The coolest thing about John Wick (kionsgatee/Summit, 10.24) is that Keanu Reeves‘ rampage is over a dead dog. It would be 18 times cooler if his deceased wife hadn’t given him the dog as a gift…if he was simply pissed beyond belief that the bad guys killed his four-legged friend. But of course it’s not on that level. The people who made it (co-directors David Leitch and Chad Stahelski, screenwriter Derek Kolstad) obviously aren’t that hip. John Wick is clearly another serving of undisciplined revenge porn in the Taken/Equalizer vein. Or so says the trailer, at least. No restraint, no Tombstones coolness. The gunshots in the trailer alone blow HE’s Ten-Shot Rule all to hell. My non-scientific estimate is that at least a couple of thousand rounds will be fired.

David Leitch is a director’s name; Chad Stahelski is the name of an electrician, a pool-maintenance guy, a surfer.