I remember the derisive chortles during an early press screening of John Derek‘s Tarzan, The Ape Man (’81). I presume that the idea behind the making of David Yates‘ The Legend of Tarzan (Warner Bros. 7.1.16) was to take things in a semi-classy direction a la Hugh Hudson‘s Greystoke (’84). My nose, alas, is smelling a dogshit programmer. The CG is obviously excessive if not ludicrous. Any movie in which the hero swan dives off a high cliff or building is automatically problematic. Why would Alexander Skarsgaard and Margot Robbie costar in this thing? You know that a movie is ahead of the curve when it casts Christoph Waltz as the villain…right?