Continuing Legend of Badge Man

The 60th anniversary of the JFK assassination is three and a half months away. The usual conspiracy titillations will be reconsidered, but no one will ever know anything conclusive about an alleged conspiracy because two witnesses to the murder who had cameras (Abraham Zapruder and Mary Moorman) were too cheap to buy better cameras, and a third witness (Orville Nix, who died in 1972) has two strikes against him — he shot his Dealey Plaza footage with a mildly shitty 8mm camera, and was either too dumb or too lazy to shoot the Kennedy motorcade from a reasonable distance.

If Zapruder had shot the murder with color film inside a decent 16mm camera instead of an 8mm Bell & Howell Zoomatic Director Series Model 414 PD…if Moorman had used a movie camera instead of a black-and-white Polaroid Highlander 80A…if Nix had used a 16mm color movie camera with a decent zoom lens….all three had their unique motives and economic limitations and that’s understandable, but from a forensic perspective they sorta kinda blew it.

Imagine being Orville Nix at 12:28 pm on 11.22.63, standing on the grass in Dealey Plaza between 80 and 100 feet away from Elm Street, all pumped and primed with his 8mm color camera…

Interior Nix dialogue: “Okay, I can hear the motorcycles and the cheering…the Kennedy motorcade is coming down Main Street and will be cruising down Elm in a minute or two…maybe I should run over to Elm to get a decent shot of the President and his wife and Governor Connally??…naahh, it’s better to stand 80 to 100 feet away…that way my family and friends can see the grassy knoll hillside and the plaster walls and the bright blue sky…who needs to capture film of the actual faces of President Kennedy and Jackie?…the green grass and the panoramic vistas are better.”

In the meantime, what about that mysterious muzzle flash and the legend of Badge Man?

HE to JFK conspiracy pallies (including Joseph McBride and Oliver Stone): “A rifle muzzle flash is said to be barely detectable above a grassy knoll wall. Or at least, so says assassination researcher Robert Groden.

Groden’s film A Case for Conspiracy shows a flash above the small concrete wall at frame # 24 in the Nix film, which is the same instant as frame # 313 in the Zapruder film.

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This Shit Has Gone Too Far

Last year we got to a point in the woke-lunacy cycle where it had really gone too far, and Lia Thomas — the broad-shouldered, six-foot-four dude with washboard abs and an allegedly sizable kielbasa — swimming competitively against women like Riley Gaines…this was a demonstration or an incident of certifiable peak insanity, which is to say corporate sport overlords reflexively kowtowing to trans radicals, which led to every liberal person feeling obliged to skip to that rope for fear of being branded a transphobe.

Riley Gaines to Bill Maher: “We’re here…we’re in that place…now.”

Maher: “No, I agree.”

Gaines: “We’re living it, and it’s [gone] entirely too far. And this idea of this or that community being oppressed is silly. It’s silly. There are bad apples in any barrel, but people don’t see color any more. We’re not living in the 1960s. This is not true of every single person but…”

Maher: “I alway say let’s live in the year that we’re living in. We have come such a long way [over the last 50 or 60 years]…”

Gaines: “But you wouldn’t think so [to hear it from the woke] media.”

Maher: “Is racism still a malady in this country? Absolutely. But it’s like we’re using the bloodwork from 1990 to diagnose it, and that’s not where the bloodwork is now. Still an issue, and [of course[ there are lots of racist people, but most of it is ‘I went into a store and got a dirty look from [some cracker].’ Yeah, that happens to people of color, but the mainstream of Americans are just not racist like they used to be. It’s still out there and you can find it, and obviously the legacy [of racism] still lives with us in many ways so it’s not a non-issue. But I agree, the biggest problem that they have on the left is this obsession with race…chasing phantoms of racism that don’t exist any more [for the most part]…

Gaines: “Everyone just wants to be a victim [or comfort a victim].

Maher: “I was just gonna say that. The victim mentality. And that transcends race. Much more generational…that’s your generation.”

Romance Rejected — Femininity Lost or Tossed

From HE’s own Nerdword (youngish, Canadian, female) comes another lament about aggressive, dude-dissing fembot narcissism having led to a mass emotional abyss in which everyone seems to have forgotten what happiness or at least emotional contentment looks like.

