If You Were An Academy Member in ’71…

…and you were choosing one of the five nominees for the Best Picture Oscar, which would you go for and why? The fucking nominees were Patton, Airport, Five Easy Pieces, Love Story and M*A*S*H.

Hollywood Elsewhere would have definitely voted for Five Easy Pieces, which today is easily the sturdiest and most haunting of the five. Especially that manic goofy piano-playing on the back of the truck scene near Bakersfield, and also the rainy-foggy truck-stop finale (Jack left his jacket in the men’s room!).

Patton is also an excellent watch by today’s standards, and no one will argue against the idea of George C. Scott‘s magnificence as the proud and suffering general, and the ending (“All glory is fleeting”) is one of the best ever, but it seems a bit stodgy now.

My third favorite is M*A*S*H, which has great comic chops and a nice serving of zeitgeist-channelling anti-establishment attitude, but isn’t all that substantial at the end of the day.

Love Story and Airport were regarded as embarassments even back then, and nominating them for Best Picture…please.

In actuality Patton won. The Oscar telecast happened on 4.15.71.