Any movie based on a Stephanie Meyer book is obviously a huge red flag. Another is any film directed or written/adapted by Andrew Niccol (with the exception of Lord of War, which I was half-okay with). A third no-no is any film in which any character jumps or falls from a high building with a double penalty if he/she smashes through a window in order to fall/jump. Doesn’t matter if they live or die — it’s the jumping/falling that offends.

Add them all up and you’ve got The Host, which I wouldn’t watch on Netflix with a knife at my back, much less attend a screening of. The trailer alone sent me into a mood pocket that I’m trying to recover from right now. Atonement, The Lovely Bones, The Way Back, Hanna….Saoirse Ronan was choosing her parts well, and now this?