Nerdword: “I’ve noticed a trend in the last few years with female empowerment shows and movies. They typically don’t include a romance. And if there is a male side character, they usually play second fiddle to the female and know it.”

Tony Curtis’s Redemption

Last night Jett told me he recently re-watched Some Like It Hot (having seen it many times), and it suddenly hit him that (a) Tony Curtis‘s Joe character is a truly odious womanizer and (b) he doesn’t like him very much, and that Joe’s ugliness colored Jett’s basic attitude about the film.

I found this a familiar and even vaguely amusing viewpoint as this is a typical Millennial thing (moral condemnation + faint notions of cancelling directed toward a self-absorbed prick who wouldn’t fit into today’s realm).

My response: “But that’s the point of the character. Joe is ‘a liar and a phony’, as he admits to Marilyn Monroe‘s Sugar at the very end, but he gradually develops empathy and a conscience after putting on a wig and falsies and wearing a dress and thereby realizing ‘how the other half lives.’

“Joe feels so badly about lying to Sugar (i.e., pretending to be a Shell Oil heir) and then breaking her heart when he and Jack Lemmon‘s Jerry are forced to go on the lam in order to avoid Spats Columbo and his gang that he gives her the only item of value between them — a diamond bracelet that Joe E. Brown‘s Osgood Fielding had given Lemmon’s ‘Daphne’ (and which Joe has technically stolen).

“This is part of his third-act redemption,” I went on. “This plus Joe’s admitting to Sugar that he’s the same kind of thoughtless cad she’s been emotionally bruised by so often.

“Whenever a flawed movie character lets his guard down and admits to a significant moral failing, he’s taken a slight but significant step toward becoming a better human being.”

Example: The last-minute emotional breakthrough experienced by Anthony Quinn’s Zampano in Federico Fellini’s La Strada. A terrible brute throughout the whole film but at the very last minute he realizes who and what he is. His weeping on the beach symbolizes a kind of redemption. Small but noteworthy.

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Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

After 21 months of scintillating baby vibes within a passive, moody or euphoric, in-and-out dynamic, the suddenly much-more-verbal-and-assertive Sutton actually called me “papa” a few times yesterday and two or three times motioned me to sit down next to her (patting the seat to indicate where I should plant my butt) and reached out and took my hand and led me around several times.

Her moods are rather moody as she’s now in her “terrible two” phase and giving her mother attitude (it began several weeks ago), but from my humble perspective it’s quite a thing when your granddaughter suddenly addresses you by name and urges you to do this or notice that with three- or four-word sentences.

Hundreds of billions have been through this, but it was the first time for this particular horse.

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Late To “Sound of Freedom” Smear Attempt

Tip of the hat to World of Reel‘s Jordan Ruimy for digging into the recent Sound of Freedom smear that involved a clumsy mischaracterizing of alleged child-kidnapper Fabian Marta, who (a) is not a financier of the film but merely one of the film’s 6,678 crowdfunders and (b) is involved with some kind of child-custody mishegoss that apparently that has zip to do with child trafficking.

Marta’s lawyer Scott Rosenblum to Deadline‘s Anthony D’Alessandro: “I don’t understand how they’re charging him with this…he has nothing to do with kidnapping anyone.”

I washed my hands of Sound of Freedom after that Bedminster Golf Club screening for Donald Trump, but a few slipshod media outlets (including Newsweek) jumped on the Marta story a day or two ago, seemingly energized by the idea of slandering the Angel Studios release because it’s a rightwing thing. This is not cool.

Smarter Than It Immediately Sounds

Titles can deceive. The Kill Room (Shouut!, 9.28) sounds primitive but the trailer indicates otherwise — it’s apparently a moderately sophisticated, smartly written dark comedy.

Directed by Groundlings and Funny or Die veteran Nicol Paone and written by Jonathan Jacobson, it’s about a hitman (Joe Manganiello) who accidentally becomes a sensation as a hip avant-garde painter.

Pic costars Uma Thurman, Samuel L. Jackson, Maya Hawke (who also stars as Flannery O’Connor in Wildcat, co-written and directed by dad Ethan Hawke), Dree Hemingway and Debi Mazar.