiny bit differently after watching and listening to the five Oscar-nominated animation hotshots who showed up today.

I will always feel vaguely annoyed or tortured by family-friendly animation features but I respect the semblance of soul and obviously serious craft that went into Encanto, Flee, Luca, The Mitchell’s vs. the Machines and Raya and the Last Dragon.

And having now spent a little time with the people who respectively created (or co-created) these films — Charise Castro Smith, Charlotte de la Gournerie, Enrico Casarosa, Mike Rianda and Jon Hall — I can honestly call myself an admirer.

Hall (ginger-haired, glasses) and Rianda (big personality, gray-haired) are the nerdy-looking guys on the right. Charlotte de la Gournerie is the blonde with the high-heeled sandals and the curly frizzy hair, Castro Smith is the short-statured brunette with the jean jacket, and Casarosa is the slender, non-nerdy guy with the big ears and graying goatee.

SBIFF honcho Roger Durling was a gracious and passionate interviewer, asking knowledgeable and thoughtful questions and making everyone feel respected and among friends.

It’s 10:46 am and sunny and fairly warm as Hollywood Elsewhere approaches the Arlington theatre, where Roger Durling’s animation panel will begin at 11 am. As I near the entrance area a young festival volunteer (female, Zoomer) smiles and says with a thin, reedy voice …

Zoomer Volunteer: “Auhyoohereguhfuhanimationevahnt?”

HE: (leaning forward): “Sorry?”

Zoomer volunteer: “Auhyoohereguhfuhanimationevahnt?”

HE (half-smiling): “Uhm, you’re asking me…?”

Zoomer Volunteer (trying to speak coherently, forcing herself to slow down): “Are you here for the animation event?”

HE (hugely relieved): “Yes, I am.”

HE comment-thread post about Simon Rex, from “Their Names In Lights”: “Never have I felt or flashed so much in the way of fan vibes and positive alpha for an actor I’ve only come to know within the last six months.

“Partly because of an award-level performance as one of the skankiest and most deplorable characters I’ve ever contemplated from a Telluride theatre seat, and partly because of something else.

“Because Rex has delivered two extra-relishy performances — as porn star Mikey Sabre and, in a sense, as himself.

“Not that he’s faking anything (I don’t sense this at all) but his award-season ‘act’ — his flair for blending honesty and humility with a form of salesmanship that’s almost on the level of early to mid ’70s Burt Reynolds on the Tonight Show — has been fairly brilliant.”

10:20 pm update: Among SBIFF journos there’s always a kind of competition among SBIFF “Virtuosos”, the idea being to choose who’s scored the highest in terms of charisma, wit, spunk, humor and general likableness.

The hands-down winner of the 2022 Virtuoso panel was Red Rocket’s Simon Rex — no question. The audience loved him. The first and second runners-up were CODA’s Troy Kotsur and West Side Story’s Ariana DeBose. Kudos to the other five, but this is what happened.

Earlier: SBIFF’s Night of the Virtuosos is happening as we speak. Dave Karger is moderating, of course, and the eight honorees are Licorice Pizza’s Alana Haim, West Side Story’s Ariana DeBose, Red Rocket‘s Simon Rex, Belfast ‘s Ciaran Hinds and Catriana Balfe, CODA’s Emilia Jones and Troy Kotsur, and King Richard ‘s Soniyya Sidney. (Belfast’s Jamie Dornan couldn’t make it.)

I had somehow ignored the anecdotal fact that Jones, CODA’s struggling protagonist, is British.

I can hear everyone perfectly from my fourth-row seat…no feedback or echo to speak of. Hats off to SBIFF’s tech crew. (Roger Durling informs that they re-booted the sound controls three or four hours ago, partly because I’d briefly complained about the boom-echo thing.)

Congrats to King Richard‘s Pamela Martin by the way, for snagging the top ACE Eddie award (Drama) earlier this evening. Another setback for The Power of the Dog, of course, but otherwise how meaningful is this?

We’ve all been watching Ukrainian citizens going through absolute hell — people of all ages but especially women and the elderly in shock, sobbing, stumbling around, tears streaming down their cheeks….reports of young children being killed, bomb craters, streets littered with shards of destruction, apartment buildings destroyed, homes burning…

This is not about Americans but my God, have CNN viewers ever witnessed such carnage and terror this vividly?…such a steady barrage, and so immediate.

And it’s going to get worse…much worse for so many…God help them all. The brave and heroic Volodymyr Zelensky, God forbid, might be killed. A name-brand CNN or BBC or SkyNews reporter might catch shrapnel or a bullet in the neck. Broadcast-wise, there’s never been this level of horror delivered this constantly…hour after after, day after day. Yes, it’s just “televised coverage” but my God, it’s devastating. In some ways I feel as if I’m almost there. In spirit I certainly am.

Death to Vladimir Putin…never has the phrase “terminate with extreme prejudice” sounded so apt, so justified, so longed for.

Anne “softball” Thompson is moderating this year’s SBIFF “It Starts With The Script” panel — (l. to r.) King Richard writer Zach Baylin, Belfast director-writer Kenneth Branagh, The Lost Daughter director-writer Maggie Gyllenhaal, CODA director–writer Sian Heder, Don’t Look Up director & co-writer Adam McKay, Dune director & co–writer Denis Villeneuve, The Worst Person in the World director & co-writer Joachim Trier.

It’s happening inside the cavernous Arlington theatre. The usual venue, Santa Barbara’s Lobero theatre, is allegedly being renovated.

