Season of the Witch is down to an historic 1% Rotten Tomatoes rating, and it’ll still make $11 or $12 million by Sunday night. Which is more than Fair Game has made since opening in early November. Blue Valentine is 20 times better than Season of the Witch and most of the Snookis and Guidos out there would rather die than pay to see it. All because they want to hang with their friends. And to them, Nic Cage, Ron Perlman, murky medieval landscapes and CG demons fall under that category.

Joel and Ethan Coen‘s True Grit beat Little Fockers, earning $4.5 million in 3124 situations to Fockers‘ $4.2 million on 3675 screens. Again, how and why are people still going to see Fockers? It’s awful, it’s hateful, it’s not funny and it’s made roughly $115 million so far. Why? Because Fockers is a kind of comfort blanket, and because Ben Stiller, Robert DeNiro, Teri Polo, Owen Wilson, Blythe Danner, Barbra Streisand, Dustin Hoffman and Jessica Alba are pallies who make audiences feel good on some level, no matter how rancid the film is. It’s diseased but that’s what most people seem to want. I need to breathe into a paper bag.