The Leonardo DiCaprio biopic rule of the 21st Century states that you don’t have to even vaguely resemble the person you’re playing. Leo didn’t look a bit like Howard Hughes, the resemblance between DiCaprio and J. Edgar Hoover was zilch, and the idea of Leo playing Frank Sinatra (which Martin Scorsese has discussed with a straight face) is ludicrous. So Lindsay Lohan can totally play Elizabeth Taylor as she looked during the making of Cleopatra in ’61, ’62 and ’63. She’ll just have to gain a little bit.

The Lifetime film will be a joke, of course, because it’s not a Liz movie as much as a Liz- and-Dick movie, and I guarantee that budget-minded Lifetime won’t be able to find an actor who can even come close to impersonating Richard Burton. It’s a gross understatement to say that Burton’s voice was highly distinctive. Nobody will be able to “do” it…forget it. No decent Dick = no movie.