The acoustics aren’t right again, or at least they aren’t from my front-row center seat — everyone sounds bassy and echo-y — I haven’t been able to make out a single thought or phrase. I’m sure that a properly mixed video of this panel will be much easier to understand.

McKay doesn’t like to sit up — he prefers to slump with his head resting against the seat. I’m told he suffers from a condition — essential tremors — that prohibits him from normal sitting. The large SBIFF panel chairs were used to accommodate him.

If I were moderating, I would ask Baylin how he, a white guy, managed to write such a frank, absorbing, real-deal script about a black family from Compton? How could he have possibly understood or dramatically translated the story of the Williams family, given his privileged white-guy sensibilities? It’s a facetious question, of course, but I’m sure it came up during King Richards’ hiring phase and/or development.

Oh, and by the way: Thompson is wearing plain black slacks or jeans (relaxed fit), but Gyllenhaal and Heder have both submitted to the fashionista fascists by wearing broadly flared slacks (Gyllenhaal’s outfit is earthy copper, Heder’s is light brown corduroy).

I was astonished when Warner Bros. announced that Matt Reeves would direct yet another Batman film…post-Nolan trilogy, post Schumacher, post-Burton. And yet it turned out pretty well — The Batman is a grand symphony of gloom, and all of a harmonized piece. For those who’ve seen it (and those who haven’t), which of the many Batman films stands the tallest? And how good, really, is Colin Farrell’s Penguin?

Please point out any scene in any 2021 film about any kind of romantic or professional conflict that favorably compares to this one.

What is this scene mainly about? Louise Bryant (Diane Keaton) is angry about her inability to transcend or otherwise work past her limitations as a writer, along with the suffocating sexism that was par for the course back then. Plus she feels overshadowed by the more gifted and energetic John Reed (Warren Beatty), and so she mostly blames Reed. Naturally.

The writing (Trevor Griffith) is flawless; ditto the acting. Beatty-the-actor is always marvelous when he gets angry. Remember the “bark like a dog” scene in Bugsy?

Kristen Stewart night at the Arlington, 15 or 20 minutes before the show began. Masks are no longer mandatory in California, but the SBIFF greeting staff was asking everyone to wear them anyway…fine. I put mine on, smiled at the ushers and walked into the cavernous theatre.

Ten minutes later I was sitting in my usual third-row aisle seat with my mask off, in line with standard protocol (masks worn standing but not sitting). A lean, white-haired provocateur in a plaid jacket (one of the swells who always wait until just before showtime to arrive) came over, did a theatrical double-take and said, “I was just wondering why everyone is wearing masks except you.”

That wasn’t true, in fact — several people sitting in our immediate vicinity (including Charlize Theron, two rows away) weren’t wearing them.

HE reply (calmly): “I’m not wearing my mask for the same reason that sitting restaurant patrons don’t wear them. Plus the CDC says they’re no longer mandatory.”

White-haired guy: “But this is a private event and the festival has asked everyone to wear them.”

HE: “Unless you’re sitting down. Or unless you’re Charlize Theron or Kristen Stewart or Roger Durling or Anne Thompson. Or unless you’re invited to the after-party.”

White-haired guy (leaning over to inspect my press badge): “But but but….”

HE: “Look, I’m not a mask dilletante. I’ve been masking for two years and I’m triple vaxxed, but the mandatory mask stuff is basically over.”

White-haired guy: “You may not be a dilletante, but you might be a jerk.”

HE: “Okay, I’m a jerk.”

The feedback is so bad that Kristen Stewart and IndieWire interviewer Anne Thompson have to avoid speaking directly into their microphones.

Stewart consequently sounds so faint and echo-y that I can’t really hear her…okay, I can hear the occasional phrase or expression. She doesn’t always speak in short, hurried, half-muttered phrases, but she often does.

Will Thompson ask about my all-time favorite Stewart performance — i.e., her ghost whisperer in Olivier Assayas’s Personal Shopper? That, for me, was her absolute peak achievement. I own and cherish the Criterion Bluray.

Thompson: “Your Personal Shopper character was in such an ethereal, spiritual place…it must have been hard to get into that.”

Was Stewart upset about original Twilight director Catherine Hardwicke being more or less thrown off the Twilight franchise? I can’t really hear her response.

I truly admired Stewart several weeks ago when she said she “doesn’t give a shit” about winning the Best Actress Oscar (or words to that effect). Very few contenders on her level have let go with that kind of candor. Hats off.

Thompson asks about Stewart’s starring role in David Cronenberg’s Crimes of the Future. Asked when we might see it, Stewart goes “oh!” but then pulls back and says she’s not sure. Translation: It will debut at Cannes ‘22.

These guys (a) are unarmed, (b) have no Ukrainian friends who will give them shelter and show them around, (c) aren’t prepared for the horror and brutality that awaits, and (d) aren’t even dressed sufficiently to handle the cold.

In short they’re foolish because they’re likely to catch hell and perhaps even die, but I admire the hell out of them.

A part of me (the romantic, non-cowardly part) would like to join them. Part of me (the action junkie) wishes I had been with those Sky News guys who were fired upon by Russian snipers and almost bought it earlier today. A part of me, yes, would rather die under fire than wither away on the vine.

But a larger part of me, I’m ashamed to admit, is a coward. Would I like to somehow grow out of that and become Gary Cooper at the end of For Whom The Bell Tolls? Yes.

Sean Penn, by the way, escaped Ukraine on foot two or three days ago, walking miles to the Polish border.