Why didn’t they call this movie One-Armed Surfer? And I say this as someone who really and truly liked John Stockwell‘s Blue Crush, which this film is presumably trying to emulate on some level. I realize that One-Armed Surfer wouldn’t attract the Star-reading empties this movie is presumably aimed at, but still….Soul Surfer?

Anyone who seriously surfs knows it’s like worshipping at a great cathedral and communing with the eternal, so they’re a soul surfer to begin with. Having your arm bitten off by a shark or learning to live with a handicap is not, due respect, as soulful as the considerable zen of surfing itself. All I know is that the title has told me to avoid this film (opening on April 8th) at all costs.